Lost In Darkness
by BTRobsession
Summary: Kendall hasnt been himself lately and it seems no matter what Logan says or does it causes him physical pain. but when Logan finds out some unexpected news,will Kendall change. slight MPREG in later chapters. if not your thing dont read.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: im not sure about this story, i dont know if i should finish it. so i posted this to see what you guys think. should i finish yes or no.**

I sighed and examined myself in the mirror. Nothing was really different about my body, it still looked the same. The only difference was the bruises that now seemed to cover most of it. I know he didn't mean to take his anger out on me, but I wish he wouldn't. I tried telling him to stop doing it, but that only made him more angry, and more pain for me. I gently touched one of the blackish- purple spots, it hurt a little. I received that one last night, after we returned from the studio. Kendall was stressed out from all the work we have been doing, and being stressed caused him to get angry. I guess I said something that he didn't agree with, and it earned me a punch in the side.

I didn't tell James and Carlos about how Kendall beats me, I don't want them to worry. Besides the constant beatings, I still loved Kendall deeply and I knew he loved me back. I just wish he would stop hitting me, and our relationship was how it was in the beginning. Kendall promised me he would never hurt me in anyway, but like previous promises, that one was broken too.

"Logie, you still in there" Kendall said from behind the door.

"Yeah, I'll be out in a sec" I said.

"Ok" he said before walking away.

I sighed and decided to take a quick shower. I adjusted the water till it was perfect temperature. Once the water touched my body, my muscles relaxed. I wanted to stay in the shower all day, but I knew I couldn't.

After I was finished and dressed, I headed into to the kitchen. James and Carlo were eating breakfast and talking about throwing another party.

"Hey Logan" James said looking up from his conversation with Carlos.

"Hi guys" I said sitting down at the table.

"Are you ok?" Carlos asked.

"Yeah you don't look so good" James added.

"No, I'm fine" I said putting on a fake smile.

Of course I wasn't fine, my body ached, I was exhausted and my boyfriend secretly beats me. But know one needs to know that.

"Hey Logie" Kendall said wrapping his arms around me.

I gasped and jumped in my chair. "Oh hi"

"What's wrong? Did I scare you?" Kendall asked.

"Just a little bit" I said.

"Sorry" he said gently kissing my neck.

I loved it when Kendall was affectionate with me. But why couldn't he be like this all the time.

"Its ok" I said.

"Anyway, what's the plan for today?" James asked.

"We have to be in the studio in an hour" I said.

Carlos groaned. "Why cant we just have the day off?"

"I know. I said standing up. But we have to"

"Maybe today wont be so bad" James said.

Carlos sighed. "I hope your right"

We got dressed and headed over to Rocque Records. I wasn't really up to singing, dancing or whatever was planned for us today. I could tell no one else was either.

"Dogs your late" Gustavo said.

I looked at the clock, we were only two minutes late.

"Sorry" I mumbled.

We got into the recording booth and the music for Till I Forget About You came on. Kendall started singing first. I thought he sounded good, but apparently not to Gustavo.

"Stop!" Gustavo yelled.

We all stopped and looked at him.

"Kendall, what was that?" Gustavo said.

"Uh singing" Kendall said.

"It didn't sound like singing to me"

We all rolled our eyes. Gustavo had to complain about something every time.

"It did to me" Kendall said.

"Well then there is something wrong with your ears, and your voice" Gustavo said.

I noticed Kendall tense up with anger, and clutch his hands into fists. I sighed, I knew later I would probably have another bruise.

"Hold on guys" Kelly said before turning off the microphone.

We all watched from inside the booth, as Kelly and Gustavo were yelling at each other. After a few minutes, Kelly turned the microphone back on.

"Sorry about that" she said smiling apologetically.

"Lets do a different song" Gustavo said.

We nodded in agreement and sang a new song. After recording, we had to practice some new dance moves. We didn't mess up as much as we usually do, until Kendall fell over from trying a new move.

"Ugh fuck" he said.

I ran over and helped him up. Today was not his day I guess.

"Are you ok?" I asked.

"Yeah, yeah I'm good" he said taking my hand.

"What was that? How could you mess up such a simple move?" Mr. X screamed at Kendall.

Kendall just glared at Mr. X, not really in the mood for another lecture. I hope he wasn't going to say something back, like the smartass he is. Kendall opened his mouth to say something, but I quickly grabbed his hand and gently squeezed it. He got the message and closed his mouth.

Mr. X continued lecturing Kendall about how stupid it was for him to screw up something so simple, and ruin the whole routine.

"You know what, I'm done" Kendall said walking towards the studio exit.

"Fine, leave" Mr. X said. Shooing him away.

"Fine" Kendall said before walking out of the studio.

James and Carlos looked at me, wanting me to fix all of this. I sighed and ran after him. I searched all over the place, but couldn't find him anywhere. I walked to the parking lot, and found him sitting on a curb. His face was covered with his hands,

"Kendall" I said walking towards him.

He looked up and gave me a small smile. "Hey Logie"

I sat down next to him and put my head on his shoulder. He rested his head against mine.

"Today has been hell" he said.

"Aw, it wasn't that bad" I said.

"Logan, Gustavo and Mr. X yelled at me for stupid reasons" he said.

"But they do that all the time"

"Are you defending them?" Kendall asked standing up suddenly.

"No of course not, I just think your overreacting" I said.

"Overreacting, how Logan?" he yelled.

Great I ruined everything. He was calm and now he was angry all over again. I blame myself.

"No Kendall, what I meant was…" I started.

"Just shut up, I know what you meant" Kendall said.

I stood up and gave him a hug. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean too say that"

He pushed me off and I stumbled backwards, but luckily I caught myself.

"Kendall?" I asked.

"Don't talk to me" he said walking away.

"Kendall I'm sorry" I said grabbing his shoulder.

I know I shouldn't have done that, but I wasn't going to let him walk away with from me.

"Leave me alone" he screamed and punched me in the face.

I fell to the pavement, shocked and scared. I started crying and all he did was walk away. I thought he would have at least helped up, but he didn't, he didn't care what he did. I cried for a few minutes, but I didn't blame him for hitting me, it was my fault anyway I deserved it. Once I pulled myself together and figured I was decent, I went back inside the studio.

Kendall wasn't back yet, so I assumed he was still calming down.

"Hey Logan, did you… whoa what happened to you" James asked.

"Nothing, why?" I said.

"Your bleeding" Carlos said.

I ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. James and Carlos was right, my lip was cut open and bloody.

"What happened?" James asked.

"I… uh…fell" I said.

Carlos and James exchanged glances, not sure if they should believe me or not.

"I tripped when I was looking for Kendall" I lied.

Carlos nodded his head and handing me a wet paper towel. "Does it hurt?"

"Not really. I said. Its not that bad"

"Yeah, it could've been worse" James said.

"What else does Mr. X want us to do?" I asked changing the subject.

"Nothing really, he said we can just go home" James said.

"Yeah, so we get the rest of the day to do whatever we want" Carlos said with a smile.

"Well thank Kendall for that" James said.

I sighed. "I hoped he calmed down"

"He probably did, don't worry about it" James said putting his arm around my shoulder.

I nodded and followed them to meet Kelly, to take us back to the Palm Woods.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Ok i decided to finish this story, thanks to all the great reviews i got. thank you =D i hope everyone likes this chapter.**

"Hey boys, how was rehearsal?" Mrs. Knight asked us as we walked into apartment 2J.

"Fine" Carlos said while heading into the kitchen for a snack.

"Oh honey what happened to you?" Mrs. Knight asked running over to me.

"Nothing, I'm fine" I said.

"But your lip, it bleeding"

"I just hurt myself, its fine"

"Here I'll clean it up, just sit on the couch" Mrs. Knight said before going into her room.

I sighed and sat down and waited for her to return.

"Here this should help" she said coming back and gently patting my lip with a washcloth.

"Is Kendall here?" I asked.

"He is in his room, what's going on with him?" Mrs. Knight asked.

"He is just having a bad day, you know how Gustavo is" I said.

"Well maybe you can cheer him up, he wont talk to me" Mrs. Knight said.

I sighed. "Maybe"

She furrowed her eyebrows. "Are you guys doing ok?"

"Yeah we're doing good, but…" I said.

"But"

"I just want to give him some space" I said.

"I think he is calm now, go talk to him" she said.

I stood up. "Thanks mama Knight, for helping me with my lip"

She smiled. "Your welcome, but be careful next time"

I nodded and went to mine and Kendall's room. He was laying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. I gently closed the door behind me.

He looked up at me and smiled. "Hey Logie"

I gave him a small smile, but still stayed by the door.

"Come here" he said calmly.

I hesitated. I was still a little scared he might hurt me again.

He sighed and came towards me. I flinched when he hugged me.

"I'm so sorry Logie" he whispered in my ear.

I nodded into his shoulder. He said that word so many times, I didn't know if I should believe it this time.

"I was just having a bad day, and I took it out on you, I'm sorry" he said.

I let go of his grasp and looked into his eyes, they were filled with hurt.

"Its ok, I shouldn't have made it worse" I said.

"But Logie, it wasn't your fault, I was overreacting. he said. I just didn't want to admit it"

I nodded and he gave me a peck on the lips. I pulled away because of the pain.

"Sorry" he said.

"I forgive you" I said.

He smiled and pulled me into another hug.

"I love you so much" he said.

"I love you too" I said back

"Come on, lets go join the others"

He grabbed my hand and led me into the living room.

"Are you feeling better?" Mrs. Knight asked Kendall when we entered the living room.

"Yeah" Kendall said sitting down on the orange couch.

"See Logan, only you can fix him" Mrs. Knight said with a smile.

I gave her a fake smile. _"I wish I could fix him" _I thought.

"Kendall, do you know how Logan hurt himself?" Mrs. Knight asked.

"Um…no. Kendall said. I have no idea."

I just looked at him, he always lied to cover up what he does to me.

"Mama Knight, I'm fine. I said. I just tripped, you know how clumsy I am"

She sighed. "I just don't like seeing you boys get hurt"

I looked down, if only she knew what I went through.

"Logie, you ok?" Kendall asked.

I looked up at him. "Yeah"

"Come here" he said patting the couch with his hand.

I slowly walked over and sat next to him. He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close.

"So what are we going to do now?" Carlos asked leaning against the counter in the kitchen.

"How about the pool?" James suggested.

"Yeah that's fine" Kendall said.

"Whoo!" Carlos said running to his and James room.

James smiled and followed him to go change as well.

Kendall stood up and handed me his hand. "Come on"

I took his hand and we went into our room. I sat down on my bed, while Kendall pulled out his swim stuff.

"Aren't you going to change?" he asked.

"Huh? Oh yeah" I said.

"Well come on, we don't have all day" he snapped.

"Kendall please don't start" I said.

"I'm not starting anything"

"Well I'm not"

"Now you are" Kendall said sounding angry.

"Kendall, can we please just drop it and enjoy our afternoon" I said.

He rolled his eyes. "Then stop acting bitchy"

"I'm not acting bitchy. I said standing up. You're the one who is acting like a jerk"

His eyes grew dark with anger, they weren't the pretty green I'm used to.

"Kendall, I didn't mean that… I'm sorry" I said.

He came closer to me, our noses almost touching.

I started shaking gently. "P-please Kendall…I-I'm sorry"

He grabbed me by the shoulders and pushed me on the bed. I tried to move, but he had me pinned down.

"Don't ever call me that again, got it" he said.

I nodded my head, I was to scared to say anything. I could feel my eyes fill up with tears, but I did my best to hold them back.

"Why are you crying? I haven't done anything to you" Kendall said.

"Are you?" I asked.

"I don't know"

"P-please don't" I said.

I couldn't hold back the tears anymore, and they ran down my face. Staining my cheeks.

"Stop crying" Kendall whispered angrily.

I tried to stop, but I was terrified.

"K-Kendall, please let me go" I said.

"You can go when I say" he said.

"Please, I said I was sorry"

He got off me, and I sat up. I looked at him, he still looked angry, but at least I didn't get hurt this time.

He sighed. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that"

"I-its fine" I sniffed.

"No its not. He said sitting down next to me. I need to learn to control myself better"

I didn't say anything, just looked down at my hands. He lifted my head up so I could look at him.

"I'm sorry" he said wiping the tears off my face.

I nodded. "Ok"

He pulled me into a hug. "I love you"

"I-I love you too" I said.

"Come on lets go to the pool" he said.

He quickly changed and left the room. I purposely waited for him to leave, so I could change. I didn't want him to see all the bruises he gave me. But maybe if he did see them, he would feel guilty and stop. Or it would make him feel good, because he was causing me so much pain. I changed into my swim trunks and t-shirt, and went into the living room.

"Ok lets go" James said.

We headed to the pool, and took our usual spots in the lounge chairs. Carlos, James and Kendall decided to swim, so they removed their shirts and jumped in the pool.

"Come on Logan" Carlos said.

I shook my head. "I don't feel like it"

Carlos frowned. "Aw why?"

"I just want to relax" I said.

"Ok" Carlos said and turned his attention back to James and Kendall.

They looked like they were having fun, and I really wanted to join them. But if I took my shirt off, all my bruises would be exposed, and I couldn't have that. I sighed and closed my eyes. Finally I could relax and take a little nap, at least I could dream of Kendall and I before he changed. That of course didn't last long. I awoke to someone shaking my shoulders.

"Logan, Logan wake up"

I opened my eyes to see James gently shaking me.

"Huh?" I asked sleepily.

"We are going back inside" James said.

I nodded and followed them back to our apartment. After we were showered and dressed, we sat on the couch. It was movie night and Carlos's turn to choose. Mrs. Knight ordered us pizza, so we had that, plus the other snacks Carlos brought out. Katie and Mrs. Knight left to go see their own movie, so it was just us guys tonight.

Carlos wanted to watch a scary movie, which I wasn't so happy about. Scary movies aren't my thing. After a few minutes of going through all the DVDs, he picked Descent..

"Again Carlos" James said.

"I like this movie, it so creepy" Carlos said popping the movie in the DVD player.

I have never seen the movie before, because last time they watched it, I fell asleep.

"You don't get to sleep through the movie this time" Kendall said wrapping his arm around me.

"Fine, but what if its too scary" I said.

"Then I'll be here to protect you" he said.

"_Can you protect me from yourself" _I thought.

The movie started and Kendall pulled me closer. I snuggled into his arms. Every time there was a scary part, I would hide my face in Kendall's chest. He would smile and tell me everything was going to be ok. Once the movie was over, I quickly turned on the lights. James and Carlos were passed out on the floor.

"James, wake up" I said gently shaking him.

"Lets just leave them here" Kendall said.

"Ok" I said and headed back to the couch.

I laid down and placed my head in Kendall's lap. He was actually really comfortable. He started playing with my hair, and I could feel myself drifting off to sleep.

"I love you" he whispered

"I love you too" I whispered back.

He kissed my head and I fell asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: ok this chapter is really short and i think it kinda sucks. but i hope it doesnt suck to u guys =D**

I awoke the next morning, and noticed Kendall wasn't there. I sat up quickly and looked around. James and Carlos were passed out on the floor, but Kendall was no where in sight. The front door opened and Kendall walked in.

He smiled. "Good morning"

I smiled back. "Morning"

"How did you sleep?" he asked.

I yawned. "Good I guess, you?"

"Good"

"Where did you go?" I asked.

"For a walk" he said.

I frowned. "Why didn't you wake me? I could've gone with you."

"I was going to invite you, but you looked so peaceful"

"Thanks, how was your walk?"

"It was good, I got to think things over." Kendall said walking into the kitchen.

I got up and followed him into the kitchen.

"What kind of things?" I asked.

"Just some things, its nothing to worry about" he said

"But if your not telling me, then I will start to worry" I said.

"Logie its fine, don't worry" he said before kissing my forehead.

I sighed. "Ok"

He smiled and started to make breakfast.

I raised one of my eyebrows. "Your making breakfast"

"Yeah, I wanted to give my mom and you a break" he said.

I walked up behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"I love you" I said into his shoulder.

"I love you too, now go get dressed and breakfast will be ready soon" he said.

I nodded and headed to our shared room. Before I got in the shower I examined myself in the mirror. Some of my bruises were fading, which was good, I just hoped I didn't receive new ones. I quickly showered and dressed, then went back into the living room. I was glad Kendall was in a good mood, and I planned on keeping it that way. I decided to wake James and Carlos.

"Come on wake up" I said while gently shaking Carlos.

He groaned and rolled over. I shook James, but he didn't budge.

I sighed. "Kendall, a little help"

"Sure" he said coming into the living room.

"I cant wake them" I said.

"Hmm, your gonna want to move for this" he said.

I moved out of the way as Kendall jumped on top of Carlos and James. They woke up with a start.

"What the hell Kendall!" James yelled.

"Its time to get up" Kendall said.

"Well you could've said so, not attack us" James said sounding annoyed.

"This was much more fun" Kendall laughed.

Carlos and James exchanged looks, and I immediately knew what they were planning.

"One" James said.

"Two" Carlos said.

"Three!" they both yelled and attacked Kendall.

They were wrestling and laughing, and I couldn't help but smile. Things seemed like they were before. I laughed at Kendall, James and Carlos had him pinned down, and he couldn't move. I felt someone grab my ankle and pull me down, I landed on top of Kendall. He smiled and rolled me over so he was on top of me. I looked into his eyes, they were his pretty green and filled with happiness, not anger. He leaned in and kissed me on the lips, I kissed him back and ran my fingers through his hair.

"I'm done" James said standing up.

"Me too" Carlos said also getting up.

Kendall stopped and looked into my eyes. "Lets eat now"

I sighed. "Fine"

He gave me another quick kiss, then helped me up. James and Carlos were already helping themselves to French toast and bacon. I sat down and began eating quietly. Kendall took the seat next to me and grabbed my hand.

"How is it?" Kendall asked.

"Its very good" I said.

He chuckled. "It seems Carlos loves it too"

"Mhm" Carlos said nodded with his mouth full.

During breakfast, we talked about hockey, work, and how mean Gustavo is. Kendall started making fun of Gustavo, which caused orange juice to squirt out of Carlos's mouth and spraying James in the face. We all laughed hard at that, even James joined in afterwards. Through out the rest of the day, Kendall wasn't angry, he was his normal self. I couldn't help but smile at that, maybe that walk helped him to relax. If that's the case he should do it more often.

After a hard day of work, I was glad the week was finally over and I could crawl into my warm bed.

"Hey Logie" Kendall said from his bed.

I turned over to face him. "Yeah"

"What should we do this weekend?"

"I don't know, what did you want to do?" I asked.

'I wanted to spend it with you" he said.

I blushed at least ten shades of red. I was really starting to think Kendall was changing his ways and being his normal sweet self.

"Goodnight Logie, I love you" he said.

"I love you too" I said.

Kendall closed his eyes and was soon asleep, snoring softly. I rolled on to my back and smiled. I had my Kendall back.


	4. Chapter 4

The next morning I awoke, feeling relaxed and for the first time in weeks happy. Kendall was going to stop hitting me, I just knew it. I rolled over to face Kendall, he was sleeping peacefully. I looked at my alarm clock, it was eight, we didn't have to be in the studio today because it was Saturday. I got out of bed and showered. Once I was out of the shower and dressed, I went back in my room only to be greeted by Kendall. He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me into a kiss.

"Morning" he said after letting go.

"Morning" I said.

"Do you know what today is?" he asked.

"Uh Saturday" I said.

"Yup, and I get to spend it with you"

I smiled and gave him another kiss. He gently pushed me on his bed, and started kissing my neck. I couldn't help but moan when he sucked a sensitive part. He lowered his hands to my crotch, causing me to gasp.

"Kendall, I'm not ready" I said.

He stopped kissing me. "I'm sorry, I'll wait"

"Its ok" I said and giving him a peck on the lips.

"I guess we should see if everyone is awake" Kendall said.

"Yeah, but I doubt it. I said. Its too early for them"

He chuckled and stood up. "Come on"

I got up and followed him into the living room. Of course I was right, no one was up. We decided to watch T.V. till everyone was awake. Kendall was going through the channels while I cuddled with him. I was starting to feel sleepy, and tried to stay awake, but my eyes kept fluttering.

"Logie, just go back so sleep" Kendall said.

I yawned. "I'm not tired"

He chuckled. "Sure, the yawn didn't give it away."

I smiled and rested my head in his lap, and soon fell asleep. Kendall woke me up a few hours later.

"What time is it?" I asked rubbing my eyes.

"Its twelve" he said

"Twelve, I slept that long"

"It was only four hours, relax"

"I never sleep this late though" I said.

"But you needed the rest, you have looked exhausted all week." Kendall said.

"Yeah, it did feel good to sleep a little longer."

He nodded and stood up from the couch.

"Where's James and Carlos?" I asked.

"Their down by the pool" Kendall said.

"Why didn't you go with them?"

"I wanted to wait for you"

"You didn't have to you know" I said.

"Well I would rather spend time with you, then go to the pool" he said.

"But there is nothing to do up here" I said.

"Yeah there is"

"Like what"

"This" he said leaning in and kissing me.

He put his hand behind my head and laid me down on my back. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and let him explore my mouth with his tongue.

"Mmm" I moaned.

Our make out session was interrupted by the sound of someone clearing their throat. We stopped and looked up to find James and Carlos staring at us.

"We weren't doing anything" I said.

"Mhm sure" James said.

Carlos started laughing. "Cant you guys keep your hands off each other for one second"

"No because Logan is so irresistible" Kendall said.

"Gross" Carlos said.

I frowned. "Thanks"

"No offense" Carlos said.

"I'm surprised Mrs. Knight didn't catch you" James said.

"Where is she?" I asked.

"She went out with Katie to get groceries" Carlos said.

"Yeah she will be back any minute" James said.

Just then the front door opened, and Katie and Mrs. Knight walked in.

"Good morning, or should I say good afternoon" Mrs. Knight said.

I smiled then got up to help her with the groceries. Carlos and James grabbed a bag, but went through it instead of putting things away. After everything was put away, we decided to play dome hockey. It was Kendall and I against James and Carlos, but of course Kendall and I won, which caused Carlos and James to pout.

"Now what?" I asked.

"Swirly slide!" Carlos said

We all scrambled up to the slide, but Carlos made it up first. We were having fun and laughing, until it was interrupted.

"Boys!" Mrs. Knight yelled.

We stopped and quickly slid down to meet her.

"Katie is going to a friends house for a couple of days, because I have a business trip" Mrs. Knight said.

"We could watch her mom, its no big deal" Kendall said.

"Thanks honey, but I wanted to give you guys sometime to yourself"

"Whoo hoo!" Carlos said.

"But there are still rules." Mrs. Knight said.

We nodded and waited for her to tell us.

"Please don't destroy anything, clean up after yourselves, and no parties." she said counting on her fingers.

"Ok mom, we promise" Kendall said.

I noticed he crossed his fingers behind his back when he said that.

"Ok be good" she said before giving us each a kiss on the cheek.

"You actually believe they will be good" Katie said.

Mrs. Knight rolled her eyes. "Come on"

"Bye" we said as they left the apartment.

"You know what this means" Kendall said.

"Party!" James and Carlos yelled.

"But we said we wouldn't" I said.

"Logie its fine" Kendall said.

"But what if Bitters finds out, we'll get another strike"

"Then James can take care of him." Kendall said.

"You bet I will" James said.

"What do I do?" Carlos asked.

"Hmm, you and James get the snacks and Logan and I will decorate." Kendall said.

"Yes sir" Carlos saluted.

"Ok its about four o'clock now, so that gives us enough time to set up before seven thirty" Kendall said.

We all nodded our heads.

"Move out" Kendall said.

James and Carlos quickly left the apartment.

"Ok lets get to work" Kendall said.

We spent the next few hours decorating the place, till it looked somewhat like a club.

"Wow, we did good" Kendall said.

"Yeah, but we better not get caught" I said.

"Just relax, its fine"

"How do you know?"

"I just do, I promise you nothing bad is going to happen tonight" he said.

Carlos and James entered the room, with their arms full of bags. Kendall and I quickly helped them, then set up the drinks and snacks.

"Great, now we have to get rid of Bitters" Kendall said.

"I'm on it" James said before dashing out of the room.

"Now, we just need to invite people" Kendall said.

"Got it" Carlos said pulling out his phone.

"I'll do it. Kendall said pulling out his own phone.

"Why?" asked Carlos.

"Remember last time you were in charge to invite people" Kendall said.

How could we forget, Carlos invited his whole phone by mistake. Which caused us to lose control of the party.

"Oh right" Carlos said.

"And done. Kendall said pressing the send button. Now we wait"

That didn't take long, about a minute later the doorbell rang. Carlos rushed over and opened it. "Whoo its party time!" he yelled.

"Whoo!" all the people said as they entered the apartment.

The music started and everyone started dancing and enjoying themselves. James retuned forty five minutes later.

"Bitters is under control" he said.

"What did you do?" I asked.

"Lets just say he is locked in a supply closet." James said.

That's not the first time James locked him in a supply closet.

"Thanks James" I said.

"Don't thank me, thank Bandanna Man" James said.

I smiled and enjoyed myself. Kendall and I were hanging out on the couch talking, when Jo and Camille walked in. Camille looked over at us and gave me the dirtiest look ever. She hates me now because I broke up with her. But when I was with her I didn't feel a spark, only when I was with Kendall. Jo also looked mad, but at Kendall. He too broke up with her for me. But both girls didn't know Kendall and I are dating, they just thought we didn't like them back.

"Who invited them?" I asked.

Kendall looked over at them. "Not me, they must've snuck in or something"

I just glared at them, I didn't want them here, they could do something stupid.

"Logie relax, they wont do anything" Kendall asked.

I sighed. "Fine, but I'm ignoring them."

He stood up. "Do you want anything to drink?"

"Yeah sure"

I watched as he went into the kitchen, but he was followed by Jo. I growled, but no one could here it because the music was so loud. She started talking to him and then they were laughing. I couldn't take it, I got up and went into my room, slamming the door behind me. Kendall was starting to piss me off and I didn't want to deal with him right now. I collapsed on my bed and let out a long sigh. I decided to read, because that always relaxes me. I picked up my favorite book and started reading. About an hour later, my bedroom door opened and Kendall walked in.

"Hey Logie" he said.

"Hi" I said coolly.

"Why are you in here?"

"I wanted to be alone" I said.

He frowned and stumbled towards me.

"Kendall are you ok?" I asked.

"Y-yeah… I'm… I'm fine" he said.

He sat down next to me and put his arm around my shoulder. That's when I could smell it. The smell of alcohol.

"Kendall are you drunk?" I asked.

"I don't… uh… know… maybe" he said.

"How the hell did you get a hold of alcohol?" I asked standing up.

"Some…someone…someone brought some" he said.

I rolled my eyes. "Come on Kendall, I know your more responsible then that"

"I sorry" he said standing up as well.

"Just don't drink ok, its not good" I said.

He nodded and leaned in to kiss me. I tried to back away, but he was fast and he pressed his lips to mine. He didn't taste like Kendall anymore, he tasted like alcohol. I tried to push him off, but he just held me tight and shoved me on the bed. He started kissing my neck and sucking it. He lowered his hands to my pants, and tried to unbutton them.

"Kendall, you said we can wait" I said

"I'm tired of waiting" he said.

"Kendall I'm not ready, please stop"

"Well I'm ready"

He started unbuttoning my pants, but I hit him in the face. He stopped and looked at me, anger filled his eyes.

"Kendall I'm sorry" I said.

That's when it happened, he punched me in the eye. I started to cry but that only made it worse. He slapped me across the face then punched me in the jaw.

"Now your going to stop crying, and let me fuck you, got it" he said angrily.

"No Kendall…please" I said.

He grabbed my arms and pinned them down. "Shut the fuck up"

I cried harder, and that made him more angry and he punched me in the nose. I hated Kendall when he hurt me, but now that he was drunk and doing it, I hated him more. He let go of my arms and continued to remove my pants. I didn't think my first time would be like this.

"Kendall stop… please" I whimpered.

He ignored me and grabbed the hem of my boxers. I reached for his hands, but he only slapped me again. I gave up on fighting back, and let him continue. He removed my boxers, then started to undo his pants. After his pants and boxers were at his knees, he positioned himself to enter me. I knew he was supposed to prepare me first, but he didn't, he just slammed right into me. I screamed so loud from the pain.

"Kendall stop!" I shouted.

He covered my mouth with his hand. "Shut up!"

I started to cry again, he never stopped. He didn't care.

I tried to relax, but I couldn't. The pain was unbearable, but yet he seemed to enjoy it. He finally stopped and let out of me. He pulled his pants back up, then headed for the door.

"Thanks Logie" he said before leaving and returning to the party.

I cleaned myself up and changed into my pajamas, I was crying the whole time. I felt ashamed and dirty. How could he do that to me, I thought he loved and respected me. I laid back down on my bed, and cried myself to sleep.

**A/N: yeah Kendall is a dick, and i'm sorry Logan =(. i hope this chapter wasnt so bad and i bet a lot of you guys hate me for doing that to Logie. sorry =(.**


	5. Chapter 5

**The next morning was the worst morning of my life. My eye hurt and I was really sore. I could hardly walk, or stand up straight for that matter. I still couldn't believe Kendall would do something so horrible to me. I was used to the physical abuse, but being sexually abused was far worse. I looked at my reflection in the mirror, it wasn't me at all. The person staring back at me was hurting, and could do nothing about it. I was never like this, I used to be happy about life, but now what's the point. I examined my eye. It was black and purple, and slightly swollen. I also noticed I still had some dried blood, from getting punched in the nose. How was I going to explain this to everyone? I wasn't. No one was going to learn my secret.**

**I quietly made my way into the living room. The apartment was a disaster. There were empty cups, food and beer bottles scattered everywhere. Kendall was passed out on the couch, clutching a beer bottle in one hand. I shook my head and went into the kitchen. I opened the freezer and grabbed a bag of frozen peas. I placed the bag over my eye and leaned against the counter.**

"**Good morning Logan"**

**I looked up to see James enter the kitchen.**

"**What the hell happened to you?" he asked.**

"**Oh you know how wild parties get" I said.**

**He raised an eyebrow. "Logan, you never get wild at parties."**

"**Well I decided to try it for once" I said.**

"**I know your lying, what's going on?" he asked.**

**I sighed. "Ok the truth is, last night I went to my room and…"**

**He nodded his head. "Go on"**

"**And um… Camille followed me and punched me in the eye" I lied.**

"**Is she that mad at you" James said.**

**I nodded. "Yeah"**

"**I'm sorry man, do you want me to talk to her?" he asked.**

"**No its fine" I said.**

"**Ok, well I'm gonna wake up Kendall" James said.**

**I nodded as he walked into the living room.**

"**Hey Kendall get up" James said.**

"**Why" Kendall groaned.**

"**Dude just get up"**

**James came back in the kitchen with Kendall right behind him.**

"**Hi Logie" Kendall said.**

**I gave him a fake smile, but didn't say anything.**

"**What happened to you?" he asked.**

"**Camille hit him" James said.**

"**Oh…wait…" Kendall started.**

**I gave him a pleading look to go with my lie. He nodded his head and got the message.**

"**Why?" he asked.**

"**She is still mad at him" James said.**

"**Oh" Kendall said rubbing his head.**

"**Are you ok?" James asked.**

"**Yeah, its just a headache" Kendall said.**

"**Hang over" James said.**

**Kendall nodded. "Yeah"**

**I put the bag of peas back in the freezer, then headed to my room. I sat on my bed and started crying. I wanted to tell James the truth, but I was afraid Kendall would hit me if he found out other people knew what he was doing to me.**

"**Logie can I talk to you"**

**I looked up to see Kendall standing by the door.**

"**Please Kendall…go away" I said while quickly wiping my tears.**

"**No Logan. He said walking over to me. I need to apologize."**

"**Kendall you don't have to" I said.**

"**Yes I do. he said sitting next to me. I did an awful thing to you"**

"**Its fine, I deser…" I started.**

"**No you don't deserve anything I do to you, I'm really sorry" he said.**

"_**Don't forgive him, he's lying" **_**I told myself.**

"**Please Logie, I wont hurt you anymore" he said grabbing my hand.**

**I looked up at him and noticed he was crying.**

**I sighed. "Please promise me you will stop"**

"**I promise" he said.**

**I nodded my head. He gave me a kiss on the lips.**

"**I love you" he said.**

"**I love you too" I said.**

**He smiled. "I guess we should clean up now"**

"**Yeah" I said. Then followed him into the living room.**

*****BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR*****

**About two weeks has passed since my incident with Kendall. And even though he promised he wouldn't hurt me, he lied to me once again. He would still hit me, but not as much. I was starting to think James and Carlos knew about it, but they didn't say anything, so I shrugged it off. I woke up feeling like shit. My head hurt and I felt sick to my stomach. I ignored it and went into the kitchen. Everyone was awake, and Mrs. Knight was making breakfast. **

**Mrs. Knight smiled. "Good morning"**

"**Morning" I said and sat down at the table next to Kendall.**

"**Are you ok honey?" Mrs. Knight asked.**

"**Yeah" I said**

"**Ok" Mrs. Knight said while placing a plate of breakfast in front of me.**

**I looked down at the plate and almost gagged. Now don't get me wrong, I love Mrs. Knights cooking. But right now eggs and bacon didn't look very appetizing.**

"**Come on boys, you have to be at the studio soon" Mrs. Knight said.**

"**Hurry up Logan" Carlos said.**

**I quickly dug into my breakfast. I almost ate half of it, but my stomach couldn't take it. I covered my mouth with my hand and dashed to the bathroom.**

**I fell to my knees and leaned over the toilet. I emptied all the contents from my stomach.**

"**Logie are you ok?" Kendall asked.**

"**I'm…I'm fine" I breathed.**

"**Are you sick?" he asked.**

"**I don't know, I mean I have been feeling pretty crappy, for the past few weeks" I said.**

"**Maybe I should let Gustavo know, we're not coming in today" Kendall said.**

"**No its fine. I said standing up. I can still go"**

"**Are you sure?"**

"**Yeah"**

"**Ok I'll let everyone know your ok" he said before leaving the bathroom.**

**I quickly rinsed my mouth out, trying to rid the awful taste. I still didn't feel good, but I had to go to rehearsal, or else. I entered the living room and sat on the couch.**

"**What's wrong with you?" Katie asked.**

"**Nothing" I said.**

**She shrugged. "Whatever"**

"**Alright lets go" Kendall said.**

**I got up and followed the guys to meet Kelly in the lobby. Once in the limo, I started feeling nauseous again. I started taking deep breaths to relax me.**

"**Are you alright Logan?" Kelly asked looking worried.**

"**Yeah" I said.**

**No one looked convinced, but they did stop asking me questions. We arrived at Rocque Records, and quickly got to work. I had difficulty singing, because every time I would open my mouth, it felt like I was going to spew everywhere. In the middle of a song I stopped singing. Kendall looked over at me, wondering why I stopped. I threw my headphones off and ran out of the booth. I barely made it to the bathroom before emptying my stomach again. Since there wasn't much in there, I ended up dry heaving instead.**

"**Shh its ok" Kendall said while rubbing soothing circles on my back.**

**After I was finished I rested my head on the toilet.**

"**I must have the flu or something" I said.**

"**Do you want me to take you to the hospital?" Kendall asked.**

"**No its fine" I said standing up.**

"**I don't like seeing you sick" he said.**

"**Tell you what, if I still feel bad during the week, you can take me" I said.**

**He nodded his head in agreement. "Can you still sing?"**

"**I think I ca…"**

**I didn't get to finish because I was throwing up again.**

"**I'd say that's a no" Kendall said.**

**I wiped my mouth and rinsed it out again.**

"**I'm gonna tell Gustavo rehearsal has been cut short today" he said.**

**I nodded and followed him back to the studio. We went back in the booth, so Kendall could tell James and Carlos what's going on.**

"**Logan are you ok?" Kelly asked over the microphone.**

**I nodded. "Yeah I'm fine"**

"**No he's not. Kendall said. He is very sick"**

"**Kendall I'm fine now" I said.**

**He turned to me. "No your not, you look awful"**

"**Kendall I'm fi…ah" I said grabbing my stomach.**

"**Logie what's wrong? Talk to me" Kendall said.**

"**Just some stomach pain, its nothing" I said.**

"**Kendall is he ok?" Kelly asked.**

"**No, we have to go home" Kendall said.**

**Gustavo looked mad, but I didn't care, I was in too much pain.**

"**Come on Logan" Kendall said leading me out of the studio.**

**James and Carlos quickly followed. Gustavo opened his mouth to yell, but Kelly shot him a dirty look before going after us. We went outside to wait for the limo. Kelly soon caught up to us. **

"**Guys the limo will be here in fifteen minutes" she said.**

"**Thanks Kelly" Kendall said.**

**She nodded. "I hope you feel better Logan"**

**I gave her a weak smile. "Thanks"**

**She turned and walked back into Rocque Records. Soon after the limo showed up to take us back to the Palm Woods. On the way back, I rested my head on Kendall's shoulder.**

"**How are you feeling?" he asked.**

"**I'm really tired" I said.**

"**When we get home, why don't you take a nap" he said.**

**I nodded and tried to stay awake for the rest of the ride. Once we were back at the Palm Woods, and in our apartment, I raced to the bathroom to puke again. Kendall was at my side instantly. He handed me a wet washcloth, which I placed on my forehead. The coolness felt good against my warm body.**

"**Come and lay down" Kendall said.**

**We went into our shared room, and I collapsed on my bed. Kendall sat next to me and started rubbing my back soothingly.**

"**I hate being sick" I said.**

"**I know, but your Logan, you will be better in no time" he said.**

**I winced and sat up quickly.**

"**What's wrong?" Kendall asked.**

"**Stomach…ah…hurts" I said.**

"**Its ok babe. Kendall said. Just lay down and try to get some rest"**

**I laid back down and was soon drifting off to sleep. I thought for sure I would be feeling better the next morning, but I only felt worse. Kendall insisted on taking me to the hospital, but I told him I was fine. I was laying on my bed, when Kendall walked in.**

"**Hey Logie, how are you feeling?" he asked.**

**I smiled. "Better, thanks"**

"**Ok, well Carlos and I are going to the park" he said.**

"**What about James?" I asked.**

"**I told him to stay here with you"**

**I nodded. "Ok, but I am feeling better, I don't need anyone right now"**

"**Well I think its best if someone was here with you" he said.**

"**Ok have fun"**

**He smiled and gave me a kiss on the forehead. "I love you, feel better"**

"**I love you too" I said.**

**He left the room and I was once again alone, well except for James who was in the other room. But sometimes I did feel alone. I tried to take a nap, but I couldn't, so I decided to get up and hang out with James.**

"**Hey, how ya feeling?" James asked as I entered the living room.**

"**Eh" I said sitting down next to him.**

**He frowned. "Still feel bad"**

"**Yeah, but for some reason I feel worse" I said.**

"**Well just take it easy, you'll be better in no time" he said.**

**I chuckled. "Kendall told me the same thing"**

**He smiled and continued going through the channels to watch something.**

"**Ok well I'm hungry. He said standing up. Do you want anything?"**

"**No thanks, I'm good" I said.**

**He shrugged and went into the kitchen. He came back a few minutes later with a bag of Doritos and started munching away. I don't know if it was the way James was eating or the smell of the cheese flavored chips, that made me want to puke. I covered my mouth from doing so.**

"**Do you want some?" James asked putting the bag right in my face.**

**I gagged and ran to the bathroom.**

"**Logan are you ok?" James called from the living room.**

**I couldn't answer him because I was puking my guts out.**

"**Logan?" James asked**

**He was at my side now.**

"**Are you ok?" he asked looking concerned.**

**When I was finished I looked up at him. "Yeah I'm fine"**

"**Dude, your sweating" he said.**

**I wiped my forehead and realized I felt kind of warm.**

**James placed his hand on my forehead. "Your burning up"**

"**I'm fine James…really" I said.**

"**Come one" he said helping me up.**

**Once I was on my feet, dizziness washed over me.**

"**J-James" I said grabbing on to his shoulder for support.**

"**Logan what's wrong?" he asked.**

"**I feel… really… dizzy" I said.**

"**That's it I'm taking you to the hospital" he said leading me out of the bathroom.**

**This time I didn't argue, just let him take me. I knew something was seriously wrong with me, and it sure as hell was no stomach flu. But I knew it was something, I just wasn't exactly sure what.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: ok now its time to live up to the rest of my summary. i know this chapter isnt really realistic, but hey its a fanfiction story, it doesnt have to be true right. anyway here is another chapter. but i did warn you, so if you think your going to hate this chapter now is your time to turn back now. those who dont care if its realistic or not please continue. enjoy.=D sorry its kinda short.**

"What's taking them so long?" I asked while sitting on the bed in one of the hospital rooms.

"Just relax dude" James said while looking through a magazine.

I was getting really impatient. I wanted to know what was wrong with me, and now. I stood up and started pacing the room.

"Logan relax, its fine" James said.

I sighed and continued walking around the room.

"Ah" I said grabbing my stomach and bending over slightly.

"What's wrong?" James asked rushing over to me.

"Just some stomach cramps" I said.

"Why don't you just lay down again" James said.

I nodded and climbed back onto the bed. About ten minutes later the doctor finally came in. She was in her late twenty's, and had red hair.

'Hello boys" she said cheerfully.

"Hi" James said.

I only smiled. She seemed really nice, but doctors still made me a little nervous. This coming from the guy who wants to become a doctor.

"I'm Courtney" she said shaking mine and James hand.

"I'm James and that's Logan" James said.

She smiled. "Those are nice names."

"Can you please tell me what's wrong with me?" I asked.

"Well I need to run a few tests first" Courtney said.

"What kind of tests?" I asked.

"I just need a blood and urine sample, nothing much" she said.

I sighed. "I'm gonna be here all day"

"It wont take that long, don't worry" she said.

After she got her samples, and sent them off to the lab. It was just me and James again. We had to wait another two hours, and she still wasn't back yet.

"Does Kendall know we're here?" I asked.

"Oh shit! I forgot to tell him" James said.

"Its fine James, I'll tell him when we get home" I said.

"Are you sure?" h asked.

"Yeah, besides I don't want him to worry" I said.

He nodded and continued going through another magazine. I would say he went through at least fifty since we've been here. The door opened and Courtney came in. but she wasnt smiling.

"What's wrong?" I asked looking a little worried.

"Nothing… just um" she said

"Just what, tell me" I said getting a little annoyed.

"I don't know how this is even possible but…"

"What is?" I asked interrupting her.

She ignored me and looked down at the clipboard in her hand. She looked really confused.

"Tell me!" I yelled.

"Logan chill" James said.

She looked up at me and sighed. "Mr. Mitchell… your pregnant"

"W-what" I said.

"I don't understand how or what caused it, but according to your test results…" Courtney started.

"How can I be pregnant? I screamed. Its not possible!"

"I know, but I will do my best to figure it out how this happened" she said.

I covered my face with my hands. "This cant be happening, your lying"

"Wait are you sure he's… you know" James said.

"I'm not a hundred percent positive, but I can give him an ultrasound" she said.

"Logan is that ok with you" James said.

I looked up at him. "I don't know"

"Mr. Mitchell it wont take long, and you can see I'm not lying" Courtney said.

I sighed. "Fine"

"Alright please follow me"

James and I stood up and followed her to a new room. Once in the other room, I sat on the bed.

"Ok please lay back and lift up your shirt" Courtney said.

I lifted up my shirt to expose my stomach. I noticed James eyes widened, I quickly looked down and realized I still had a few bruises. Great, he was going to ask me about it later.

"I am going to squeeze this gel on your stomach" Courtney said.

I shivered once the cool gel touched my skin.

"It's a little cold" she said.

"Thanks for the warning" I said coolly.

She gently pressed the transducer to my stomach, and the ultrasound screen lit up of my stomach. I want really interested in looking at the screen, I knew there was nothing in there.

I sighed. "This is stupid, I'm not preg…"

"There!" Courtney said pointing at the screen.

I sat up and looked at the screen, but didn't see much of anything.

"Where?" James asked.

"Well you can barely see anything, because its not an embryo yet, but its defiantly a baby" Courtney said.

I looked down and started crying.

"Logan are you ok?" James asked.

I shook my head, and only cried harder.

"I'll give you guys a few minutes alone" Courtney said before wiping off my stomach and leaving the room.

"Logan why are you crying?" James asked.

"I cant have a baby James" I sobbed.

"I know its impossible, but…" he trailed off looking at the floor.

"Kendall is going to hate me"

"Why would he hate you, he loves and cares about you" James said.

"Because I'm having a baby, I'm a freak of nature" said.

"But its his baby, he will be happy" he said.

"No he wont, he will hate me and this baby" I said.

"Logan everything will be fine" James said.

"I have to get rid of it"

"What, why?"

"Because I don't want to get hurt" I screamed before crying again.

"I don't understand" James said.

"Kendall beats me ok, I didn't want you to know because I was afraid…and…and" I said before choking on my sobs.

"Is that why your covered in bruises?" he asked.

I nodded my head. "Please James don't tell anyone"

"Logan we need to end this" he said.

"No James please" I pleaded.

"Logan you don't deserve all that pain, I have to confront him" James said.

"No!" I screamed.

He ignored me and pulled out his phone. I got up from the bed and tried to take his phone away.

"Logan! He yelled and grabbed me by the shoulders. I have to tell him"

I fell to my knees. "Please James don't, I will talk to him. Just please don't tell him anything…please"

He sighed and kneeled in front of me. "I wont tell him, but you have to"

I nodded and wiped some of the tears away, but they still kept flowing.

"Its ok Logan." James said pulling me into a hug. "I wont let him hurt you or the baby"

"You promise" I said into his shoulder.

"I would never lie to you" James said.

"Thank you James, you're a really good friend" I said.

"Now come on. He said helping me up. Lets go home"

I nodded and we left the hospital. I hope Kendall wont be angry and that James can keep his promise.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: sorry this chapter is really short, but i hope everyone enjoys it anyway =D**

"I cant believe I'm pregnant" I said on our way back to the Palm Woods.

"Yeah it's a little weird, but amazing" James said.

I chuckled. "It is a little weird huh"

James smiled, but kept his eyes on the road. I sighed and placed a hand over my stomach.

"Are you ok?" James asked.

"I'm just a little nervous about telling Kendall" I said.

"Its ok Logan, he will accept it" James said.

"Do I have to tell him today?" I asked.

"Yeah, I think it would be better if you did" he said.

I sighed. "I don't think I can"

James looked at me. "Logan everything will be ok, trust me"

"Ok" I said.

We finally pulled into the Palm Woods parking lot, and made our way into the lobby. We reached the door to apartment 2J, but I hesitated to open it.

"You know what I changed my mind" I said turning around to face James.

"Come on Logan, you have to do it sooner or later." James said.

"I pick later" I said.

"Oh yeah that's smart, wait until you go into labor to tell him" he said.

"You know what I mean" I said.

"Logan its now or never"

I sighed. "Fine, but if anything goes wrong…"

"Nothing will happen, and if something does, I'm here for you" James said.

"Thanks James" I said.

He smiled and opened the door to our apartment.

"Logan oh my god! Are you ok? Where were you?" Kendall asked while giving me a big hug.

"I'm fine" I said.

"Where were you? Carlos and I returned to find you and James gone" Kendall said.

"Oh that…I uh… need to talk to you" I said.

"About what?" Kendall asked.

I looked over at James and Carlos.

"Oh right" James said before dragging Carlos to their shared room.

"Aw come on, I want to know" Carlos said while being dragged away.

Once their bedroom door slammed shut, I grabbed Kendall by the hand and led him to the couch.

"Kendall the reason I'm sick is…wait is your mom here?" I said.

"No she left with Katie, why?" he said.

"Never mind…um… the reason I'm sick is because…um…I have the flu" I said.

"That's it, I thought it was something worse" Kendall said.

"No its just the flu" I said patting my stomach.

"Ok good, are you feeling better?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm just a little tired" I said.

"Why don't you take a nap" Kendall said standing up and kissing me on the forehead.

I stood up as well. "Ok"

The door to Carlos and James shared room opened, and they joined us in the living room.

"So you just have the flu, right?" Carlos said.

"Yeah" I said.

"Well I don't want to get sick, so can you keep your distance" Carlos said.

I chuckled. "Don't worry its not contagious"

Kendall and Carlos a gave me a weird and confused look.

"I mean… its not that contagious" I said.

They nodded and went into the kitchen. I was about to go to my room, but was stopped.

"Why didn't you tell him?" James hissed.

"It wasn't the right time" I whispered.

"It was the perfect time, he was in a good mood" James said.

"Don't worry I'll tell him"

"You better or I will" James said before walking away.

I sighed and went into my room. Once my head hit the pillow, I was out.

**James POV**

While Logan was asleep, I kept thinking of telling Kendall myself. But I couldn't, Logan had to. I needed to tell someone else about Logan's secret, so I decided to tell the one person I'm closest to. Carlos.

"Hey Carlos can I talk to you for a minute" I said.

"Yeah sure James" he said.

We walked into our shared room and I closed the door.

"What is it you wanted to tell me?" Carlos asked.

I took a deep breath. "Ok this is going to sound weird, but…"

"But what?"

I sighed. "Logan is… uh… pregnant"

Carlos started laughing. "Your joking, because that's hilarious"

I shook my head. "Its true"

He stopped laughing and his expression turned serious. "How? That doesn't make sense"

"I know, but the doctor said she will try and figure it out" I said.

Carlos sat on his bed. "What does Kendall think?"

I sat down next to him. "He doesn't know about it yet"

"Doesn't know, why?"

"Logan is afraid to tell him, because…"

"Because why?"

I sighed and looked down. "Because Kendall secretly beats him"

"What! Why?" Carlos asked.

"I don't know, Logan wouldn't tell me" I said.

"James we have to stop this" Carlos said standing up.

"No." I said yanking him back down to the bed. "Logan doesn't want Kendall to know that we found out about it"

"But that's awful, we need to help him" Carlos said. "He's our friend"

"I know, but if we confront Kendall, Logan will get hurt" I said.

"So your saying either way he will suffer" Carlos said.

"Yeah, but please don't tell anyone about this" I said.

He sighed. "Ok, but what can we do?"

"Try our best to keep Logan and his baby safe from Kendall" I said.

Carlos looked down. "But what if we cant"

"Don't say that, we will help him" I said wrapping my arm around Carlos's shoulder.

"I hope your right" he said.

"I am" I said.

I knew this was going to be hard, but we have to protect Logan. Even if its from the thing he loves the most.


	8. Chapter 8

"_Kendall I'm pregnant" I said._

"_What, how the hell can you be pregnant!" Kendall yelled._

"_I don't know, I guess it happened that night you…" I said._

"_Don't you dare blame this on me, this is your problem, not mine" Kendall said interrupting me._

"_But Kendall its our baby" I said._

"_That thing is not mine Logan, I want nothing to do with it or you" Kendall said before heading to the door of our room._

"_No Kendall wait" I said rushing over to him._

"_Get the fuck away from me!" he screamed and pushed me to the floor._

_I fell hard to the floor and started crying. "Please Kendall, I love you"_

"_Well I don't love you, how can anyone love a freak" Kendall said before walking out and leaving me all alone._

I gasped and woke up with a start. I quickly looked around the room. Kendall was sound asleep and snoring softly. I looked at my alarm clock, it was about one in the morning. I guess I was so tired I slept through dinner. I sighed and laid back down, but I couldn't fall back asleep. The nightmare seemed so real, I hope Kendall doesn't act like that when I tell him. But there was only one way to find out.

"Kendall" I whispered

Silence.

I got out of bed and sat on the foot of his.

"Kendall" I said again and shaking him gently.

"Hmm" he said.

"Can I talk to you?" I asked.

He opened his eyes and looked at the clock.

"Logan its one in the morning, can this wait" Kendall said.

"No I have to tell you now"

He sighed. "Go ahead"

I took a deep breath. "Kendall the truth is… I'm really…I mean…"

I stopped when I heard him snoring, he was asleep.

I sighed. "I'm pregnant"

I knew of course he didn't hear a word I just said, I guess I would have to wait to tell him. I gave him a kiss on the forehead and went back to my bed. Tomorrow I will tell him for sure. I just hope he really does accept it.

I awoke the next morning at about ten o'clock and quickly showered and dressed. I made my way into the living room to find Kendall, James and Carlos playing video games.

"Morning Logie" Kendall said

"Morning" I said sitting down next to him.

"Are you feeling better?" he asked.

"Kinda, but I still need to talk to you about something" I said.

"Can this wait Logie, I'm kinda busy here" Kendall said.

I sighed and stood up. "I guess I'll tell you later"

He ignored me and continued playing his stupid game. I went back into our shared room and slammed the door. I heard the game stop and Kendall yell.

"What the hell James!"

They started talking, but I couldn't hear what it was about. I laid down on my bed and looked down at my stomach.

I sighed. "Don't worry I'll tell Kendall, and he will love you just as much as I do"

I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in" I said.

The door opened and Kendall walked in. "Hey sorry about that, did you still want to talk?"

"Yeah sure" I said.

He came over and sat next to me.

"Ok when I tell you this, please don't hate me" I said.

He looked confused. "Hate you, why would I do that?"

"Just please promise you wont"

"Well is it something I will get angry for"

"Um I hope not" I said looking down.

"Your cheating on me"

"What?" I asked looking up at him.

"I bet that's it, right?" he said standing up.

"No, that's not it at all"

His eyes filled up with anger. "Your lying, I can believe you would do something like that"

"No Kendall I swear that's not it" I said standing up to face him.

"YOUR FUCKING LYING!" he yelled.

"NO I'M NOT!" I yelled back

"THEN WHAT IS IT?" he yelled and grabbing me by the shoulders.

"I'M PREGNANT!" I screamed.

He let me go and I collapsed on my bed, and started crying.

"Your what?" he asked.

I ignored him and continued to cry.

"Logie… I didn't… is this true" he said sitting down next me.

"Yeah it is" I sniffed.

"But how, you're a guy"

"I know, it doesn't make sense"

He sighed. "Are you sure its mine?"

I punched him in the arm. "Of course its yours you idiot"

"Ow Logan, that hurt" he said grabbing his arm.

"Well don't say stupid things" I said.

"So are you…I mean we keeping it" he asked.

"I wanted to, but if you don't want it, I can always get an abortion" I said.

"No I want it"

"Really?"

"Of course I do, I mean its my baby too" he said.

I smiled. "So your ok with all this"

"Yes, I couldn't be happier" he said before kissing me on the lips.

"I love you" I said once we pulled apart.

"I love you too" he said.

I smiled and looked down at my stomach.

"Don't worry Logan, I love him too" Kendall said while placing his hand on my stomach.

"Him? How do you know it's a boy?" I asked.

"Well its has to be, I want someone to teach hockey to" he said.

"What if it's a girl?" I asked.

"Then we have a problem"

I chuckled. "I don't think it really matters"

"Yeah, but I want a boy"

"Well you cant always get what you want"

"Watch me" he said pulling me close.

I smiled and gave him a kiss.

"So did you want to tell Carlos" Kendall asked.

"Nah, I bet James already told him" I said.

"Ok" he said getting up from my bed.

I stood up as well. "Now what?"

"Hmm, you up for some video games" he said.

"Sure" I said.

We headed back into the living room and I sat down next to James.

"See was that so hard" James whispered in my ear.

"No I guess not, but I'm glad he's happy about it" I whispered back.

"I told ya" James said.

"I never doubted you for a second" I said.

He smiled and continued playing his game. I didn't feel like playing, so I just sat back and watched. I was so happy and relieved Kendall didn't hate me or the baby, it wasn't at all like my nightmare. Kendall was happy, so I was happy. And that's all that really matters.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: to me this chapter really sucks, its a filler chapter so yeah. anyway hope you enjoy, i will try my best to update later tonight. =D**

Its been a month since I found out about my unexplained pregnancy. Everyone seemed fine with it, well except the people I didn't tell, which was everyone else but my friends. I was sitting on the couch reading quietly, while Kendall was passed out next to me.

"Psst Logan"

I looked up from my book and saw James sticking his head out from his room.

"What?" I asked.

"Come here" he whispered.

I rolled my eyes and set my book down. I wasn't really in the mood to deal with James at the moment. I wasn't really in the mood to deal with anyone actually. I got up and went into James and Carlos's shared room.

"Ok what" I said crossing my arms over my chest.

"How are you?" James asked.

"Oh I'm fantastic. My back is killing me, I throw up all the time and my emotions are out of control" I said.

James rolled his eyes. "I meant with Kendall"

"We're fine" I said.

"Has he…hurt you in anyway?" James asked.

"Just by knocking me up" I said.

"Logan I'm being serious, has he hurt you physically"

"No he hasn't touched me"

"Are you sure?"

"James if he did I would tell you'' I said.

"You promise" he said.

"Yes, and stop worrying about me"

"Logan I cant help it, it just pisses me off what Kendall does to you"

"Don't worry, besides I think he stopped for good" I said.

"What makes you think that?" James asked.

"I don't know, I guess since I'm carrying his child, he's changed"

James sighed. "I hope your right"

"James I'm fine, well sort of" I said.

"Ok but if he touches you, I swear I'll…uh…do something bad" James said.

I chuckled. "Ok James you do that"

He smiled. "So are you doing ok"

"Yeah I guess, I mean I've been better" I said.

"I'm sorry man" James said.

I sighed. "Its fine"

"Are you sure your ok?"

I sat down on the edge Of James bed and put my head in my hands.

"Logan?" James asked sitting next to me.

"I'm fine" I said.

"No your not"

I started crying. He was right I wasn't fine, I was terrified about this whole thing.

"Logan don't cry" James said wrapping his arms around me.

"I-I cant help it" I said.

"Logan everything will be ok"

I buried my head into his chest and cried harder.

"What's going on?"

We looked up to see Kendall standing in the doorway, and we instantly pulled apart.

"Hormones" I said wiping my eyes.

Kendall furrowed his brows. "Okay? But I think I can take it from here"

James nodded and left the room. Kendall came over and sat next to me.

"Logie what's really going on?"

"I'm just scared I guess" I said.

"Don't be, I'm here for you" he said.

"I know but what if along the way you…"

He gently grabbed me by the shoulders and turned me to face him.

"I wont, you're the only one for me" Kendall said.

I nodded and more tears came to my eyes.

He pulled me into a hug. "Logie I love you and always will"

"I love you too" I said.

"Please don't cry anymore" he said.

"I'll try not to"

"Try?"

"Well sometimes its not my fault, but would you rather see me crying or yelling" I said.

He chuckled. "Neither"

"Ahem"

We looked and saw James leaning against the doorway.

"Yeah James" Kendall said.

"Can I have my room back?" James asked.

Kendall and I laughed and stood up from James bed.

"Sorry" I said on our way out.

"Its all good" James said.

Once we were out of his room, I laid down on the couch.

"So when do you need to go back to the hospital?" Kendall asked while sitting down next to me.

"Uh I don't know, I have to make an appointment" I said.

"Why don't you make one?" he asked.

"I haven't had time I guess, did you want me to?"

"Yeah because I want to go with you this time" Kendall said.

I smiled. "Then I'll make one"

"Ok" he said reaching for the remote.

I got up and went into our shared room and pulled out my cell phone. I called the hospital.

***BTR****BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR**

_(next day)_

"Hurry up Kendall or we're going to be late" I said from the living room.

"Hold on Logie" Kendall yelled from our room.

I rolled my eyes. "I have been for the past fifteen minutes."

"Where are you guys going?" Carlos asked.

"I have a doctors appointment, and Kendall is taking forever" I said.

"Can I go?" Carlos asked.

"Actually Carlos I was hoping to spend today with Logan" Kendall said walking into the living room.

"Oh ok I understand, I'll wait in the car then" Carlos said.

"I think Kendall means he wants to spend time with Logan alone" James said.

Carlos sighed. "Oh"

"Don't worry Carlos, you can hang with me" James said.

"Yeah ok, see you guys later" Carlos said before walking into his room with James.

I turned to Kendall. "You ready to go"

"Yeah come on" he said.

We finally made our way to the hospital, and I signed myself in. We waited in the waiting room, and I began to feel queasy. So I took some deep breaths to relax me.

"Are you ok Logie?" Kendall asked.

"Yeah I just feel a little nauseous" I said.

"Just relax ok"

I nodded. "Ok"

"Logan Mitchell"

I looked up to see a nurse waiting for me. Kendall and I stood up to follow her to a room.

"Your doctor will be with you shortly" the nurse said before walking out.

I climbed up on the bed, while Kendall took a seat in the chair next to me. I winced and grabbed my stomach.

"Still feel sick" Kendall said.

"A little, but now I have stomach cramps" I said.

"Just hang in there Logie, only eight months left" he said.

"That doesn't make me feel any better" I said.

"Sorry"

"Its fine, I just hate this"

"Maybe if you lay down, you'll feel better" Kendall said.

I laid back on the bed and tried to relax. Luckily Kendall was there to comfort me. After a few minutes the door opened and Courtney came in.

"Hello Logan" she said cheerfully.

I sat up and smiled. "Hi"

"So back for check up I see" she said.

"Yeah"

"Ahem"

"Oh right, this is Kendall" I said.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Courtney"

Kendall smiled and shook her hand politely.

"Ok so today I am going to give you a quick ultrasound" Courtney said.

I laid back down and lifted up my shirt. She squeezed the blue gel on my stomach, and I flinched from the coolness. She gently pressed the transducer to my lower abdomen and moved it around till she found the spot she was looking for.

"Ok there is your baby" she said pointing at it.

I looked over at Kendall, his eyes were glued to the screen.

"Wow" he said in amazement.

I smiled and felt tears come to my eyes. Kendall grabbed my hand and rubbed my knuckles with his thumb.

"Ok everything is looking good" Courtney said

"When will we be able to find out the gender?" I asked.

"I would say in your third or fourth month" she said.

"Ok and what should I be looking forward to?" I asked.

"Nothing much, you will still have morning sickness and some aches. Your body will be really tired from all the changes, so make sure you get plenty of rest" Courtney said.

"That's not so bad" Kendall said.

"That's what you think, its really awful" I said.

"Don't worry Logan, everything will be fine if you take it easy" Courtney said.

"That's what I've been telling him" Kendall said.

Courtney laughed. "Well I'm glad you care about Logan"

Kendall smiled and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

"Well I think that's all for today" Courtney said while turning off the machine.

"Wait really" Kendall said.

"Yes but you can come back in a few weeks for another update" she said.

"Ok" I said sitting up and wiping the gel off my stomach.

"Well it was nice meeting you Kendall" Courtney said.

"Nice meeting you too" Kendall said while shaking her hand again.

"And remember Logan, take it easy" Courtney said before leaving the room.

"So what did you think?" I asked.

"It was really cool, but still a little strange" Kendall said.

"Why was it strange?" I asked.

"Because there is someone growing inside you" he said.

I chuckled and patted my stomach. "Yeah it is kinda weird"

"I cant wait for the baby to be born" Kendall said.

"Your that excited huh" I said.

"Hell yeah, think of all the things we get to do" he said.

I smiled and gave him a kiss on the lips. "I'm glad your happy about this"

"You ready to go home" Kendall said.

"Yeah lets go" I said.

He grabbed my hand and we left the hospital. I was so tired I slept on the way back. Once we entered apartment 2J, I decided to take a nap. Carlos and James would have to wait till later, to find out what's going on with the baby.


	10. Chapter 10

I woke up from my nap and felt like I was going to puke. I took a few deep breaths, but once again it didn't work. I jumped out of bed and ran into the bathroom and spent the next ten minutes throwing up. When I was finished I rinsed my mouth out and went into the living room. Katie and Kendall were watching TV, James and Carlos were playing dome hockey and Mrs. Knight was making dinner. I sat down next to Kendall and placed my head in my hands.

"Are you ok Logie?" Kendall asked.

"Yeah just the throwing up is getting annoying" I said

He frowned. "I'm sorry, how long is it supposed to last?"

"I don't now, maybe a few more weeks" I said.

"Your still sick?" Katie asked

I looked up at her. "Sort of"

"But its been what a month, shouldn't you be better by now" she said.

Carlos laughed. "He wont be better for another eight months"

"Eight months?" Katie asked.

Carlos walked over to the couch and leaned behind it. "Yeah, he's pregnant"

"LOGAN'S PREGNANT!" Katie yelled.

Just then we heard glass shatter in the kitchen.

"Mom are you ok?" Kendall asked while running into the kitchen.

"I'm fine honey, just dropped a plate" Mrs. Knight said.

I glared at Carlos and James smacked him upside the head.

"Ow, what was that for?" Carlos asked.

"You weren't supposed to say anything" James said.

"Oops, my bad" Carlos said.

"Wait are you really pregnant?" Katie asked.

"Of course he's not honey, its impossible" Mrs. Knight said while walking into the living room and sitting down on the loveseat.

I sighed and covered my face with my hands again.

"Logan lets just tell them" Kendall said sitting down next to me.

"Tell us what?" Mrs. Knight asked.

"I know this is going to sound a little weird…but Logan is pregnant" Kendall said.

It was silent for a moment until Katie broke the awkward silence.

"That's weird" Katie said.

"Katie shut up" Kendall said.

"What cant I have my own opinion" she said.

"No" Kendall said.

She rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to the TV.

"Mom are you alright?" Kendall said

Mrs. Knight didn't say anything, just looked really shocked

"Mom, hello" Kendall said waving his hand in front of her face.

"Huh? What's going on?" Mrs. Knight asked.

"Are you ok?" Kendall asked.

"Yeah I'm fine" she said.

"So your ok with Logan and I having a baby" Kendall said.

"Kendall its not funny to joke about some thing that" she said.

"But it's the truth" Kendall said.

"Honey guys cant get pregnant" Mrs. Knight said.

Katie laughed. "Then that makes Logan a girl"

"Shut up" Kendall said smacking Katie in the head.

"Ow don't hit me" Katie said before punching Kendall in the arm.

"You little brat" Kendall said.

"You're a jerk" Katie said.

Kendall was about to launch himself at Katie, but was stopped.

"Enough!" Mrs. Knight yelled.

Kendall and Katie stopped fighting and turned their attention back to their mom.

"Logan what is really going on?" Mrs. Knight asked.

I sighed. "I really am pregnant"

"Logan you don't have to go along with Kendall's joke, please tell me the truth" she said.

"Mrs. Knight he really is" James said.

"Not you too" she said.

"He's telling the truth mama Knight" I said.

"But you being pregnant is impossible" Mrs. Knight said.

"Yeah I know, but I really am" I said.

"James even took him to the hospital, and the doctor said he was" Carlos said.

"And I saw the baby today at his ultrasound" Kendall added.

"Aww was it cute?" Carlos asked.

"Well it was really small, but yeah I guess you could say it was" Kendall said.

"I want to go and see it" Carlos said.

"Well maybe next ti…" Kendall started.

"Guys focus" I snapped.

"Gees take a chill pill" Carlos said.

"Please Mrs. Knight you have to believe me" I said

She sighed and gave me a hug. "I believe you"

"Really?" I asked.

"Yes, but I wish I knew how it happened" she said.

"You guys probably had sex" Katie said.

"Katie go to your room" Mrs. Knight said.

"But mom" Katie whined.

"Fine you can stay if you don't say anymore rude or sarcastic comments" Mrs. Knight said.

Katie nodded and continued watching TV.

"Ok since you guys have had sex, you must now deal with the consequences of doing so" Mrs. Knight said.

"Mom we'll be fine" Kendall said.

"Well I hope your doing it correctly, I don't want you hurting Logan or anything" she said.

"I'm out" Katie said before turning off the TV and going into her room.

"You did that on purpose didn't you" Kendall said.

Mrs. Knight chuckled. "Yes I did"

"Ok but please lets not have that talk again" Kendall said.

"Fine, but what are your plans for all this?" she asked.

"Well we decided we're keeping it" Kendall said.

"Can you handle taking care of a baby?" Mrs. Knight asked.

"Yeah I think we can" Kendall said.

"But if we need help can you maybe help us" I said.

"Of course I'll help you, I don't expect you guys to know how to do everything" she said.

I smiled. "Thanks mama Knight"

"Anytime, but does Gustavo and Kelly know about this?" Mrs. Knight asked

"Uh…not exactly" Kendall said.

"Then I guess you better tell them" she said before walking back into the kitchen.

"Their gonna kill us" I said.

"No they wont" Kendall said wrapping his arm around me.

Carlos and James laughed. "Yeah they will" James said.

"Oh god" I said.

"Don't worry Logie, everything will be ok" Kendall said.

"You promise"

"I promise"

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR****BTR**

"YOUR WHAT!" Gustavo yelled.

"I'm pregnant" I squeaked

"HOW CAN YOU BE PREGNANT?" Gustavo yelled.

"I don't know, it just happened" I said.

"But its impos…" Kelly started.

"Impossible I know" I said.

I was getting really tired of people telling me that.

Kelly sighed. "What are you going to do?"

"We're keeping it" Kendall said.

"No, there is no way your keeping that…that thing" Gustavo said pointing at my stomach.

"Why its our kid, we get to call the shots, not you" Kendall said.

"You don't get to call anything, I do and I say you get rid of it" Gustavo said.

"And if we don't" Kendall said.

"Well you can say good bye to Big Time Rush" Gustavo said.

James shrieked. "What do you mean?"

"Well your fans aren't going to be…very…uh…" Kelly started.

"Accepting" Kendall said.

"Some of them might, but it's a little weird that Logan is pregnant" Kelly said.

I sighed. "Then what do I do?"

"GET RID OF IT!" Gustavo yelled.

"You could or wait till its born and put it up for adoption" Kelly said.

"But…but I love my baby" I said placing my hand over my stomach.

"Aww Logan, we'll think of something" Kelly said giving me a hug.

"This is just fucked up" Kendall said.

"Why cant you guys hide it for a little while?" Carlos asked

"Yeah until you guys think of a plan" James said.

"That could work, I mean I'm not even showing yet" I said.

"When do you start showing?" James asked.

"Uh maybe around three or four months" I said.

"And your only a month now, so that gives us enough time to come up with a plan" Kendall said.

"I think getting rid of it would be easier" Gustavo said.

Kelly shot him a dirty look. "But we have to make sure no one finds out about this, ok"

We all nodded our heads in agreement.

Gustavo started rubbing his forehead. "You dogs are dismissed"

We quickly ran out of Rocque Records and down to the limo.

"See things aren't going to be so bad" Carlos said once we were all in the limo.

"I hope your right Carlito's" Kendall said.

"Do you think our fans are going to hate us?" I asked.

"Well maybe a few might, but we would still have the other half that wouldn't mind and still love us" Kendall said

"Who knew getting pregnant would cause so much trouble" I said.

"I guess that's what my mom meant about consequences for our actions" Kendall said.

I sighed. "But you know its only going to get worse"

"True, but we'll be together to handle it all" Kendall said.

"Thanks Kendall" I said before giving him a peck on the lips.

"No problem Logie" he said once we pulled apart.

"So have you guys thought of any names?" Carlos asked.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: ok i kinda have a feeling that you guys lost intrest in my story or you dont like it. thats totally fine, but if no one likes it i will delete it and try something else, but if it is still liked i guess i will keep it up. i dont really like this story that much, and i know its boring but it will get better. but i will only finish it if ppl want me to, if not i will delete it.**

The next morning I awoke to the sound of my alarm clock going off. Kendall groaned and rolled over to face the wall. I shut off the clock and headed into the bathroom. When I was ready for the day, I went into the kitchen. For some odd reason I was craving pickles and ice cream. I started going through the fridge, and found the jar of pickles. I grabbed a bowl and filled it with chocolate ice cream. Once I had my weird breakfast I sat down on the couch and munched away.

"Morning Logie" Kendall said as he walked into the living room and sat next to me.

I smiled. "Hey"

"What are you eating?" he asked.

"Um pickles and ice cream" I said before taking another bite.

"That is so gross" he said.

"Actually its pretty good, do you want some?" I said

He gagged. "I'll pass"

I chuckled. "Its really not that bad"

"I think its gross, anyway how long are you going to be eating like that?" Kendall said.

"I don't know, probably the whole pregnancy" I said.

Kendall sighed and stood up from the couch.

"Are you mad?" I asked.

"No…its…" he started.

"Cause I can stop eating weird things if you want" I said.

"No Logie its not that, its…" he trailed off.

"Is it because I'm gonna get fat, then you'll leave me" I said with tears in my eyes.

"Logie I would never leave you, I love you" Kendall said.

"Then what's bothering you?" I asked.

"Its just… I don't know, I 'm a little scared" he said.

This kind of shocked me. Kendall wasn't really afraid of anything, and if he was he was good at hiding it. But I guess even the strongest leaders get scared.

I stood up and gave him a hug. "Kendall I'm scared too, but when can do this"

He sighed. "I know, but I'm also scared for the baby. What if no one likes him or her because he or she has two dads or something. You know how people are, they like to judge."

"Kendall everything is going to be ok, and no one is going to judge our baby" I said.

"Yeah I guess your right" he said.

I gave him a peck on the lips, but the kiss soon got heated. Kendall gently pushed me on the couch, our lips never separating. He started sucking my neck as I ran my fingers through his hair.

"We can still have sex right?" Kendall asked.

I chuckled. "Yeah, but I don't know about later on when I start getting bigger"

He smiled. "I would fuck you regardless"

I blushed a bright red, but pulled him back for more. Kendall positioned himself between my legs.

"Oh god, I did not need to see that"

We stopped and looked up to see James covering his eyes.

"Can you guys dry hump somewhere else?" James asked.

"We were not doing that" Kendall said as he sat up.

"But you were going to" James said removing his hand from his eyes.

I rolled my eyes and got up from the couch.

"Thanks James for ruining everything" Kendall said.

"What did James ruin?" Carlos asked while walking into the living room.

"My make out session with Logan" Kendall said.

"Yeah right, you guys were freaking dry humping" James said.

Carlos made a face of disgust. "Isn't that what got you guys into this situation"

"Well yeah… but we know how to control ourselves" I said.

"Sure you can" James said.

I rolled my eyes for the second time as James and Carlos started laughing.

"Anyway I'm going to the pool" Kendall said and standing up from the couch.

"I'm in, let me just change" James said before running off to his room.

"Me too" Carlos said and ran after James.

"You coming?" Kendall asked.

"Nah I'm gonna stay here" I said.

"What are you going to do?" he asked.

"Um I guess I could start thinking of baby names" I said.

Kendall chuckled. "Ok have fun"

I smiled and watched as he walked into our shared room. A few minutes later he came back and was ready to go.

"I'll see ya later Logie" he said before giving me a kiss on the forehead.

"Ok bye" I said.

The guys left and it was just me, or so I thought.

"Hey where is everyone?" Katie asked

"They went down to the pool" I said.

"Oh I guess I'll go down there too" she said heading for the door.

"Bye" I said.

"Oh and Logan, please don't be dry humping Kendall on the couch, I sit there" Katie said.

"Psh I wasn't… doing that" I said turning red.

She rolled her eyes. "What ever"

After Katie left, I went into Kendall and my room and pulled out a note book and pen. I might as well think of some names while I was alone to think. I separated the paper into two columns, one side for boys names and the other for girls. I couldn't think of anything.

"_This is a lot harder then it looks" _I thought.

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR

"Hey Kendall how was the pool?" I asked as Kendall walked into our room a few hours later.

"It was fun, how was picking out names?" he asked.

"Really hard, but I did come up with a few." I said.

"Cool, what are they?" Kendall asked as he sat down next to me.

"Ok what do you think of the name Madison for a girl?" I asked.

"Its cute, but what if it's a boy?' he asked.

"I kinda liked the name Nolan"

"Not bad, any others?"

"Yeah I also picked Evelyn for a girl and Aidan for a boy" I said.

"Hmm their cute" Kendall said.

"Oh god, you hate them don't you" I said.

"No Logie, their fine"

"But I don't want fine, I want great" I said.

"Don't worry Logie, we have plenty of time to think of names" Kendall said.

"Yeah I guess, but I wanted to be prepared" I said.

He chuckled. "Don't worry we'll be fine"

I sighed. "Ok"

"Lets go join James and Carlos" he said standing up.

I nodded and grabbed his hand. "Are you sure you don't like the names I picked out?"

Kendall chuckled but didn't say anything.

"Wait is that a yes"

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***

The next day after rehearsals, I decided to go to the mall.

"Hey Kendall" I said.

Kendall looked up the TV show he was watching, and smiled. "Hey Logie, what's up?"

"Well I'm going to the mall for a few hours, do you wanna come?" I asked.

"Sorry Logie I have plans" he said.

"Oh"

He opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by James.

"I'll go with you" James said while putting his arm around me.

"But I was going to look at baby stuff" I said looking at Kendall.

"I'm really sorry Logie, but I already made plans" Kendall said standing up.

I sighed. "I guess its ok, maybe another time"

Kendall pulled me into a hug. "I am really sorry, how about this weekend?"

"Ok" I said as he let go.

"Don't be sad, besides I bet James would be better at helping you shop for the baby then me" Kendall said.

"Yeah I guess, but I really wanted you to go" I said.

"Logan cheer up, and Kendall's right I would be a better at helping you then him" James said.

"Ok you can come with me" I said.

"Ok let me just get something" James said before running off to his room.

"Well I better get going, I'll see ya later" Kendall said before giving me a kiss on the lips.

"Ok bye" I said.

He smiled then left the apartment. I let out a long sigh.

"You ok Logan?" James asked as he entered the living room.

"Yeah, I just wish I knew where he was going" I said.

"Logan chill, he is probably going down to the pool" James said.

"Yeah your right" I said.

"I know, now come on" James said.

When we reached the lobby, I made sure to check the pool for Kendall. He wasn't there. I tried not to worry about it, but I had a strange feeling Kendall was lying to me.


	12. Chapter 12

"Hey James thanks for coming with me" I said as we made our way back to apartment 2J.

"No problem, it was actually kinda fun" James said.

I smiled. "It was, besides we never hang out together that much"

He smiled and opened the door to our apartment. Carlos was watching TV, but looked up when we walked in.

"Hey guys, how was the mall?" Carlos asked.

"It was good, I found a lot of stuff for the baby" I said.

"Where's Kendall?" James asked.

"I thought he was with you" Carlos said.

I sighed and sat down next to Carlos.

"So that's a no" Carlos said.

"He was supposed to go, but he had plans" James said.

"Oh that sucks, I'm sorry man" Carlos said.

"Its fine, he promised on Saturday" I said.

"Where is Kendall anyway?" James asked.

"I don't know, I thought he left with you guys" Carlos said.

"He wasn't at the pool?" I asked.

"I went down to the pool a few hours ago, and he wasn't there" Carlos said.

"So he lied to me" I said.

"Kendall wouldn't lie to you, he probably went to a movie or something" James said.

"Why would he go to a movie alone?" Carlos asked.

"Maybe he wasn't alone" I said.

"Logan there is no way he would cheat on you, its not like him" James said.

"But what if he is, maybe he doesn't feel the same way about me anymore" I said.

"You cant worry about it, I bet he went to the park or something" James said

"But I just have this strange feeling that he is cheating on me" I said

"Nah Kendall isn't like that" Carlos said.

"Yeah but what if…"

"Logan don't stress out about this, its not good for you or the baby" James said.

I sighed. "Maybe he isn't then"

"Watch he will be here any minute, and you have nothing to worry about" James said.

Just then the front door opened and Kendall walked in. "Hey what's up?"

"Nothing we just got back from the mall" James said

"Oh how was it?" Kendall asked.

"Fine, we found some stuff for the baby" I said.

"I wish I could've gone, but I had things to do" Kendall said.

"What kind of things?" I asked.

"Just some things, nothing to worry about Logie" Kendall said before giving me a kiss on the forehead and walking into our shared room.

I sighed. "Explain that then"

"Logan, I don't…. ***sigh*** I don't know man" James said.

"Maybe it's a surprise for you or something" Carlos said.

"I doubt it" I said.

"You could trying talking to him about it" Carlos said.

"No I'll… I'll think of something" I said standing up from the couch.

"I guess you just have to trust him, trust is important in a relationship" James said

"Fine I'll forget about the whole thing" I said.

"Just think you have all day Saturday to spend time with him" James said.

"Yeah just relax and think of that" Carlos said.

I smiled. "You guys are right, I just need to relax and not jump to conclusions"

"There ya go, now come on lets watch TV" Carlos said.

"Sorry guys, I kinda wanted to show Kendall the stuff I bought" I said

"Your loss" James said.

I went into mine and Kendall's room. He was laying on his bed and facing the wall. I gently placed my stuff on my bed.

"Hey Logie" Kendall said.

"Oh sorry, did I wake you?" I asked.

"No I was just thinking" he said.

"About what?"

"Just some things"

"Did you want to talk about it?" I asked.

"Nah its fine, so what did you buy?" Kendall said.

"Just a few things for the baby, I didn't buy much since I don't know what we're having" I said.

"Well I'll help you on Saturday" Kendall said.

I smiled and sat next to him on his bed. He pulled me close and I snuggled into his chest. Our little moment was interrupted by my phone ringing. I groaned and answered it.

"Hello?"

"_May I speak to Mr. Mitchell"_

"This is him"

"_Hello Logan, this is Courtney"_

"Hi, is something wrong?" I asked.

"_No everything is fine, but would it be alright if you came in for another check up" _

"Yeah that's fine, just let me know when" I said.

"_How does Saturday sound, at about four thirty" _

I sighed. "I guess that's alright"

"_If that time doesn't work, we can reschedule"_

"No its fine, this is far more important anyway"

"_Ok then I'll see you then, have a nice day"_

"Alright you too, bye" I said.

"Who was that?" Kendall asked

"It was Courtney, she wants us to come in on Saturday" I said.

"Does that mean our plans are ruined?" Kendall asked.

"We could hang out in the morning and then go to the appointment" I said.

"Yeah that's fine, what time do we need to be there?"

"About four thirty"

"Ok that works" Kendall said.

I yawned. "Yeah"

"Why don't you take a nap?" he asked.

"Nah I'm fine"

"Logie, remember what Courtney said"

"Umm…."

"To get plenty of rest" Kendall said.

I yawned again. "Oh yeah"

Kendall rolled his eyes and pulled me back to bed with him. He was so warm and comfy, I couldn't help but snuggle into his arms. He started playing with my hair, and I could feel myself drifting off to sleep.

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***

On Saturday morning I thought for sure I could sleep in, since we didn't have to be in the studio today. But I was wrong. My phone rang, I groaned and reached for it.

"Hello" I said sleepily.

_"Logan its Kelly, Gustavo wants you guys to come in today"_

I yawned. "But its Saturday"

_"I know but Gustavo just wants to work on a few songs, it wont take that long"_

I sighed. "Ok we'll be there at…."

_"Nine"_

"Nine it is"

_"Bye"_

"Mhm"

I closed my phone and got out of bed. I took a quick shower. When I was finished and dressed, I went back into my room. Kendall was still asleep, so I decided to wake him up. I quietly made my way to his bed and climbed on top of him. I pressed my lips to his and kissed him gently.

"Mmm" he moaned.

I kissed him for a few more seconds, then pulled back.

"Why did you stop?" Kendall asked.

"Because its time to get up" I said

He groaned. "But its too early"

"Well we have to be at the studio in half an hour"

"I thought we're off today"

"I know but Gustavo wants us there today"

"But what about us hanging out today" Kendall asked

"I guess we're gonna have to wait, except for the appointment" I said.

"Fine, even though I wanted to spend today with you" he said

"I know but we can later, now come on get up" I said before giving him a quick kiss.

Gustavo didn't make us work that hard, but it still took up our whole morning. When we got back to the apartment, I wanted to sleep so bad. But I had another doctors appointment soon, so sleeping was out of the question.

"Hey Logie, I'm gonna go down to the pull" Kendall said

I looked at the clock. "But its three thirty"

"Yeah so"

I rolled my eyes. "We have to leave in half an hour for my appointment"

"I know, I'll be back in time" he said.

"You better" I said coolly

"Logie don't worry"

"I just don't want you to miss this, its important" I said

He gave me a kiss on the forehead. "I promise I wont"

I sighed. "Fine, go ahead"

He smiled and left the apartment. Even though I was supposed to trust him, I had that strange feeling that I couldn't.


	13. Chapter 13

At about four o'clock, Kendall want back yet. I started pacing the living room nervously. By 4:10 I texted and called him, but nothing. I gave up after five minutes. Just then the door opened and James and Carlos walked in.

"Hey Logan" James said

"Hey" I said

"Didn't you have an appointment?" Carlos asked

"I still do" I said

"Then why are you still here?" Carlos asked

"I'm waiting for Kendall"

James sighed. "He left again"

"Yup"

"Then can we go with you?" Carlos asked

"Yeah why not" I said

"Yay! I wanted to see the baby anyway" Carlos said

I smiled. "Then we better get a move on"

We left the apartment and once again I checked for Kendall, but like last time he wasn't there. I guess I'll have to deal with him later. When we arrived at the hospital, I signed myself in then we waited in the waiting room.

"How long do you have to wait?" Carlos asked

"It depends, but it doesn't seem so busy today" I said

Carlos sighed. "Then what do you do?"

"I read magazines, it helps pass the time" James said while looking through a fashion magazine.

Carlos shrugged and picked up a sports magazine. About fifteen minutes later, my name was finally called back.

"This is so exciting" Carlos said as we entered a room.

I smiled and climbed on the bed. Courtney wasn't here yet, so we had to wait a little longer.

"Hey Logan, how many months are you?" carlos asked while looking at a poster.

"About a month" I said

"Oh"

"Why?"

"Just wondering" carlos said

The door to my room opened and Courtney walked in. "Hello Logan, James"

"Hi" I said

"And who is this?" Courtney said looking at Carlos

"Oh this is our friend Carlos, he really wanted to come today" I said

"Well its nice to meet you" Courtney said while shaking Carlos's hand.

Carlos smiled. "You too"

"I cant help but notice Kendall isn't here" Courtney said

"Yeah he was apparently to busy for this" I said

Courtney frowned. "That's too bad, but at least you have your friends"

I smiled. "That's true"

"Do we get to see the baby?" Carlos asked excitedly.

"I'm sorry Carlos, this appointment was to see how Logan was doing" Courtney said

Carlos sighed and looked down.

"Unless Logan doesn't mind a quick ultrasound" Courtney said

Carlos looked up at me. "Oh please Logan, I really want to see"

I rolled my eyes. "Fine"

"Thank you thank you" Carlos said

I lifted up my shirt and Courtney squeezed the cool gel on my stomach. She turned the machine on and pressed the transducer to my lower abdomen.

"I don't see anything" Carlos said

Courtney moved the transducer a little to the right.

"Do you see it now?" Courtney asked

"Is it that small thingy?" Carlos asked while pointing at the screen

Courtney laughed. "Yup that's it"

"Its so weird" Carlos said

"Gee thanks" I said

"No I mean in a good way, it's a good weird thingy" Carlos said

I rolled my eyes. "Are you finished?"

"Yeah I'm good" Carlos said

Courtney wiped the gel off my stomach and turned off the machine.

"So Mr. Mitchell, do you have any questions?" Courtney asked

Carlos raised his hand. "Uh I do"

"Ok and what is your question" Courtney said

"How will the baby come out?" Carlos asked

"Good question, most likely a C-section" Courtney said

"Will it hurt?" Carlos asked

"No not at all, we will give Logan some medication so he doesn't feel a thing"

"Ok good" Carlos said

"Is there any other questions?" Courtney asked

I shook my head. "Not at the moment"

"Hey Logan, you should ask her if you can still have sex" Carlos whispered loudly.

"Carlos shut up" I said

"Really dude, did you have to say that" James said

"I don't know I guess" Carlos said

Courtney laughed. "That's also a good question, yes Logan you can still have sex, but you just have to be careful"

"I doubt it, have you seen the way Logan and Kendall…"

James quickly cupped Carlos's mouth. "I don't think she needs to know that"

Courtney laughed again. "Anyway I think it would be alright if you came back in a month and a half"

"That long" I said

"Yes since everything is going good, I think you will be fine until then"

I nodded and got off the bed. "Thank you"

"Your very welcome, and it was nice meeting you Carlos" Courtney said

Carlos smiled. "It was nice meeting you too"

"I will see you in a month, take care" she said before exiting the room.

"She is really nice" Carlos said

I smiled. "Yeah she is"

"Hey Logan, has Kendall called at all?" James asked

I pulled out my phone and checked. "Nope"

"Maybe he lost track of the time or something" Carlos said

"No he just doesn't care" I said

"Yes he does Logan, he was just busy" James said

"He was going to the pool, he wasn't that busy. He doesn't care" I said

Carlos and James didn't say anything. I wondered if they were thinking the same thing I was. That maybe it was a possibility that Kendall was cheating on me.

"Lets just go" I said

The ride back to the Palm Woods was silent. I thought for sure Carlos would ask a million questions about the baby or something, but he didn't. He sat silently in the backseat looking out the window. James didn't say anything either, he too was staring out the window of the passenger side. When we arrived at our apartment, Kendall still wasn't back yet. I looked at the clock, it was 6:30. Mrs. Knight left a note saying she went to pick up dinner with Katie. I was still tired so I went into my room to take a nap. I slammed the door and fell asleep. Not even an hour later, I heard the front door open.

"_Its probably Mrs. Knight and Katie"_ I thought.

I rolled over and tried to fall back asleep, but my bedroom door opened and someone walked in. I pretended to be asleep so whoever it was would go away. I felt someone kiss me on the head, and I realized it was Kendall. I turned over to face him.

"Sorry did I wake you Logie?" Kendall asked

"Yeah, where were you today?" I asked

"It doesn't matter" he said

"Yes it does, you missed my appointment" I snapped

"Logan chill, I didn't mean to"

"Then where were you?"

"I was out ok, but I'm back now so its fine" he said before leaning in to give me a kiss.

I quickly dodged the kiss. "Kendall its not fine, you broke your promise"

He sighed. "Logie I said I was sorry"

"But you say that all the time, why is it any different now?" I asked

He took my hand and stared at me with his beautiful eyes. "Logie I know I fucked up and I'm really sorry, please give me another chance."

I sighed. "Fine this is your last chance, so don't screw up ok"

He gave me a peck on the lips. "Thanks babe, I promise I wont fuck up again"

"If you do I swear I'll…"

I didn't get to finish because he pressed his lips to mine. I kissed him back gently, but I guess he wanted more. He licked my bottom lip begging for access, which I let him have and his tongue exploring every inch of my mouth. I was lowered on my back, our lips never separating. I could help but moan when he sucked a sensitive part on my neck.

"Kendall I don't think we should…" I started

"Logie…its…fine" he said between kisses.

"But I'm not really ready"

"We did it last time"

"That's because you were drunk and I didn't have a choice" I said

"Aw come on Logie, for me" Kendall said

"No I don't feel like it" I said

"Please Logie"

"No"

He pouted. "Logan please"

I got up from the bed. "No Kendall"

He grabbed me by the wrist. "Pleaseeeeeee"

"I said no, just leave me alone"

He pulled me back on to the bed. "Logan just really quick, then I'll leave you alone"

"Kendall please don't pressure me, I'm not going to have sex with you" I said

He pushed me on my back and climbed on top of me. "Just do it"

"Kendall get off me" I said

"Not till I get what I want" he said

I tried to get up but he was stronger then me. I didn't think this would happen again.

"Please Kendall don't…" I started

He pressed his lips to mine and kissed me roughly. I didn't kiss him back, I only tried to get free.

"Knock it off" he growled

"But I don't want to do this" I said

"Well to bad because I do, and your gonna do what I say" he said

I tired to move but he only got angrier and held me down harder. He lowered his hands to my crotch and unbuttoned my pants.

"Stop Kendall" I said

He ignored me and started pulling my pants down.

"GET THE FUCK OFF ME!" I screamed.

He stopped and looked at me. "What?"

"You heard me" I said coolly.

"Its so funny how you think I'm gonna listen to you" Kendall said

"YOU'RE A FUCKING ASSHOLE!" I yelled.

I know I should have said that, but I was tired of never saying anything to him. His eyes grew dark with anger and he hit me in the face. I managed to get one of my arms loose and I punched him in the nose. He grabbed his nose but shrugged it off. I knew I hurt him, but I guess he tried to hide it. He pinned me down again and pulled my pants off and threw them on the floor. I wasn't going to let this happen again, so I did my best to fight back. It didn't work, he was much stronger then me. He removed my boxers and undid his pants, then lowered his boxers to his knees.

"STOP KENDALL!" I yelled.

He ignored me again and punched me in the mouth. I could immediately taste blood. He spread my legs as far as they could go, then positioned himself at my entrance. I started crying, there was nothing I could do. If I screamed for help no one would here me. But then I remembered James and Carlos were here. They could help me.

"JAMES, CARLOS HELP ME!" I screamed.

Kendall cupped my mouth. "They wont hear you, their not here"

I started crying again. James broke his promise too. He said he wouldn't let Kendall hurt me or the baby. But he lied, he wasn't here to protect me. No one was. Kendall continued what he was doing, and slammed into me. I screamed and I could feel more tears running down my face. He started to thrust slowly, then faster and harder. I grabbed a hold of the sheets, and squeezed so hard my knuckles started to turn white. He would pull out then slam into me again. I knew he was doing it on purpose just to hurt me. He finally came inside me, then pulled out and panting heavily. He gave me sloppy kiss on the lips "Thanks Logie, what would I do without you" he said

I didn't say anything just turned away. I couldn't look at him, he wasn't Kendall anymore, he was someone else. He was a monster. He got dressed then left the room as if nothing ever happened. I heard the front door open and close, he left the apartment. I just laid there for a second, I couldn't move, I was too upset. I finally got up and went into the bathroom. I took a quick shower and put my pajamas on, then went back into my room. I climbed on to my bed and curled up into a ball and started crying. My crying was interrupted when I heard the front door open. I gasped. I didn't want Kendall back he might hurt me some more. I thought of locking the door, but he might get angry. I buried my face in my hands, and waited for him to come in.

"Logan are you here?"

I looked up. It wasn't Kendall, it was James. I wanted to answer him, but I was still in shock and scared.

"I'm gonna go take a shower" Carlos said

I heard Carlos walk to the other side of the apartment.

"Logan" James called.

I still didn't answer him, I just couldn't. he knocked on my door and stuck his head in.

"Logan are you… oh my god what happened?" he asked running over to me.

I shook my head and continued to cry.

"Logan please talk to me, what happened" James said wrapping his arms around me.

I shrugged him off and stood up from the bed.

"Logan what's wrong?" he asked

"WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU!" I screamed.

"I was at the pool with Carlos, I was gonna tell you but you were asleep" he said

"You lied to me"

"What?"

"YOU LIED TO ME!" I shouted.

"What do you mean?" James asked.

"You said you would protect me and…and you didn't"

"But… I am protecting you"

"No your not, if you were you would've helped me" I said.

James stood up quickly. "Logan what did he do?"

I shook my head and turned away from him. He grabbed me by the shoulders and turned me to face him. "What did he do?"

I ignored him and cried harder.

"LOGAN TELL ME!" he shouted.

"HE RAPED ME AGAIN!" I screamed.

James dropped his arms and looked at me. "W-what?"

"He fucking raped me again, and you weren't here to stop it" I said

"Logan I'm so sorry, I didn't know…"

"Whatever, you don't care anyway" I said turning to walk away.

He grabbed me by my wrist and pulled me into a hug.

"Logan I do care about you, your like my brother"

"Then why wont you protect me like one" I said into his shoulder.

"I know I should have, and I'm really sorry Logan" he said

"Its ok"

"Not its not, I swear I'm gonna kill him"

"James don't" I said pulling away.

"Logan he did something awful, I'm gonna hurt him so he know what it feels like when he hurts you" he said before walking towards the door.

"JAMES DON'T!" I yelled.

"LOGAN I'M TIRED OF HIM HURTING YOU!" James yelled.

"SO AM I!" I screamed

"THEN WHY DONT YOU DO ANYTHING!"

"BECAUSE I CANT!" I yelled and collapsing on my bed.

James sighed and sat next to me. "Yes you can Logan"

"No I cant, I've tried and I… I just cant" I sobbed.

He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me close. "Logan can I ask you something?"

I looked up at him. "Yeah"

"Why…why are you still with him?" he asked

"W-what?"

"Why are you with him, all he does is hurt you"

"Because…because I love him" I said

"But why all he does is…"

"I know what he does, but I love him so much I cant leave"

"Logan you have a baby on the way, and Kendall is hurting you, your being selfish" James said.

"How am I being selfish?" I asked

"Because by staying with him, your putting your baby in danger"

I turned away from him. He was right, I could hurt my baby. I'm a bad parent.

"But James…I…I cant" I said

"Logan I know you love him, but I don't think he is gonna change" James said

"Yes he will, once the baby arrives he will, I just know it" I said

James sighed. "Logan if he cared about you and the baby, he would've stopped a long time ago"

"No…he loves me, I know he does" I sobbed.

James pulled me into another hug. "Its ok Logan"

I sobbed harder into his chest. It wasn't ok, James was right. If Kendall did really care and love me, he would've stopped. But I cant leave Kendall I love and need him, he is my everything.

"Don't worry Logan, we'll fix this and I promise I'll be here for you" James said

"You promise" I said

"I promise, as long as I live" he said

When I was with James I felt calm and relaxed. With him I felt protected and loved. I pulled away from him and looked into his hazel eyes. Then I did something I shouldn't have. I leaned in and kissed him. His lips were soft and moist. To my surprise he didn't let go right away. He pulled away quickly after a few seconds.

"Logan, w-what was that for?" James asked

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to" I said

"But your with Kendall, and I'm straight"

"I'm really sorry"

He sighed. "Its ok, I understand why you did that"

"Please don't tell Kendall, he'll kill me" I said

James eyes widened.

"Do you think he really would?" I asked

"No I don't think so, but I wont tell him"

I gave him another hug. "Thanks James so much"

"Your welcome, but I can I still hurt him?"

I chuckled. "Not yet"

He smiled. "Ok but when the time comes, I will beat his white ass"

I smiled. "Thanks James, for everything, I really need someone to help me. And I'm glad its you"

James gave me another hug. "I'm glad I could be of help, what are brothers for right"

"Yeah, you're the greatest brother in the world" I said

"Are you feeling better?" he asked.

"Yeah I guess, but I'm really tired"

"Why don't you go back to sleep, ok"

I yawned. "Ok"

"Don't worry, I'll make sure Kendall doesn't come in here"

I smiled. "Thanks"

"Mhm"

I laid down on my bed and felt myself drifting off to sleep.

"Goodnight Logan"

"Goodnight James"

I heard the bedroom door open then shut quietly. I am glad I have James as a friend.

**A/N: i really liked the chapter just because how James is with Logan. anyway i probably wont be able to udate till friday. my parents have this new rule of only use the computer for homeowork, but maybe this is my homwork lol. i hope this chapter is ok, messed up but ok. enjoy =D**


	14. Chapter 14

The next morning I didn't want to wake up, I was to exhausted to do anything, but if I didn't get up Mrs. Knight would worry, and I wasn't comfortable with telling her everything. I quietly entered the living room, and was glad no one was awake. Kendall was asleep on the couch, snoring softly. He looked sweet and innocent in his sleep, but he really wasn't. Kendall has changed so much since I've known him, even since we've been in L.A. he was just so different. I wish I knew who or what changed my Kendall, but I didn't have a clue. I made my way into the kitchen and tried to be really quiet. The last thing I need is for Kendall to wake up, and I get hurt again

"_But maybe he is in a good mood today"_ I thought.

I shook my head of this thought, I'm always lying to myself. I bet Kendall wont even apologize for what he did, but if he does I'm not going to forgive him. I've done that to many times and for what. I didn't feel so hungry, so I decided on orange juice. I served myself a glass and leaned back against the counter, taking little sips.

"Hey Logie"

I looked up to see Kendall leaning against the counter across from me. I turned away, I didn't want to talk to him.

"Logie please talk to me" he said

"What for" I said walking out of the kitchen and towards my bedroom.

He quickly followed me and grabbed my wrist. "Logan please I'm sor…"

"You say that all the time, it means nothing to me" I snapped.

"Just please Logie, give me another chance" he said

"I gave you another chance, and you fucked it up" I said

"Well maybe if you would've listened to me, this wouldn't have happened" Kendall snapped.

"This is not my fault, if you weren't such an asshole towards me…"

"There you go again Logan, always blaming me for everything"

"BECAUSE IT IS YOU!" I shouted.

"Boys are you ok?"

We both turned around to find Mrs. Knight standing in the middle of the living room. Kendall sighed and walked to the front door.

"Are you ok honey?" she asked him

"Whatever" he said before walking out of the apartment.

Mrs. Knight turned her attention back towards me. "Ok what's going on?"

"Nothing we're fine" I said turning away from her.

"Don't you turn away from me mister" she said

I sighed and turned back to face her. "Please mama Knight, I'm not in the mood"

"Logan something is up between you two, and I want to know what it is"

"We're just going through a rough time"

"Oh honey why didn't you tell me" she said giving me a hug.

"I didn't think it was a big deal" I said

"Do you wanna talk about it?" she asked

I sighed. "I don't know"

"Are you sure, maybe I could help"

"Its complicated"

"I think I can handle it" she said

"Really?"

She rolled her eyes and dragged me to the couch. "So what's really going on?"

"Well Kendall he's…different" I said

Mrs. Knight furrowed her eyebrows. "Different?"

"Yeah he hasn't been himself lately, he's changed I guess"

"Is it because of the baby?"

"I doubt it" I mumbled

"What honey?"

"Uh I don't know, I haven't asked him" I said

"Then maybe you should, communication is very important" she said

"Yeah I know, its just that…"

"Just what"

I sighed. "What if he doesn't listen to me"

"Yes he will honey, he loves and cares about you"

"I don't think he does anymore"

"I know for a fact Kendall loves you, you mean the world to him" she said

"Then why is he acting so different towards me?" I asked

"He is probably just scared about the baby and stressed from work" she said

"Yeah I guess you right"

Mrs. Knight gave me another hug. "Now go find him and fix this"

I nodded. "Ok"

"You guys will get passed this, all relationships do"

I smiled. "Thanks mama Knight"

"Anytime" she said standing up from the couch.

The door opened and Kendall walked in. He looked at me then went into our room, slamming the door behind him. I sighed and stood up. I turned to Mrs. Knight, who in return nodded her head. I nodded back and went into the bedroom. Kendall was laying on his bed, with his hands covering his face.

"Kendall we need to talk" I said

"About what Logan" he said

"About us"

He looked up at me. "What?"

I sighed and sat on the edge of his bed. "Kendall I know we're going through a difficult time right now, but we can get passed it"

"I don't know Logie"

"Yes we can, we just have to work harder"

"I'm trying Logie, but I cant control myself. All I do is hurt you"

I didn't say anything just looked down.

"Your gonna leave me"

I looked up at him. "What?"

"I know you've thought about it" he said

"No Kendall I would never leave you, I love you so much" I said

"Just please promise me you'll never leave me, I couldn't handle it, I need you" he said

I sighed and crawled next to him. "I promise I will never leave you"

"You promise"

"Kendall without you I'm nothing"

He smiled. "I love you Logie, so much"

"I love you too" I said leaning in to kiss him

Our lips met, but only for a few seconds. He then pulled away.

"I'm really sorry for being a…"

"Dick"

"Uh yeah"

I smiled. "Its fine, I forgive you"

"Thanks Logie" he said before kissing me again.

Even though he apologized, I was afraid he didn't mean it. I felt like an idiot for forgiving him. But I loved him to much to walk away. If I ever lost him, I would be nothing.

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR

**Kendall's POV**

After Logie and I made up, I felt a lot better. He fell asleep soon after though, and I couldn't help but smile. He looked so adorable, but at the same time extremely exhausted. I knew being pregnant was too much for him, and what I was doing was making it worse. I gave him a kiss on the forehead and went into the living room.

"Hi Kendall, you feeling better"

"Yeah thanks mom"

"That's good"

I smiled and sat down on the couch, and started flipping through the channels on the TV.

"Oh Kendall, I am taking Katie to another audition, so we'll be back late" my mom said

"Huh? Yeah" I said

She rolled her eyes. "Are you even listening to me?"

"Yup"

"Ok please be good" she said before giving me a kiss on the forehead.

"We will"

"If I find out you boys…"

"Mom everything will be fine, don't worry and just enjoy yourself" I said

"Ok just be careful"

"Mom"

"Alright I'll see you later" she said heading towards the door.

"Do we have to go?" Katie whined as she came out of her room.

"Yes and its going to be fun"

Katie rolled her eyes and left the apartment.

"Bye honey"

"Bye"

The door closed and it was just us guys. I continued going through the channels.

"Hey Kendall where is your mom going?" James asked as he entered the living room with Carlos.

"She is taking Katie to an audition, she'll be back later" I said

"Sweet we can have another party" Carlos said

"No parties" I said

"Aw why not?" Carlos asked

"Because last time it didn't go well"

"Yeah it did, it was awesome" James said

"Maybe for you guys, but not for me…or Logan" I said

"Oh ok, then we can just chill by the pool" Carlos said

"Yeah that's fine, let me just get Logan" I say standing up.

James and Carlos nod their heads and go into the kitchen, I quietly open the door to mine and Logan's room. He was still sleeping peacefully, and I felt bad for having to disturb him.

"Hey Logie, wake up babe" I say while gently shaking him.

His eyes fluttered open. "Huh?"

"We're gonna go down to the pool, you wanna come"

He yawned. "Sorry Kendall I'm really tired"

"Don't apologize, I understand"

I gave him a kiss on the forehead. "I'll see you later"

He nodded and rolled back over. I could hear his soft breathing. I left the room, closing the door quietly behind me. James and Carlos were talking in the kitchen. Usually I wouldn't pay attention to their conversations. But this one I could help but eavesdrop. They were talking softly, but I could still make out what they were saying.

"Wait why don't you want Logan to come with us?" Carlos asked.

"Well its not that I don't want him to come, I just don't want it to be awkward" James said.

"Awkward, how?" Carlos asked

James sighed. "Because…because Logan and I… kissed"

"You guys kissed!" Carlos practically yelled.

"Shh, Kendall could here you, and yes we did. But it didn't mean anything, I don't think…"

"Wow, are you gonna tell Kendall"

"I want to, but I don't want Logan to get hurt"

"Then what are you going to do?" Carlos asked

"I don't know, just please don't tell anyone" James said

"I wont"

I couldn't believe it, Logan cheated on me and with one of my best friends. I was so upset and angry. Logan said he loved me and that I meant everything to him. But he lied, I wasnt the liar, he was. Part of me wanted to confront him and then push passed this. But another part of me wanted to beat Logan, till he was lifeless. I shook my head. I cant hurt Logan anymore, I just cant. I relaxed a little, then went into the kitchen.

"You guys ready"

James and Carlos jumped from the sound of my voice.

"Uh…yeah lets go" James said and quickly headed towards the door.

We left the apartment and into the lobby. That's when I spotted Jo, she was sitting on one of the couches.

"I'll meet you guys in a minute" I said

James and Carlos shrugged and went to the pool. I made my way over to Jo. When I approached her, she looked up from her script and smiled.

"Hey Kendall, what's up" she said

"Nothing much, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out" I said

"I would love to, but I have to practice my lines"

"Well maybe I could help you"

"Ok but is Logan ok with us hanging out all the time" she said

"Of course he is fine with it, we're just friends anyway, so he wont get mad" I said

She smiled. "Ok, and thanks for offering to help"

"What are friends for right"

"Yeah, but sometimes I wish we were more then friends, but your with Logan so…."

I didn't let her finish because I pressed my lips to hers. I know its wrong to kiss Jo, but Logan kissed James, so its only fair. Besides this is better then beating Logan right.

**Logan's POV**

I awoke from my nap and decided to meet Kendall at the pool. I quickly pulled out my swim trunks and t-shirt, but hesitated to change. I wasn't sure if he was really there or not, so I was going to check first. I left the apartment and went into the lobby. I checked the pool and noticed Kendall wasn't there, just James and Carlos were. I sighed and turned to walk back to apartment 2J. But something caught my eye, something I was oblivious to when I first walked in. It was Kendall and Jo, and they were making out on the couch. I was right, he was cheating on me, I thought he loved me.

"K-Kendall" I said

He quickly looked up and his eyes widened. "Logan this isn't what it looks like"

"Then what is it?" I asked

"It…I…we…um"

I shook my head and ran to the elevators.

"Logan wait, you don't understand" he yelled

I jumped into the elevator and pressed the button to the second floor.

"Logan please stop" he said running up to the elevators.

I shook my head and doors closed in his face. I started crying, how could he do this to me. I felt so stupid for believing he loved me, I should've just left him a long time ago. When I reached the second floor, I ran to the apartment. I opened the door and ran to my room, slamming the door behind me. I was sp angry I started shaking. I knew I needed to calm down, but I couldn't. I sat on the edge of my bed and let the tears fall.

I heard the front door open, and I knew immediately knew who it was. My bedroom door opened and Kendall walked in.

"Logan we need to talk"

"Just stay away from me" I said

"You don't understand we were…"

"I understand perfectly Kendall, if you fell out of love with me, why didn't you say anything"

"No Logie, I never fell out of love with you" he said

"Then why are you making out with Jo" I snapped.

" Because…"

"Because you're a fucking cheater" I said

"Me, what about you"

"What do you mean?"

"I know what you and James did"

"We didn't do anything" I said

"Don't fucking lie to me Logan"

"I'm not"

"DON'T LIE TO ME!" Kendall shouted.

"I'M NOT LYING!" I yelled

He walked over to me and grabbed my shoulders. "I know you guys kissed"

I turned away from him.

"LOGAN LOOK AT ME DAMN IT!" he yelled.

"Get away from me" I said

He let me go and slapped me across the face. I hissed in pain and grabbed my cheek.

"Why did you guys kiss?" Kendall asked

"Because I needed someone, and James was there" I said

"YOUR FUCKING LYING!" he yelled

"Just get away from me" I said standing up from the bed and heading towards to door.

"Don't you dare walk away from me"

"Watch me" I said reaching for the doorknob

"If you open that door I will hurt you"

"And if you touch me I'll leave you"

His eyes grew dark. "You promised you wouldn't leave me"

"And you promised you wouldn't hurt me, but you never kept that promise did you" I said

"Logan don't"

"Whatever Kendall, I'm done"

He came up to me and spun me around to face him.

"LET ME GO!" I shouted.

He ignored me and pinned me against the wall. "I told you to listen to me"

"Kendall let me go"

"Why so you can run back to James"

"I wont run to James, I'll run to the police" I said

He punched me in the mouth, and I could feel the blood dripping down my chin.

"GET OFF ME!" I screamed.

"Shut up Logan"

"No I'm tired of listening to you, now leave me the fuck alone"

He covered my mouth with his hand. "Shut the fuck up"

I bit his hand and he screamed in pain.

"YOU FUCKING BITCH!" He yelled while holding his hand.

"You deserved it" I said

He grabbed a hold of me and slammed me against the wall. But instead of hitting me, he started choking me.

"K-Kendall…s-stop" I said

He ignored me and tightened his grip around my neck. He was going to kill me, I had to fight back. I managed to knee him in the stomach, causing him to back off and double over in pain. While he was trying to catch his breath, I did my best to catch mine. But he caught his before I did, and he had me pinned against the wall again.

"Please Kendall stop" I said

"You deserve this Logan" he said

He wrapped his hands around my neck and squeezed as hard as he could.

"S-stop…Kendall…I-I cant breath" I managed to choke out.

He paid no attention to my cries, and he punched me in the stomach. I couldn't scream out, so all I could do was wince from the pain. He stopped choking me and continued to hit me in my stomach, then he threw me to the floor and started kicking me.

"Stop Kendall…please" I pleaded

He still didn't stop, but only kicked me harder in the stomach. I screamed from the intense pain that ran through my midsection.

"K-Kendall….please stop" I wheezed while trying to stand up.

He kicked me one last time, which caused me to fall flat on my stomach. Once he was satisfied he backed away. I rolled over to my side, trying to catch my breath and clutching my stomach.

"Oh my god, Logie…I'm so sorry" Kendall said

I slowly stood up, even though it felt like my body was on fire.

"Logie" he said walking towards me.

I backed away from him and ran out of the room, the front door opened and I bumped into James.

"Whoa Logan watch where your…Logan what happened?" James said

I shook my head and pushed passed him and Carlos.

"Logan" he called after me, but I didn't stop, I just ran. I had to get away from Kendall, but I wasn't sure where to go. I ran into one of the elevators and pressed the very first button. The pain in my stomach was getting worse, but there was other things to worry about. The doors opened and ran out to the roof. The roof was the one place I could think straight, and I needed to think some things over.

"Ah!" I said and clutching my stomach harder.

I lifted up my shirt to see a whole bunch of new bruises forming. Another intense pain shot through my abdomen and I fell to my knees. The only thing going through mind right now, was if the baby was ok.


	15. Chapter 15

**James POV**

Carlos and I decided to leave the pool. Both Logan and Kendall never showed up, so we gave up on waiting.

"I wonder why they didn't come with us?" Carlos asked as we entered the elevators.

I shrugged. "Maybe they wanted to be alone"

Carlos and I looked at each other. "Ewwwww" we both said. The doors opened to the second floor, and we made our way to apartment 2J. I opened the door, but was bumped into.

"Whoa Logan watch where your…."

That's when I realized he was crying and bleeding. "Logan what happened?"

He didn't answer me, just shook his head and pushed passed Carlos and I.

"Logan" I called after him.

"What's wrong with him?" Carlos asked worriedly

I shrugged. "I don't know"

Kendall walked into the living room, and was crying as well.

I glared at him. "You"

" What?" he asked

"You hurt Logan didn't you" I said

"I didn't mean to… I-I was just so angry" he said

"I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!" I shouted and rushing over to him.

I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and punched him in the face, causing him to fall to the floor.

I started kicking him in the stomach. "HOW DARE YOU HURT LOGAN!"

"J-James….I didn't mean…ah stop"

"YOU FUCKING MORON!" I screamed and kicked him harder.

"S-stop James….p-please"

I stopped kicking him and jumped on top of him.

"This is for Logan" I said punching his face.

I punched him over and over till my hands were covered in blood.

"JAMES STOP!" Carlos screamed.

I stopped and turned to face Carlos. He was crying and shaking. I stood up and kicked Kendall one last time. Kendall was crying and holding his stomach.

"It hurts doesn't it" I said

He nodded slowly and started whimpering quietly.

"Now you know how Logan feels when you do that to him" I said

Kendall just cried harder. I hope he felt guilty.

"I'm gonna go find Logan" I said to Carlos.

"Ok I'll help Kendall" he said

I nodded and dashed out of the apartment.

"_Please Logan be ok" _I said thought.

**Logan's POV**

I was laying on the cool pavement of the Palm Woods roof, hoping the pain would go away. But it wasn't, only getting worse. I looked down at my stomach and placed a hand over it. I immediately felt tears come to my eyes.

"Please be ok….please" I whispered.

I squeezed my eyes shut as another sharp pain hit. I clutched my stomach and rolled over on my side. The pain was becoming to much, and I couldn't help but scream. I needed help and fast, but no one was around to help, let alone hear me.

"SOME ONE HELP ME!" I yelled.

I let out another scream and held on tighter to my stomach. I closed my eyes and tried not to think about all the pain I was in. I had a feeling I was going to die, and none of my friends knew where I was. I was scared they would never find me, or if they did it would be to late. I started crying, not only from the pain, but because I'll never see my friends or family again. My body started shaking slightly. Then I felt someone grab my shoulder.

"Logan are you ok?"

I opened my eyes. "J-James…is that you"

"Yeah its me, are you ok?" James asked

I rolled over to face him, and was shocked to find him covered in blood.

"What happened to you?" I asked.

"Don't worry this isn't my blood, its Kendall's" he said

I gasped. "W-what?"

"He's fine, just probably has a broken nose" James said.

"You beat him up"

"Yeah and he deserved it"

"You didn't have to do that James" I said

Its fine, I wanted to hit him ever since I found out what he has been doing to you" James said.

"Thanks James, it means a…ah" I said grabbing my stomach.

"Logan, Logan what's wrong?"

I lifted up my shirt to show James the damage.

"Oh my god" he said

I let out another scream as more pain returned. "J-James…it…ah hurts"

"Its ok Logan, I'm gonna help you"

I nodded. He carefully lifted me up into his arms, bridal style. I shut my eyes and waited for the pain to diminish, but it never did. James carried me back to the apartment, but to our surprise it was empty. He laid me down gently on the couch.

"I'm gonna go find Carlos" he said

I grabbed his hand. "No James…don't leave me"

"I'll be right back, I promise" he said before leaving me alone in the apartment.

I decided to go into my room, at least I would be more comfortable in my bed. It was difficult to stand up, but I pushed myself. I walked into my room, and slowly made my way to my bed. I didn't get very far. I doubled over in pain as another intense pain ran through my abdomen. I screamed and fell to my knees, hitting the floor hard.

"JAMES….AH…JAMES!" I screamed.

Even though he wasn't there, I prayed he still heard me somehow. I curled up into a ball and held onto my stomach. "James…help me"

It felt like I was laying there for hours, but it was only a matter of minutes. I heard the front door open, and was relieved it was James.

"Hey Logan, Carlos is at the park with Kendall…Logan where are you?" he said

"In here" I whispered.

I knew he didn't he hear me, but I didn't feel like screaming at the moment.

"Logan where are you? Logan please talk to me" he said

I needed to get his attention, luckily more pain hit and I screamed. I heard him run into the bedroom.

"Logan its ok, I'm here" he said kneeling next to me.

I nodded and tried to get up, but failed. He helped me back on my feet.

"Are you ok?" he asked

"I'm fine, I just need to lay down" I said.

"Ok and I'll get you something for your lip" he said walking out of the room.

I gently touched my lip. It was still bleeding, but not bad. While James was getting stuff for my lip, I walked over to my bed. That's when I felt something warm run down my leg. I looked down at my jeans, and was shocked to see them drenched in a reddish-brown color. I gasped and realized it was blood.

"JAMES!" I screamed.

"Hold on Logan" he called from his room.

More pain hit and I bent over in pain. "JAMES!" I screamed louder.

"What? What is it?" he asked running into the room.

He gasped and dropped the first aid kit. "Logan…your…your bleeding"

I looked up at him. "I know…ah.."

He rushed over to me and led me to the living room. I gently laid down on the couch.

"Logan what do I do?" James asked.

"Call 911" I said.

He quickly grabbed his phone, but was having trouble dialing because he was shaking.

"Fuck I cant do it" he said he said with tears in his eyes.

I stood up from the couch and took his phone. I quickly dialed 911. It was taking forever for the operator to answer, and I could feel myself getting dizzy.

"J-James" was the last thing I said before everything went black.

**James POV**

"_Come on James pull it together!" _I mentally screamed.

I couldn't stop shaking, I was to much in shock. Logan was dieing, and all I was doing was freaking out. I was brought back to reality when I hear a giant thud. I quickly turned around to find Logan laying on the floor.

I ran to his side. "Logan wake up"

He didn't respond.

"Please Logan wake up" I said gently shaking him.

I started to panic. "Logan don't do this to me, wake up"

I grabbed his wrist and checked for a pulse. He had one, but it was very faint. I picked him up in my arms, and ran down to the lobby.

"J-James"

I looked down at him. "Yeah Logan"

"What's going on?" he asked weakly.

"Everything's fine, your gonna be ok" I said.

He nodded and he was out again. When I reached the lobby, everyone gave me confused and worried looks.

"Hey your getting blood all over the carpet" Mr. Bitters screamed at me.

I paid him no attention and ran to my car. I made it to my car and placed Logan in the passenger side. I jumped into the drivers seat and started car. I pulled out of the Palm Woods, and sped to the hospital. On my way there I called Carlos.

"Come on pick up" I said.

"Hello"

"Carlos I'm taking Logan to the hospital and…"

"Wait what's going on?" he asked.

"I'm not sure, but he's bleeding and unconscious" I said

"Ok I'll ask Kelly to take us to hospital" Carlos said.

"Carlos what's wrong?" I heard Kendall ask in the back round.

"Its Logan, he's hurt" Carlos told Kendall.

"What do you mean!" Kendall screamed.

"Kendall calm down, hey James I'll talk to you later" Carlos said.

"Ok bye" I said.

I looked over at Logan to make sure he was still breathing. He looked so pale from losing all that blood. I took his hand and gave it a squeeze. "Everything will be alright Logan" I finally reached the hospital and carried him inside. I ran as fast as I could to the reception desk.

"Please help me, my friend is bleeding and is unconscious" I said breathlessly.

"What's your name?" the receptionists asked.

"I'm James Diamond and he's Logan Mitchell"

She nodded and called for a doctor and some nurses. That's when I recognized a familiar face running down the hall towards us.

"Courtney!" I yelled.

"James is everything alright?" she asked.

"I don't know, he was complaining about stomach pain, and now he is bleeding" I said

Her face turned pale. "Oh my god"

"What? What's wrong?" I asked

She ignored me and placed Logan on a gurney, and quickly rushed him down the hall.

"Wait Courtney" I said running after her.

She stopped and told the nurses something, then turned back to me.

"I want to go with him" I said

"I'm sorry James, you'll have to wait here" she said before running after the nurses.

I walked to the waiting room, and waited. About an hour later, Carlos still want here and I haven't heard anything about Logan. I started pacing the room nervously.

"James Diamond for Logan Mitchell"

I looked up to see Courtney standing by the reception desk. I ran over to her.

"Is Logan ok? Can I see him?" I asked

"He's fine, just a little tired" she said

I sighed in relief. "Can I see him?"

"Yes but only for a few minutes" she said

"How's the baby?" I asked.

**Logan's POV**

I awoke to the sound of beeping. I opened my eyes and looked around. I was in a room that was completely white, and I realized I was in a hospital. I was hooked up to a machine, and bag of blood was next to me. I turned away quickly. The door to my room opened and James walked in.

I smiled. "Hey James"

He gave me small smile. "Hi Logan"

I could tell something was wrong.

"James are you ok?" I asked

"Yeah…I'm ok, what about you?"

"I feel a little better, the pain is gone now"

He looked down and stared hard at the floor. I could hear him crying softly.

"James what's wrong?" I asked

He quickly wiped his eyes. "Nothing"

"Is…my baby ok?"

He started crying again. "I'm so sorry Logan"

"Why are you sorry?"

"The baby…didn't make it"

His words hit me hard like a bullet to the chest. My baby wasn't dead, he was lying.

"Please tell me your lying" I said

"I'm really sorry Logan" he said

I shook my head. "No my baby is fine, it has to be"

James came up to me and gave me a hug. "I'm sorry"

I cried into his shoulder, and held him tightly. I started to sob and shake.

"Its ok Logan, sometimes things happen for a reason" James said

"Then…w-what was… the reason" I said

"Maybe you weren't ready and…"

"No I was ready, Kendall I could handle it" I said interrupting him.

"You may have been ready, but Kendall wasn't"

"What do you mean?"

"Logan maybe it was best you lost the baby, your relationship with Kendall was to dangerous for one"

"This is all my fault, if I would've left him sooner….this wouldn't have happened" I sobbed.

"No Logan its not your fault, you tried you best to protect the baby" he said

"But I didn't try hard enough"

"If anyone should feel guilty it should be Kendall…and me" James said.

"Why should you, you didn't do anything"

"Exactly, I didn't keep my promise. I thought I could protect you and the baby from Kendall, but I couldn't. I'm so sorry"

"James its not your fault, you did try your best. But you were there for me when I needed someone to comfort me. You're a really good friend" I said

He pulled me closer. "Thanks Logan, and don't worry everything will be ok"

I nodded into his shoulder. He may think things will, but I knew they weren't going to be.

He let me go and pulled out his phone. "Carlos is here, I'm gonna go meet him"

I nodded and watched as he left the room. I laid back down and looked up at the ceiling. A few minutes later the door opened.

"Logie?"

I sighed and turned to face Kendall. He closed the door and made his way to me.

"Go away Kendall" I said turning to face the wall.

"Please Logie, just listen to me" he said

"Leave me alone"

"Ok I understand, but how…how is the baby?"

I felt my eyes fill up with tears. "There is no baby"

"W-what?"

"Just go away Kendall"

"Logie please talk to me"

I turned over to face him. "Just leave"

"But Logie I'm sor…."

"GET OUT!" I screamed.

He was taken aback, but nodded his head and left the room. Once the door closed, I started sobbing again. This was like a nightmare I couldn't wake up from. No one understands how I feel right now. No one could rid me of this pain. No one could help me, for I was lost in darkness.

**A/N: i feel bad for Logan, it isnt fair he had to lose the baby. its all Kendall's fault =(. But i do hope everyone still enjoyed this chapter.**


	16. Chapter 16

**Kendall's POV**

Once I closed the door to Logan's room, I could hear him sobbing. I slid down to the floor and started crying. This wasn't supposed to have happened to him, I'm a horrible boyfriend. How could I have hurt Logan and my baby, even though I promised I wouldn't. I don't deserve Logan, but I cant give him up, I love him so much.

"Kendall"

I looked up to see Carlos standing next to me. I quickly wiped my eyes. "Yeah Carlos"

"James told me everything, I'm so sorry" he said

"This shouldn't have happened" I said.

Carlos sat down next to me and put his arm around my shoulder.

"I know, but accidents happen"

"But Carlos, this wasn't really an accident"

"What do you mean?"

I sighed. "I wanted to beat Logan, he deserved it for what he did. I had to beat him to feel better."

"He didn't deserve any of that, why didn't you guys discuss it instead?"

"I don't know I was to angry to talk it out, I never meant for this to happen" I said

"I know Kendall"

"If I could've controlled my anger, my baby would still be alive"

"Its ok Kendall, everything will be alright"

I sighed. "I don't think so this time, Logan will never forgive me"

Carlos opened his mouth to say something, but closed it. We sat there in silence for a few minutes.

"Carlos can I ask you something?"

He looked at me. "Yeah of course"

"Do…do you think I'm a monster?" I asked.

"Well…um…I don't know" he said

"Carlos you can be honest, I wont get mad"

"Ok I uh…think you've changed, and I don't like it, no one does"

"I know and I'm sorry"

"What caused you to get this way?" he asked

"I'm not sure, all I know is when I get stressed I get angry, but its never gotten out of hand like this" I said

"But why did you hit Logan?"

I felt tears come to my eyes. "I don't know, I treated him like my personal punching bag, when I never should have touched him the first place"

I started crying again and Carlos pulled me close. "Its ok" he said. I nodded my head, but nothing was ok.

"Do y-you think Logan w-will forgive me, even after what I did?" I asked

"I think he will, he loves you" Carlos said.

"I don't even know why he loves me, I'm not even good to him" I said

"He loves you, just not the new Kendall, he misses the old one"

"But how to I get the old me back?"

"You'll find a way, your Kendall Knight"

I smiled. "Thanks Carlos"

He smiled back. "No problem, what are brothers for"

"I guess I should make sure James isn't still mad at me" I said while standing up.

Carlos stood up as well. "Yeah I think he has cooled down by now"

I went into the waiting room to find James sitting in one of the chairs, with his head in his lap. I walked over to him and sat in the chair next to him.

"James are you ok?" I asked

"Go away Kendall" he said

"Please James don't be mad at me"

"Well I cant be happy with you now can I"

"James I know what I did was wrong, and I need all my friends to help me get through this" I said

He looked up at me. "You? What about Logan he's the one suffering"

"I know but I need some comfort to"

"No you need to get your shit together, Logan needs the comfort, he just lost his baby"

"It was my baby too"

"Then why didn't you care about it as much as Logan did?" James asked.

"I did care about it, but do you know how hard it is to control my anger" I said

"If it was my baby I would've been able to"

I stood up from the chair. "James you don't understand, I loved and cared for that baby"

He stood up as well and got in my face. "Then if you cared so much, why did you kill it?"

"You know I didn't mean to"

"You and I both know you did, don't lie"

"I DIDN'T MEAN TO!" I yelled.

"Your always lying aren't you, why cant you just man up and admit that you did it on purpose" James said.

"Then answer me this, why would I kill my own baby?" I asked

"Because that's what murderers do"

"I am not a murderer"

"Just keep telling yourself that" he said before walking away.

I sat back down and placed my head in my lap. I could feel tears roll down my face. James was right about everything. Not only was I a monster, but also a murderer.

**James POV**

God I hated Kendall so much right now. How could he go and deny everything. I knew he didn't want that baby in the first place, that's probably why Logan was afraid to tell him he was pregnant. I left the waiting room and decided to check on Logan. I opened the door to his room to find him facing the wall and asleep. I sighed and took a seat next to him.

"I'm so sorry this happened to you, you didn't deserve this. Why didn't you just leave Kendall when you had the chance. He doesn't deserve you, you belong with someone that will respect and love you. Like me…"

I was a little shocked about what I said. I knew I loved Logan, but I only thought of him as a friend, nothing more. But the day he kissed me, it was an incredible feeling. I haven't stop thinking about it ever since. But I knew I would never have a chance with him, he loved Kendall more then anything. I sighed and left the room. I wanted to tell Logan how I feel about him, but I was afraid he wouldn't feel the same way. Even though he kissed me, it probably didn't mean anything. If only I could show him that we belong together, but of course that was never going happen. He loved Kendall and Kendall loved him. Usually I would never be jealous of Kendall, because I have the face and I was very talented. But Kendall had something I didn't. Something I could treat better then he could. He had Logan.

**Logan's POV**

I heard the door to my room open, and thinking it was Kendall, I pretended to be asleep. That's when I realized it wasnt Kendall, but James.

"I'm so sorry this happened to you, you didn't deserve this. Why didn't you just leave Kendall when you had the chance. He doesn't deserve you, you belong with someone that will respect and love you. Like me…"

I opened my eyes, but didn't turn over to face him. I couldn't believe it James loved me, but more then a friend or brother. I thought he was straight and only in love with himself, but he wasn't. Maybe it was when I kissed him, that changed his mind. Even though I was in love with Kendall, James was there for me when I needed someone. James was like my protector. During this whole thing with Kendall, I've been starting to fall for James. Because only he could give me what Kendall couldn't, and that was love and respect. I had to tell him how I felt, while I still had the chance.

"James I love you" I said.

But I didn't get a response.

"James?"

Still nothing.

I turned around to find James was already gone. He didn't get to hear what I had to say. I sighed and rolled over to face the wall. He was never going to know how I feel about him. But if I was in love with James, what about Kendall? Kendall meant everything to me, and I don't know if I could lose him. Then again he never seemed to care about me. He claims he does, but he never showed it. James on the other hand showed he cared about me. He took care of me when I was sick and comforted me when I was upset. Kendall never did any of those things, he only caused me pain. I had to make a decision between the two. Was I going to pick Kendall, the guy I've been in love with for as long as I could remember. The guy I couldn't live with or without. Or James, the one person that has helped me the most, and made me feel safe and loved. The choice was obvious, but could I make it.

**Kendall's POV**

James, Carlos and I left the hospital, but Logan had to stay there for a few more days. The ride back was awful and it made me uncomfortable. James drove, but didn't talk to me or Carlos. Carlos sat quietly in the backseat. I tried talking to James, but he would just ignore me. When we got to the Palm Woods , people were whispering among themselves as we walked through the lobby. Wow news spreads fast here in Hollywood. Everyone knew Logan was in the hospital, they just didn't know why. And they never were. We entered apartment 2J and I was surprised to find my mom and Katie here.

"I got a call from Kelly saying Logan's in the hospital, what happened?" my mom asked.

"Ask the murderer" James said before going to his room.

"James wait" Carlos said before following him.

My mom looked at me. "Murderer? Kendall what is he talking about?"

I started crying and she rushed over to me, pulling me into a hug. "I'm so sorry mom"

"Honey what's wrong?"

"Logan…l-lost the baby"

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry honey. How did this happen?"

"Can we please sit down?" I asked.

She nodded. "Of course"

I walked over to the couch and sat down. My mom sat next to me and grabbed my hand.

"Katie can you please go to your room?" my mom asked.

"But I want to stay, this concerns my niece or nephew" Katie said

"Please Katie leave, I need to talk to mom in private" I said

She nodded and went into her room. Once I heard the door close, I turned back to my mom.

"Mom please don't hate me when I tell you this" I said

"Honey whatever it is I wont hate you" she said

"You say that now, but once I tell you, you'll hate me"

She frowned. "I promise I wont, now what's going on"

"Its…its my fault Logan lost the baby"

"You don't have to blame yourself, miscarriages happen and its not your fault or Logan's"

"But I caused him to miscarry"

"I don't understand"

I sighed and looked down. "I beat Logan up"

"Why did you hit him, you knew he was pregnant" my mom said

"I know, but I had to, he cheated on me."

"That's no excuse to hit him, god Kendall why would you do that"

"Because when I get angry, I take it out on him. I'm sorry mom" I said

"Is that why he was covered in bruises?" she asked

"Yes, I never meant to hurt him, but I couldn't control myself"

She stood up from the couch. "I cant believe you"

"Mom please I'm sorry"

"Kendall I raised you to know that abuse is wrong, I cant believe you would hurt Logan."

"There is one more thing"

"Oh god Kendall what else did you do"

"I also…raped him…twice"

"You did what!" she screamed.

I flinched. "I was drunk the first time when I did that to him"

My mom didn't say anything. But she looked like she was on the verge of tears.

"Mom I'm sorry"

"Kendall I cant talk to you right now" she said turning away from me.

I stood up from the couch. "Please mom don't turn away from me like James did, I need you. Please help me"

She sighed and turned around to face me. "I wont turn away from you and I will help you, but I still cant believe my Kendall would do those things"

I started crying and she pulled me into another hug.

"Please mom…don't hate me" I said

"I don't hate you, but I hate what you did. This isn't something my Kendall would do." she said

"If I could just get some help, I promise my old self would be back" I said

She nodded. "I'll help you get your life back on track. Just please promise me you'll never harm Logan or anyone else again"

"I promise I wont hurt anyone ever again"

"Please don't break this promise Kendall" she said

"I wont mom, I've learned my lesson" I said

She pulled away and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

"Now I have to fix my relationship with James, he hates me"

"He doesn't hate you, you're one of his best friends"

"I don't think he wants anything to do with me"

"Don't worry he will forgive you, now go and talk to him"

"Thanks mom for everything, and I promise I will change" I said

She smiled. "I know you will"

I slowly made my way to James and Carlos's shared room. When I reached the door, I hesitated to knock. After a few minutes, I took a deep breath and knocked.

"Who is it?" Carlos asked.

"Its me" I said

"Oh hold on" he said

"No don't answer it" I heard James say

"Aw come on, he's our friend" Carlos said

"Maybe your friend, but not mine" James said

Ouch that hurt. I guess I was right about James not wanting to be my friend. But I was going to change that.

"Please James, I need to talk to you" I said

I heard them whispering, but I couldn't tell what they were saying. After a few minutes the door opened.

"I'll let you guys talk alone" Carlos said before leaving the room.

I walked into their room and closed the door. James was sitting on his bed with his arms crossed.

"What do you want?" he asked.

"James I'm here to apologize and…"

"Well your wasting your time, I don't want to accept your apology" he said

"Please James I'm really sorry"

"Why are you apologizing to me, it should be Logan"

I sighed and sat on the edge of his bed. "He will never forgive me"

"Tell me about it"

"James why do you hate me so much?" I asked.

"Because of what you did Kendall, you should have never touched him" he said

"I didn't mean to, I was just…"

"Angry I know, but you still don't hurt the people you love"

"I know but…"

"I don't even know why he is still with you"

"What?"

"Well if I was Logan I would've left a long time ago" James said

"But he loves me, so he would never leave me" I said

"But why does he even love you, you treat him like shit"

"I know I do, but I swear I will get better and I wont hurt him anymore"

"And what if you don't get better, then what" James said

"Then….then I'll let him go" I said

"You would"

"Yeah, I would rather him be safe, with me he isn't"

"Good, because he deserves someone that will love and respect him. And that person isn't you"

"You don't need to keep reminding me, I know I'm not right for him. But if he will just give me another chance, then I could show him I'm the right guy" I said

"Well you better, because if you hurt him again, you will lose both Logan and me"

"I promise James I wont hurt him anymore, I'm gonna change. But can we still be friends"

He sighed. "I….I guess"

I smiled. "Thanks James for giving me another chance, it means a lot"

He stood up and gave me a hug. "Just please Kendall don't fuck up this time, because I don't want to lose you as a friend"

"I don't want to lose you either, you guys are like my brothers" I said into his shoulder.

He let me go after a few minutes. "I guess we better get some rest, today was really tiring"

"Yeah it was, I'll see you tomorrow" I said before walking towards the door.

He smiled. "Night Kendall"

I smiled back. "Good night James"

I went into my room and collapsed on my bed. I was to tired to change into my pajamas. It felt weird not having Logan here with me, but he was coming home in a few days so I will see him again soon. Things seemed to be getting better. I made up with James and I was going start getting help. The only thing left to do was to fix things with Logan. I just hope he will forgive me.

**A/N: ok i have a question. should i change this to a jagan fic? i have gotten a few reviews that would like it to be a jagan fic. so if i get a lot of votes, i will make it one. hope everyone liked this chapter =D**


	17. Chapter 17

**Logan's POV**

After being in the hospital for a few days, I finally got to go home. To tell you the truth I didn't want to go back, but I didn't want to be stuck in the hospital either. Mrs. Knight and Carlos came to pick me up. I was a little sad that James wasn't with them, or even Kendall. Even though I was mad at Kendall, I still loved him. But then I was also in love with James. This was going to be a hard decision. I sat quietly in the passenger seat, while Mrs. Knight drove and Carlos was in the back.

"Honey how are you feeling?" Mrs. Knight asked.

"I don't want to talk about it" I said

"Are you sure? I can help you"

"No one can help me"

She sighed and turned her attention back to the road. I closed my eyes and slept all the way back to the Palm Woods.

"Hey dude wake up"

I opened my eyes to find Carlos shaking me gently. "Huh? Why?"

"Because we're here, now come on" he said

I groaned but got out of the car. We made our way through the lobby, and everyone was watching me. I felt nervous and sick. Why did everyone have to know what happened to me.

"Hey Carlos, do they know why I was in the hospital?" I asked once we entered the elevator.

He shook his head. "They don't know anything, and we're going to make sure they don't"

I nodded and turned to Mrs. Knight. "Is Kendall mad at me?"

"No he isn't, but he is mad at himself. Why didn't you tell me your relationship was taking a turn for the worst?" she said

I sighed. "I didn't want anyone to worry, I thought I could've handled it"

She gave me a hug. "I would've helped you, before it got worse"

"I know, I'm sorry"

"Don't be, its not your fault"

We let go as the doors opened to the second floor. Once we entered apartment 2J, I just wanted to sleep, and never wake up. James and Kendall were watching TV, but jumped up to greet me when we walked in. James walked over and gave me a hug, while Kendall stayed behind. He seemed unsure if he should hug me or not.

"Logan are you feeling better?" James asked.

I put on my fake smile. "Sort of, but I think I just need some rest"

He nodded and I walked over to mine and Kendall's shared room. While I passed Kendall, he opened his mouth to say something, but closed it. I sighed and went into the room. I laid down on my bed, but couldn't fall asleep. I kept think about Kendall, and how much I loved him. But those thoughts soon shifted to what he has done to me, and I could soon feel tears roll down my cheeks. If he loved me so much why did he do all those things. I covered my face with my hands and sobbed quietly.

"Logie, are you ok?"

I removed my hands to see Kendall standing by the door.

"Please go away" I said

"No I need to make sure your ok" he said

"Well I'm fine, now just leave"

He sighed and sat down on the edge of my bed. "Please Logan talk to me, I need to know how your feeling"

"Why is my feelings important now?" I asked.

"They were always important" he said

"Well then if they were so important, why did you treat me bad?"

"I'm really sorry Logie, I never meant to hurt you in anyway. But when I get angry, I just need to release my anger and…"

"I was there"

"Yeah, but I never should have taken it out on you. Please forgive me"

"Why should I, so you can do it all over again" I said

"No I promise I wont hurt you anymore, I'm going to change" he said

"I don't believe you, you've told me this so many times, and you still haven't changed."

"But I will change, I need to"

"I thought you would've when you found out I was pregnant, but you only got worse and…"

I couldn't finish because I was crying again. Kendall didn't change at all like I thought. He just got worse and killed one of the things I loved so much. It hurt to think that my boyfriend would actually do something like that.

"I'm so sorry Logie, I never meant to hurt our baby" he said

"But why didn't you stop, if you didn't kick me in the stomach then….this wouldn't have happened" I said

He pulled me into a hug. "I'm so sorry Logie, this is all my fault. I hate myself so much for what I did."

"I don't think we should …" I started.

"Should what, please tell me"

I sighed. "I don't think I can be with you anymore"

He let me go and I could see the hurt in his eyes. "Please Logie, give me another chance. I cant lose you, I need you more then anything"

"I don't know Kendall, you always tell me that. But do you really mean it" I said

"Yes I mean it. Logan I love you so much, please don't leave me. Without you there is no point in living. Please give me another chance, I can fix this"

I could see his eyes fill up with tears. Did he really mean it or was this just an act. I couldn't live with out him either, I needed him. I loved him more then life itself.

"Then prove you love me" I said

"W-what?"

"If you love me so much prove it. If your gonna change then I want to see you do it, and not say you will then you hit me again."

"I promise you I will change, I cant keep living like this. I wont hurt you anymore, but please promise me you wont hurt me either" He said.

"How have I hurt you?" I asked.

"When you kissed James, it really hurt. It felt like you didn't love me anymore"

"I didn't mean to kiss him, I just felt so alone and he was there for me. I'm sorry Kendall"

"I guess I understand, but please don't do it again. I cant lose you to James"

I gave him a peck on the lips. "Your not going to lose me"

"You promise"

"I promise. Kendall Knight I love you so much, why would I want to lose you"

He looked down. "But why do you love me, I'm a… monster"

I sighed and put my hand on his shoulder. "I know you didn't mean to do what you did, but if you can change, then we'll be fine"

"How do you know that Logie, what if I cant do it"

"Yes you can, I have faith in you and so does everyone else"

He looked up at me and smiled. "You really think so"

"I know so" I said while leaning in.

He followed me and our lips touched. He gently pushed me back on the bed and kissed me passionately. I ran my fingers through his blonde hair. I didn't want this moment to end. But I was also hoping I made the right choice by taking him back. If he didn't show improvement I was going to have to leave him, it wasn't worth staying if he is just going to cause me more pain. Our kiss was interrupted by a knock on the door. Kendall groaned but opened it.

"Hey guys, mama Knight says its time for dinner" Carlos said.

"Okay thanks" Kendall said.

Carlos nodded and left the room.

"Come on Logie" Kendall said

I took his hand and followed him into the kitchen. When we walked in, I couldn't help but notice the way James was looking at us. I glanced down at my hand, which Kendall was holding tightly. I sighed and sat down at the table.

"So are you guys doing better?" Carlos asked.

Kendall smiled and looked at me. "Yeah we are"

I couldn't help blush. I looked at James, but he had his head down and he was stabbing his food with his fork. I winced and tried to ignore it. I couldn't help but feel guilty. James said he loved me and I loved him too, but I was with Kendall.

"Logan I just want you know that we're here for you, and I think I speak for everyone when I say this." Mrs. Knight said.

I smiled. "Thank you, it means a lot"

The rest of the evening seemed to go by just fine. But I had a feeling it wasn't going to last. Everyone said they would be there and help me, but could they really help me get through all this. It seemed like no one could help me, I was just in so much pain. Yeah I mean I made up with Kendall, but was he really going to change. And there was James, I was falling for him. I needed both Kendall and James in my life, I couldn't have one without the other.

I laid in bed that night thinking about James and Kendall. I couldn't lose them, I just cant. But what if Kendall never changed, I would probably go with James. But then I would be breaking my promise to Kendall. Why did this have to be so fucking difficult. After a few hours I finally fell asleep.

I was right nothing was fine. A week has gone by and I didn't feel any better, just worse. I kept thinking about James and Kendall, and also my baby. Every time I thought about the innocent creature, I would break down. If only it survived, then I would be happy. But its gone now, so I wasn't happy and probably never will. I started to give up on life. I lost a lot of weight from not eating and I have been losing sleep as well. I would wake up in the middle of the night screaming and crying. Kendall didn't know what to do, and him comforting me wasn't really helping. When the guys would go down to the pool, I would stay locked up in my room. The only time I did leave was for rehearsal, which I lost interest in. Gustavo would yell at me all the time now because I was doing a half ass job. Even Mr. X was getting frustrated with me. They wanted me to work hard, and for what to make them happy. Well why should they be happy when I obviously wasn't. During days when there was no rehearsal, I would stay locked in my room and cry. Sometimes I would get so upset and cut myself. The pain felt good and I couldn't help but smile when my blood would slide down my arm. I needed to feel something, anything. So if cutting myself would give me that satisfaction, then I would keep doing it.

I could tell everyone was worried about me. They would whisper things about me when they thought I wasn't paying attention. But I was and I could here everything. Kendall seemed to be really worried about me, and I was glad. I wanted him to feel guilty for making me do this to myself. James was even concerned. He didn't seem angry anymore, just scared for me. But since no one said anything about it, I didn't stop. I knew I was hurting everyone, but I didn't care. They needed to suffer. But of course they would never feel the pain that I was feeling. Unless there was a way they could. And I think I know the answer to this. I don't know if its worth it, but I wasn't happy and I don't think I ever will get better. I wanted things to get back to the way they were, before any of this happened. But it probably never would and I was sure I wasn't the only one thinking this. I was hurting and no one understood, they thought they did, but they really didn't. I was in so much pain and I needed to end it. I needed to end everything.


	18. Chapter 18

**James POV**

This whole week has been terrible. Logan was upset, and I couldn't do anything about it. He just seemed to give up on everything. He stopped eating, sleeping and socializing. This wasn't like him at all. I asked Kendall if he had anything to do with it, but he claimed he didn't and that he was worried about Logan as well. I started thinking that I had something to do with all this. I probably wasn't there for him, even though I promised I would. Most of the time Logan would lock himself in his room, and I would hear him cry from time to time. He shouldn't be shutting himself out, it wasn't good for him. On days when we were free from Gustavo, Logan would go straight to his room. Which I didn't like, he didn't hang out with us anymore.

It was Saturday which meant no rehearsal, so we decided to go down to the pool. Logan however stayed in bed, while we got ready. Carlos and Kendall were waiting for me on the couch, while I was getting ready. I came out of my room hoping to see Logan in his swim trunks and t-shirt, but like always he wasn't there.

"Is Logan coming?" I asked.

Kendall shook his head. "He locked himself in our room again"

"I'll fix this" I said while walking towards their room.

"I already tried James, he isn't coming out for no one" Kendall called.

I ignored him and went anyway. I reached the door and knocked.

Nothing.

I knocked again and still didn't get a response. I sighed and was about to knock one more time, but the door opened.

"Kendall I already told you I'm not going, so just lea…" Logan said as he opened the door.

"Are you sure about that?" I asked.

"Oh James I thought you were Kendall, I'm sorry" he said

"Its fine Logan, are you sure you don't want to come with us, it will be fun"

He sighed. "Sorry I'm not in the mood"

I frowned. "Aw come on, you've been in there all week. Just come and chill will us, besides you look like you could use the fresh air"

"I need more then fresh air James"

"But maybe relaxing at the pool will make you feel better"

"No it wont, good bye James" he said while closing the door.

I stopped the door from closing with my foot.

"James please leave me alone"

"Logan just hang out with us for a little bit, we miss you man"

"Sorry James"

I grabbed his hand. "Come on Logan just…"

I stopped when I noticed the cuts and scratches that covered his wrist and arms.

"Logan what the hell?"

He quickly pulled his arm away and looked down.

"Logan are you….cutting yourself?" I asked.

He didn't answer me, just slammed the door in my face.

"Logan please talk to me"

He didn't respond, but I could've sworn I heard him crying. I sighed and went back into the living room.

"Hey is he coming?" Carlos asked.

I shook my head. "He refused to leave"

"Lets just give him some space, he'll come around" Kendall said.

I nodded but I guess I didn't look convinced.

"James he'll be fine, he just need time to relax and pull himself together" Kendall said.

I sighed. "But what if he cant and then he…."

"No he wont do anything to harm himself, I know him" Kendall said.

"Do you really know him Kendall?" I asked.

He didn't say anything.

"Lets just go" I said heading towards the door.

We spent the rest of the afternoon at the pool, but I still couldn't stop thinking about Logan. He needed us more then ever, but he didn't want to admit it. I sat in one of the lounge chairs while Carlos and Kendall were having fun in the pool. I couldn't believe they were acting as if everything was fine, it obviously wasn't. Logan was suffering and hurting himself. How could we be so blind? We needed to help him before he really hurt himself.

It started to get dark, so we decided to go back.

"Do you think Logan is ok?" Carlos asked as we passed through the lobby.

"I'm sure he's fine Carlitos" Kendall said.

I wanted to believe Kendall, but Logan was a mess, he wasn't fine. We entered apartment 2J and collapsed on the couch.

"Today was actually fun" Carlos said

Kendall smiled. "Yeah it was, but now I'm kinda hungry"

"Well dinner will be here soon" Mrs. Knight said from the kitchen.

"Cool, what's for dinner?" Kendall asked.'

"I ordered Japanese food" she said.

"Sweet!" Kendall and Carlos said while giving each other high fives.

Just then the door bell rang.

"Looks like dinner is here, James can you please go get Logan" Mrs. Knight said.

I nodded and went to Kendall and Logan's room.

"Hey Logan its time for dinner" I said

"I'm not hungry"

"Aw come on dude its your favorite"

"I don't feel like it"

"But you love Japanese food"(1)

"Go away"

I sighed and went into the kitchen.

"Any luck?" Mrs. Knight asked.

"No he doesn't want to come out" I said while sitting down at the table.

"But he loves Japanese food" Carlos said with his mouth full of food.

"He said he isn't hungry" I said.

"I hope my Logie's ok" Kendall said.

I couldn't help but growl on the inside. I was still jealous that Kendall had Logan, but I tried not to get mad over it. I guess I was just going to have to accept the fact that Logan will never be mine. After dinner we cleaned up and watched a little TV. Logan didn't come out if his room once, not even when Carlos asked him if he wanted to play dome hockey with us. But since he refused, we watched TV instead. We couldn't really play dome hockey with only three people, it wouldn't have been the same without Logan. After a while, we decided to go to bed. Logan opened the door for Kendall, but that was about it. I laid in bed listening to the sound of Carlos's snoring and the busy streets of L.A. The whole week seemed weird, I guess I was used to having Logan there with us. But when he wasn't there, it seemed like he never existed. Yeah I thought about him all the time, but its still seemed as if he was never even here. If this was what it felt like when he was locked away in his room all day, I didn't want to know what it felt like if he was dead. I shook my head form this thought. Logan would never kill himself, I know him well enough. He's not that kind of guy. But then remembered the question I asked Kendall earlier today. Did we really know Logan?

**Logan's POV**

I was finally able to fall asleep, which was good because I haven't slept all week. Of course the it didn't last long. I woke up with a start and was covered in sweat. I had another nightmare, but I was surprised I didn't wake up screaming this time. I looked over at Kendall, he was sleeping peacefully. If only I could sleep like that. I tried to fall back asleep but the nightmare still plagued my mind. So I decided to just lay in the darkness and think. The first thing that came to mind was Kendall, its always him. But it wasn't all the good things he has done, but the bad. Sometimes it seemed as if he would strike again, and that scared me more then anything. I wanted so bad to believe he was going to change, my heart said he would, but my head said otherwise.

I climbed out of bed and went into the bathroom. I grabbed the razor from the shower and placed it over my wrist. I took a deep breath and sliced the skin. It was painful, but at least I was feeling something. I did this over and over again, until there was blood all over my arm and the sink. I looked in the mirror and I didn't recognize myself. My reflection wasn't me. The person staring back at me was screaming for help, but no one could hear him. I felt tears come to my eyes, and I let them fall. My tears mixed with my blood, and making a pinkish color. I set the razor down on the counter. I knew I couldn't keep living like this, I cant take the pain anymore. I knew had to end it all, for it to go away forever. I didn't care about life anymore, I cared about the people in my life, but did they care for me. They probably didn't. I knew how to escape everything, so if me leaving would make me feel better. Then so be it.

**James POV**

I woke up because I thought I heard Logan singing. I sat up in bed and rubbed my head. I guess I was in love with him so much, that I was starting to dream about him. But then I realized I wasn't dreaming, I could hear someone singing softly.

_I've lost it all_

_I fell today_

_Its all the same_

_I'm sorry_

_I'm sorry_

The singing stopped and I heard crying. It was defiantly Logan. I jumped out of bed and went to go check on him.

"Logan" I whispered.

Silence.

I ran to his room and he wasn't there. I went into the bathroom that Kendall and him shared, and was shocked to find blood everywhere. I checked the rest of the apartment, but he was gone. I dashed out of the apartment.

"Logan, Logan where are you?" I whispered.

Still nothing.

I looked everywhere for him, but I couldn't find him at all. I felt my eyes fill up with tears. I was gonna lose my best friend, and he was never going to hear me say I loved him. I had to find him and fast. Then it hit me. I knew exactly where he was. I ran to the elevators and pressed the top button.

"Please Logan be there….please"

The elevator doors opened and I went through another door. The cool air hit my face as the door swung open. I was on the roof, I just hope Logan was here too. I listened for any sign of Logan, but I only heard the sound of the wind blowing.

"_Maybe he wasn't here" _I thought.

I turned to leave, when I heard the singing again. It was Logan.

_Now I can see your pain_

_I'm sorry_

_Goodbye_

_I cried so hard_

_Now I can see your pain_

_I'm sorry_

_Goodbye_

_I cried tonight_

I followed the singing, until I found him. My heart almost stopped at the sight of him. He was standing at the edge of the roof, about to jump to his death.

"Logan" I whispered

He didn't hear me, just continued singing to himself and crying. He put one foot over the other and prepared to jump.

"Logan stop!" I yelled.

He turned around to face me.

"James go away this doesn't concern you" he said

"Yes it does Logan, please don't"

He ignored me and turned back to face the edge of the building.

"YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS!" I screamed.

"Yes I do" he said

"NO YOU DONT DAMNIT"

"YES I DO!"

"YOU CANT"

"THEN WHY NOT!" he screamed

"B-BECAUSE!"

"THATS NOT A GOOD REASON JAMES!

"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU DAMNIT! I yelled.

"Y-you love me" he whispered.

I sighed. "I love you so much, ever since that kiss."

"But I thought it didn't mean anything"

"Well it did to me, Logan I love you so much. Please don't leave me…please"

"I have to James, I'm not happy. This is the only way everything will return to normal"

"Logan this wont solve anything, you will only be hurting the people that love and care about you" I said

"You guys don't care about me" he said

I rushed over to him and pulled him into a hug. "I'll prove I love you"

"James you don't love me so just…"

I quickly pressed my lips to his. His lips were soft and moist, probably from his tears, but I didn't care. I have been waiting for this for a long time. He kissed me back gently, and I knew I won him. We let go after a few seconds for air.

"You really do love me"

"Of course I love you, I need to be with you""But I'm with Kendall" he said

"Then leave him"

"Its not that easy, I love him"

"But he just hurts you, why would you want to go back to that"

"Because James I love him and…"

"Please Logan be with me, let me show I'm the one for you" I said

"I don't know"

"Then what does you heart say"

"Please James don't do this, you know I love Kendall"

"Then why did you kiss me twice, I know you love me Logan" I said

"I do love you James, but I cant leave Kendall" he said

"Are you afraid if you leave, he will hurt you?" I asked.

He didn't answer me.

I grabbed him by the shoulders. "Logan tell me"

He started crying. "Yes I'm afraid he will hurt me if I go with you, I cant have that James, I just cant"

"Logan I promise you he wont hurt you if you leave, I will make sure of it" I said

"But you told me that before and I- I still got hurt"

"No I swear on my life that I will protect you, just please believe me"

"I cant James"

"Please Logan I need you, I love you so much. Just give me a chance"

"But what about Kendall?" he asked

"We can go out and then you can tell him when your ready" I said

"I cant go out with both of you at the same time"

"Yes you can, besides you wont have to for long"

"I don't know James"

"Please Logan, think of what we could be"

He sat down on the ledge and started crying. I sat down next to him.

"Logan, what's wrong?"

"Do you know how many times I've thought of the idea of us?"

"You've thought about it?"

"Yeah, James when you were there for me, I felt loved and cared for. That's how I was meant to be treated, but Kendall never treated me like he loved me, but you did" he said

"That's because I love you, please don't go back with Kendall. Go with me" I said before leaning in.

He followed me and our lips met once again. We sat there in the cool night, kissing till we both needed air.

"So what do you say Logan?" I asked.

He sighed. "I'll…I'll give you a chance"

"Thank you Logan, you wont regret it. I promise I will make you happy and never abuse you"

"You promise James"

"I promise Logan, I love you"

He snuggled into my chest. "I love you too"

I smiled and wrapped my arms around him.

"Logan please stop hurting yourself, it kills me to see you in so much pain"

"I'm sorry, I just didn't feel loved and…"

I gave him a peck on the lips. "Well I love you"

He smiled. Which made me smile back. It seems like I haven't seen him smile in forever. We sat there for the rest of the night, I didn't want to move from this spot. He finally fell asleep in my arms, and was snoring softly. I smiled and rested my head on top of his.

"I love you Logan"

**A/N:Ok i got so many reviews asking for kogan and jagan. so since i couldnt decide, i finally decided i would do both. there will be a little bit of jagan, then it will be back with kogan. i have to end it with kogan because i love it so much anyway. please dnt hate me for the choice i made, but it kinda seems like everyone wins...well sorta. please enjoy =D. sorry if there is errors, i didnt have time to fix it. 1: logan said he liked japanese food, so i went with it.**


	19. Chapter 19

**Kendall's POV**

I woke up the next morning feeling relaxed and calm. I sat up in bed and stretched.

I yawned. "Morning Logie"

I didn't get a response, so I figured he was still asleep. I turned to face his side of the room, but he wasn't there.

"_He must already be up" _I thought.

I climbed out of bed and grabbed my clothes for the day. I entered the bathroom to take a quick shower. I gasped and dropped my clothes. The sink and floor were covered in blood, and there was a razor laying on the counter. My eyes widened when I realized Logan had done this. He was cutting himself, and I didn't even know it. James was right about Logan, he wasn't fine at all. He needed our help.

"James, Carlos!" I screamed as I ran into the living room.

Carlos opened the door to his room and walked in rubbing his eyes.

"What is it Kendall?" he asked.

"LOGAN'S GONE!" I yelled.

"What do you mean he's gone?"

"I don't know where he is and there is blood all over the bathroom"

"I'll get James" he said before running into his room.

I waited impatiently for him to return with James. I didn't have to wait long. A few minutes later he ran back into the living room.

"James is gone too" he said

"WHERE THE FUCK ARE THEY!" I yelled.

"Kendall calm down, their probably fine" Carlos said.

"Carlos how can they be fine, Logan is fucking cutting himself. For all I know he could be dead" I snapped.

"Don't say that, I bet James went to go find him" he said.

"But why James, I should be the one helping Logan, not him"

"Yeah but James is his friend and…"

"Well I'm his fucking boyfriend. There's a difference"

Carlos didn't say anything.

I sighed. "I'm gonna go find him"

"I'm coming with you" he said.

We both headed for the door, but before I could open it, it opened on its own. James walked in carrying a sleeping Logan.

"Oh my god, what happened?" I asked.

"I found him on the roof" James said as he gently laid Logan on the couch.

"What was he doing up there?" Carlos asked.

"He was trying to kill himself, but luckily I reached him in time" James said.

I was happy James saved Logan's life, but I was also angry with him. It was my job to protect Logan not him, Logan was mine not his. Carlos noticed the look I was giving James and he nudged me in the side.

"Well Kendall" Carlos said.

"Um thanks James" I said.

"No problem, but we have to watch out for him" James said.

"Well I think I can take it from here" I said as I carefully lifted Logan in my arms.

"What are you doing?" James asked.

"I'm just taking him to his bed, it would be more comfortable. don't you think"

"Yeah of course, just be careful with him"

"I think I know how to take care of my own boyfriend" I said

James gave me look, and I knew I pissed him off. I rolled my eyes and walked into my bedroom. I gently placed Logan on his bed, and his eyes fluttered open.

"Kendall, what's going on?" he asked.

"Shh everything is ok Logie" I said.

"What happened?"

"James found you on the roof"

His eyes widened in shock and by the look on his face, it seemed he didn't want me to know something.

"Logie are you okay?" I asked.

"Yeah I'm fine, I'm sorry Kendall" he said

"For what babe"

"For going on the roof, I wasn't feeling good and I needed some air"

"Logie, James told me what you were trying to do"

His chocolate colored eyes filled up with tears and he looked down. "I'm sorry Kendall"

"But why were you trying to kill yourself?" I asked.

"Because I didn't feel like living anymore"

"Well that's selfish"

He looked up at me. "What do you mean?"

"If you killed yourself, everyone would've missed you. That would've been a very selfish thing to do" I said.

"I know that now, I'm sorry"

I pulled him into a hug. "Why did you want to kill yourself anyway?"

"Because…I didn't feel loved"

"But Logie you are loved"

"I know, James showed me"

I let him go. "What?"

"Well he told me that everyone did care about me and…"

"But you said showed" I said cutting him off.

He sighed. "Kendall nothing happened, why cant you trust me"

"I'm sorry Logie, I just don't like the fact that you guys were alone" I said.

"But James doesn't like me that way, we're only friends"

I sighed. "Yeah your right, I'm sorry"

He gave me a peck on the lips. "Its ok"

"But please Logie don't ever do that again"

"I wont"

"And no more cutting yourself either"

"Kendall I promise I wont"

I smiled and gave him another kiss. "Ok, now get some rest"

He nodded and laid down. I gave him a kiss on the forehead.

"I love you Logie"

"I…..I love you too"

I smiled and left the room. What bothered me was that he hesitated when he said he loved me. Why would he do that? Even though he claims nothing happened between him and James, I was finding it hard to believe him. But I had to believe him…for now. I made sure to clean up the bathroom before my mom saw it. I didn't want her to find out about Logan's little stunt. After everything looked decent, I decided to go down to the pool.

"Hey Carlos, you wanna go to the pool?" I asked.

"Hell yeah! Let me change" he said before running to his room.

"What about you?" I asked James.

He looked up from the couch. "Nah I think I'll stay here"

I raised an eyebrow. "Really? But you love going down to the pool, you know to flirt with girls and stuff"

"Well I don't feel like it, and besides I don't want Logan to be left alone" he said.

Just him mentioning Logan's name made me angry. I didn't feel comfortable with him being alone with my boyfriend. But I had to trust both Logan and James, even if I didn't want to.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Yeah, you guys have fun though"

"Aw your not coming" Carlos said as he entered the living room.

"Sorry Carlitos I'm gonna stay here"

"Oh" Carlos said as he bowed his head.

I couldn't help but notice have sad Carlos looked. He must really need James with him all the time. Either they were really close or Carlos had a crush on James. Maybe they should get together, then I wouldn't be so worried about Logan and James.

"Ok then I guess we'll see you later" Carlos said as he headed towards the door.

I gave James one last look, then followed Carlos out of the apartment.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Huh? Oh yeah….I'm fine" Carlos said.

"You don't look fine"

"Well its just I wanted James to hang out with us. He doesn't need to be with Logan 24/7"

Carlos was jealous. He did like James, but I wasn't going to pressure him into telling me, he will tell us all eventually.

I put my arm around his shoulder. "Its ok Carlos, we can still have fun"

He sighed. "Yeah your right"

We reached the pool and took our usual seats. The sun was shining bright and the temperature was actually bearable.

I sighed as I sat in one of the lounge chairs. "This is nice"

Carlos laid in the chair next to me. "It is really relaxing"

I started thinking about Logan. I hope he was ok and still asleep. But James said he would watch him. I growled at the thought of James and Logan. I guess you could say I was jealous. James was the pretty one of the group, so I felt a little self-conscious. Maybe Logan did like James, I mean all the girls did. I wasn't anything special, just a natural born leader. But that could never compare to James and his looks. Just thinking about Logan and James made me feel nervous and angry. I needed to make sure nothing was going on between them.

"Hey Carlos I forgot the sunscreen, I'll be right back" I said.

Carlos nodded. "Ok, but hurry up"

I left the pool and headed back to the apartment. I quietly opened the door, not wanting to make too much noise and then I don't catch them in the act. Hopefully they weren't doing anything. James was no longer sitting on the couch and watching TV, which made me suspicious.

"Hey James you here?" I asked as I entered his room.

But the room was completely empty. I went back into the living room.

"Hello? James you her…."

I stopped when I heard voices coming from the hallway. I went towards the hallway and heard the voices coming from mine and Logan's room. I got this uneasy feeling in my stomach. I moved closer to the door and pressed my ear to it.

"James I don't think we should do this" I heard Logan say.

"Logan relax, Kendall is down by the pool and the apartment is empty" James said.

"Yeah but I still haven't told him about us" Logan said.

"Its fine, you can break up with him when he returns or something" James said

I couldn't believe it, Logan was with James and going to dump me. But I thought he loved me.

"I don't know James, I still love him" Logan said

"But I bet he doesn't love you like the way I do" James said

I heard Logan sigh. "Ok fine, but I'm scared to do this. Kendall never did it properly"

"I'll be gentle I promise, trust me I'll bring you pleasure not pain" James said.

I quietly opened the door a little so I could see. Logan was sitting on his bed, but was making out with James. He held on to James tightly and ran his fingers through his hair. James gently lowered Logan on his back and took both his and Logan's shirt off. Logan started to moan as James planted kisses on his neck and chest. I wanted to leave and go back to the pool. But I was in so much shock, that I couldn't move. My eyes were glued to the scene in front of me. I couldn't believe my boyfriend and best friend would do this. I hated them so much right now, even though I wasn't supposed to, I did. I managed to quickly turn my head as James removed both his pants and Logan's.

"Ok Logan just relax, I promise to be gentle" James said

Logan didn't say anything so I assumed he nodded or something. I turned my head back in their direction when I heard Logan cry out.

"Ah…James"

"Logan its just my finger, now just breathe and relax" James said

I watched as James continued to finger Logan, then he started thrusting into him slowly.

"Wow Logan, your not as tight as I would've thought" James said.

"I guess you can thank Kendall for that" Logan said

I clutched my hands into fists. I was beyond angry right now. Logan and James were a bunch of fucking liars, literately. I heard Logan moan louder and let out a few screams every now and then.

"Oh g-god James….harder…fuck me harder p-please" Logan moaned.

James started thrusting into Logan harder and faster, making Logan cry out his name each time. I finally couldn't take it and I managed to walk away. I slammed the front door on my way out and I didn't care if they heard or not. At least it would make them stop. I went back to the pool and found Carlos the same way I left him.

"What took you so long?" Carlos asked.

"I couldn't find it" I said.

"Ok, how is Logan doing?"

"Much, much better"

"That's good, I guess James is helping him"

"You have no idea"

We continued to relax by the pool, but I couldn't stop thinking about what I just saw. Logan and James were fucking when I wasn't around, how long has this been going on? I was so pissed that I felt like marching back up there and beating the shit out of Logan. And if James tried to stop me, he would get it too. But I knew I couldn't do that, I promised my mom and Logan I was going to stop. But since Logan broke his promise to me, its only fair if I do the same, right? I promise myself I will get Logan back. I don't know how or when, but I will bet him back.

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***

The next day we had rehearsal, which no one seemed happy about. I did my best to focus on the songs and dance moves, but I could only concentrate on what I was going to do to Logan. To my surprise even Logan was doing bad. He kept screwing up both the songs and dance moves. But I finally figured out why. Every time James would "accidentally" brush against Logan, he would blush and mess up whatever it was we were doing. Sometimes I would glare at both Logan and James, and a few times Logan caught me. He would give me a confused look and I would just turn away. Finally after ten hours of work we got to go home.

"Dogs! I need to talk to you" Gustavo said.

Damn so close.

We sighed and turned back to face him.

"I need Kendall and Logan to stay behind, you two can go" he said

"Wait how will we get home, Kendall drove us here" Carlos said.

Gustavo rolled his eyes. "Kelly will take you home"

Carlos and James nodded. Before they left, James turned back to look at Logan, which Logan smiled letting him know everything was ok.

I rolled my eyes and turned back to Gustavo. "Why do we have to stay?"

"Because you were AWFUL!" he yelled.

Logan and I jumped.

"Are you sure?" logan asked timidly.

"Of course I'm sure, now I'm going to make you work more" Gustavo said.

I looked at the clock then back at Gustavo. "But its already five thirty"

"But its already five thirty, I DON'T CARE!" Gustavo yelled.

I sighed in defeat. "Then what do we do first?"

"Just a few songs and dancing"Gusatvo said

We followed Gustavo back into the studio, to work on the songs. After a hour and a half of singing, we had to still dance. Logan and I did much better this time, and was glad we got to go home. For real this time. By the time we actually finished, it was starting to get dark. We walked back to the car and climbed inside. Logan didn't say anything the whole time. I decided this was the perfect time to get revenge.

"Hey Logie, do you mind if I take a short cut?" I asked.

He looked at me. "There's a short cut?"

"Yeah I found out about it the other day"

"Then why haven't you used it before?"

"Eh I don't know"

He nodded and turned his head to the other direction.

"Your really talkative" I said

"I don't feel like talking"

"_If it was James you would_" I thought.

We were almost to the Palm Woods, but instead of making a left, I went right. This of course was my plan. I was going to pretend to take a short cut, then get Logan as far away from the Palm Woods as possible. I kept driving until I was almost on the other side of L.A.

"Hey Kendall, are you sure this is a short cut?" Logan asked.

"Yeah it is Logie" I said

He gave me a puzzled look. "But why is it taking so long?"

"Don't worry Logie, we'll be there in a few minutes"

"Ok well wake me up when we get there"

After ten minutes of driving, I finally reached my destination. I pulled into an empty parking lot and shut the engine off.

Logan opened his eyes and yawned. "Are we here?"

I smiled. "Yup"

He looked around at least twice before turning to face me. My Logie looked so cute when he was confused.

"Um Kendall, where are we?"

"In a parking lot" I said

"But I thought we were going home"

"We were, but I thought we could talk for a bit"

"Kendall we can talk at home" he said

"But not alone we cant, James and Carlos will interrupt us" I said

"Please Kendall take me home, I'm tired and I promise you we can talk tomorrow"

I laughed. "You say that all the time"

"Say what?"

"Oh Kendall I promise this, I promise that. Its gets old Logan"

"I keep my promises" he said.

"Uh huh, of course you do"

"Well what about you? You haven't kept any of your promises"

"I haven't touched you in a week, so don't say I break my promises"

"Oooh a week, come back when its been at least a few months" he said

I rolled my eyes. "God Logan your unbelievable"

"Fine then I'll leave" he said while opening the door.

I quickly grabbed his hand. "No Logie wait"

"Let me go"

I pulled him back into the car and climbed on top of him.

"Kendall get off me"

"Why Logie, I thought you like getting fucked."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

I placed my finger on his lips. "Shh its ok, just relax. I promise I will be gentle"

"Kendall please don't do this"

"Aw come on Logie, let me just fuck ya"

"Get away from me!" he screamed.

I quickly covered his mouth with my hand. "Logie you don't want people to hear us, do you?"

He shook his head and I could see his eyes fill up with tears. With my free hand I undid his jeans and pulled them down to his knees.

"Alright Logie I'm gonna remove my hand and your gonna stay quiet, ok" I said.

He nodded and I slowly removed my hand from his mouth. Luckily he didn't scream, but if he did no one could hear him.

"Now Logan just relax"

"No please Kendall don't do this"

"Why, don't you like getting fucked? Because that's what I thought"

He didn't say anything so I took that as the ok to continue. I lowered his pants to his ankles and then reached for the hem of his boxers.

"K-Kendall don't"

"Its ok Logie, I'll be careful"

I pulled his boxers down and undid my pants. I lowered my boxers to my knees and positioned myself at his entrance. I slowly pushed in and watched as Logan held on tightly to the car seat.

"Wow Logan your not as tight as I would've thought, I guess I'll thank James for that later" I said.

He started crying. "I'm so sorry Kendall, please…."

"Logan shut up, I don't want to hear it. I just want to hear you scream my name"

"Please Kendall st…"

I cut him off by thrusting into him with a strong force.

"I'm sorry Logie what did you say? Kendall fuck me harder"

"No I said stop"

"Mmm no it sounded like you said for me to fuck you harder" I said.

"I never said that"

"Then maybe you should" I said while thrusting into him deeper.

"Kendall….please…ngh"

"Please what Logie"

He started whimpering and I could see tears fall down his face.

"Aw come on Logie, its just one word"

"Fuck" he whispered.

"What was that?"

"Fuck me" he said a little louder.

"Still cant hear ya babe"

"Fuck me!" he screamed.

"As you wish" I said.

I started pumping into him with so much force, I could tell I was getting close. But I didn't want it to end this quick.

"Come on baby I know you want it"

"I want it" he said.

I smiled and continued thrusting, but each thrust was hard and fast. He gasped when I hit his prostate.

"You like that don't you" I said.

He nodded his head. I pulled out oh him then slammed into him, hitting his prostate dead on.

"Kendall!" he screamed.

I smiled and continued pumping him hard. I could tell I was close.

"Don't worry Logie, almost done"

I slammed into him one last time and came inside him. I made sure that my seed covered every inch of him. I pulled out of him and put my pants back on.

"How was that Logie?"

"F-fine" he said while also picking his pants up.

I frowned. "That's all I get"

"Kendall you said you wouldn't do that anymore"

"Yeah but this time you asked for it"

"Because you made me, I didn't want this"

"Then why do you let James fuck you, but not your own boyfriend"

"I-I'm sorry Kendall but…"

"Whatever Logie"

"I'm trying to tell you something" he said.

"Well I don't want to hear it"

"Your such an asshole!" he screamed.

"And you're a fucking slut Logan" I said.

"I fucking hate you!" he yelled.

I turned to face him. "What?"

"You heard me"

I glared at him then punched him in the face. He let out a cry as blood came out of his nose.

"Y-you promised"

"Shut the fuck up Logan. You've made me promises, but you broke them all" I said.

"I don't want to be with you anymore" he said before getting out of the car.

"Hey you cant walk away from me!" I yelled as I too got out if the car.

He ignored me and continued walking away from me.

"Logan come here!" I yelled.

He turned around and screamed. "No I don't want you anymore!"

I ran up to him and held him tightly by his shoulders. "Don't leave me"

"I don't want you"

"But I thought you loved me?" I asked.

"So did I, but you know what I don't. So just leave me the fuck alone" he said.

"No you cant walk away from me"

"Watch me" he said coolly.

I got even more angry with him, and I tried not to hit him. But I couldn't control myself, I had to do, I just had to. I finally gave into my anger and punched him in the face. The impact of the punch caused him to fall hard to the ground, and some of his blood to land on my face.

"L-Logie?" I said

He didn't move, just laid there. I went into panic mode.

"No Logie get up"

Still nothing.

I kneeled beside him. "Logie please, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, please wake up"

I shook him gently, but he still didn't move.

"Wake up!" I screamed.

I started crying. I couldn't believe what I just did. I grabbed his wrist and looked for a pulse. I sighed in relief when I found one. I quickly picked him up and put him back in the car.

"Its ok Logie, I'm taking you home now"

I jumped into the drivers side and looked over at him. He looked awful, especially with all that blood splattered on his face.

I slammed my fist on the dashboard. "Fuck!"

I started the car and sped back to the Palm Woods. When I reached the Palm Woods, I pulled up behind it. I didn't want James and Carlos to see this. Hell I didn't want anyone to see what I did. I lifted Logan in my arms and brought him inside. Since I snuck in from the back, no one saw me. I was praying that the apartment was empty or that everyone was asleep. I reached apartment 2J and went inside. The apartment was quiet, so I assumed everyone was sleeping. I rushed into our bedroom and laid Logan on his bed. I ran into the bathroom and got a wet washcloth.

"Its ok Logie" I said as I wiped his face.

I undressed him and put his pajamas on. Once he was cleaned up, I covered him with the blankets. I climbed into to bed with him and held him tightly.

"I'm so sorry Logie" I said as I rocked him back and forth.

I heard the front door open then close. I quickly let go of Logan and ran into the living room. Carlos and James were laughing but stopped when I entered the living room.

"Dude what the hell happened to you?" Carlos asked.

"Huh?"

"You have blood all over your face" James said.

"Oh um… I fell while trying a new dance move" I lied.

James didn't look convinced, but he went along with it.

"Where's Logan?" he asked.

"He's asleep, Gustavo really tired us out"

"Ok well I'll see you tomorrow" he said before going to his room.

"Goodnight Kendall" Carlos said before following James.

"Goodnight" I said.

I went back into my room and closed the door. I walked over to my bed and collapsed on it. I turned to face Logan. He looked so pale and lifeless. I felt tears come to my eyes and quickly turned to face the wall. I didn't want to see him like this. I turned off the light and let my tears fall.

"I'm so sorry Logie"


	20. Chapter 20

**James POV**

I was a little nervous about Logan having to stay late with Gustavo. Its not him with Gustavo that bothered me, it was the fact that he would be alone with Kendall, and I didn't want Logan to get hurt. Especially since I wasn't going to be there to protect him. Before Carlos and I left Rocque Records, I looked back at Logan. He gave me a smile that said everything was ok. I nodded and left with Carlos and Kelly. When we got back to the Palm Woods, we decided to go down to the pool. I didn't feel going but since I didn't go with Carlos last time, I went with him. Why did he have to give me the sad puppy dog look?

"Hey Carlos, do you think Logan is ok?" I asked as we took our seats in the lounge chairs.

"Yeah he's fine James" he said.

I sighed. "Maybe I should call him"

"Dude we just left"

"I know but I'm afraid Kendall will hurt him or something"

"Just relax and try not to think about it. He's perfectly fine"

I nodded and tried to relax. I managed to calm down and enjoy my free time with Carlos. I was glad I had him around to help me and make me feel better. Carlos was the greatest person ever, I couldn't have asked for a better friend. Once it started getting dark we decided to go back to the apartment. Carlos and I were laughing all the way back up. I opened the door and saw Kendall run into the living room.

"Dude what the hell happened to you?" Carlos asked.

"Huh?" Kendall said.

"You have blood all over your face" I said.

"Oh um…I fell while trying a new dance move" Kendall said.

I eyed him suspiciously. There is no way Gustavo made them work that hard, right? Something was up and I needed to know what it was. Kendall must've noticed the way I was looking at him, so I decided to go along with his story.

"Where's Logan?" I asked.

"He's asleep, Gustavo really tired us out" Kendall said.

Ok well I'll see you tomorrow" I said before going to my room.

"Goodnight Kendall" Carlos said as he followed me.

"Goodnight" Kendall said.

Once Carlos and I were in our room, I waited till I heard the door to Logan and Kendall's room close.

"Hey Carlos"

"Yeah"

"Don't you think Kendall was acting weird?" I asked.

"Um not really, why?" Carlos asked.

"Well first of all he had blood all over his face"

"He said he fell"

"Then what about Logan being asleep"

"Oh god James, your not blaming Kendall for something are you?" Carlos asked.

"Well Carlos his story doesn't make sense" I said.

"James stop worrying, nothing happened"

I sighed. "Ok. Hey I'm gonna get water"

"Ok can you get me some fruit smackers?" Carlos asked.

"I'm not going all the way down to the lobby"

Carlos rolled his eyes. "Then never mind"

I went into the kitchen and got a glass of water. While I was going back to my room, I noticed a weird spot on the carpet. I went over to inspect the stain. As I got closer I realized it was blood. The first thing that popped in my head was that Kendall hurt Logan again. I clutched my hands into fists and stormed into the room Logan and Kendall shared. I opened the door to their room and saw Logan passed out on his bed and Kendall laying in his. i glared at Kendall when i heard what he said.

"I'm so sorry Logie"

I was right he did hurt Logan, but i wasnt going to let him get away with it. I walked over to Kendall and pulled him out of bed.

"James what the hell" Kendall said.

"What the hell did you do to Logan!" I yelled.

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh don't act like you don't know anything, his blood is on the fucking carpet"

"Wait what?"

I was getting really impatient with him so much that I decided to punch him.

"What the fuck James!" he said while holding his nose.

"What did you do?" I asked.

"I didn't mean to, but he was being a little slut so…"

"He is not a slut!"

"Then why did he fuck you?"

"He didn't do anything, it was me"

"Whatever James, he's still a fucking slut in my eyes"

I punched Kendall again till he fell to the floor, and I jumped on top of him. I kept punching him over and over.

"Don't ever call him that again!" I yelled as I hit him a few more times in the face.

"James stop!"

I stopped and turned to see Carlos standing in the doorway crying.

"No Carlos he deserves it"

I continued punching Kendall until I felt someone grab me and pull me off him.

"L-look what you did" Carlos said.

I turned back to Kendall and was shocked that I knocked him out.

"Shit!" I said.

"Why did you do that?" Carlos asked.

I pointed at Logan. "Look what he did to him"

Carlos didn't say anything, just stared in shock at the sight of our friend. He started shaking and crying harder. I sighed and walked over to Logan. He looked horrible and a giant bruise was starting to form on his face. I gently picked him up and carried him to my room. Carlos stayed behind to help Kendall. I went into my room and sat on my bed, with Logan in my arms. I held him tightly and spoke to him softly.

"I love you Logan, I'm here for you. I promise I will never let anything bad happen to you again. I'm so sorry, I cant believe I broke my promise again. But I swear that Kendall will never touch you again."

I continued rocking him gently until I fell asleep.

**Logan's POV**

I opened my eyes and looked around. I was surprised that I was in James bed. I tried to sit up, but my whole body ached, and then I remembered why. Everything that happened last night came back. I felt tears come to my eyes at the thought of what Kendall did. He promised me he would stop, but he didn't. I felt so stupid for believing he would change and even for taking him back. I slowly managed to get out of bed and go into the bathroom. I looked in the mirror and gasped. On the right side of my face was a giant bruise. It was a lot bigger then previous ones. I gently touched it and winced. This bruise hurt far more then other ones I have received. I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. As I did this, I felt something wet and sticky. I touched the spot where I felt this and looked at my hand. On my hand there was blood. Then I remembered how hard Kendall hit me. He had punched me so hard that I fell to the ground. I felt like crying again, but I knew I needed to be strong.

After I took a shower and was dressed, I went into the living room. James and Carlos weren't here, so I figured they went to the pool. Even Mrs. Knight and Katie weren't in the apartment. I thought for sure Kendall would be here, but he wasn't either. That's just like him. He always beats me then runs away. I sat on the couch and placed my head in my lap. I tried to hold back the tears, but I couldn't do it any longer. I started sobbing uncontrollably, then even choking on my sobs. My life wasn't supposed to be like this. I should be enjoying my life, not wanting to end it. If I could just get away from the thing that's hurting me, then everything would be fine. Right now I needed one person more then anything, and that person was James. But I didn't want to go down to the pool looking as bad as I did now. I guess I was going to have to wait till he returned.

I laid down and continued to cry. I stopped crying when I heard the doorknob to the front door turn. I sat up quickly, hoping to see James walk through the door, so I could run up to him and he could hold me tightly and tell me everything was gonna be ok. But as the door opened, my face fell. It wasn't James at all. But the one person I dreaded seeing. It was Kendall.

He sighed in relief when he saw me. "Oh thank god Logie your ok"

I rolled my eyes and stood up from the couch. I didn't want to be here with Kendall alone, so I decided to go find James. I walked over to the door, but was grabbed by Kendall.

"What the hell is your problem?" he asked.

"You! You promised you wouldn't hurt me anymore, but you broke all your promises. Ever since we started dating you've made my life hell. I'm done with you!" I yelled.

"No your not! Not we're done till I say we are!" He yelled.

"Just let me go!"

"Why? so you can run and fuck your precious James?"

"God Kendall your so stupid! Shut up! Just shut the fuck up!" I screamed before hitting him in the face.

He let me go and backed away.

"L-Logie?"

"No Kendall I don't want to hear it, we're through. James has made me happy, something you couldn't do. All you've ever done is beat and rape me. You have hurt me not only physically, but emotionally. I lost my baby because of you and I'm sick of having to live like this."

I started crying again and I could see the guilt in his eyes, but I didn't care. He would never change for me.

"I don't want to do this anymore, we're over and I'm with James now. He's has actually showed he loves and cares for me."

"So that's it? W-we're done?" Kendall asked.

I nodded and walked out of the apartment. I didn't care if he was hurt, he had hurt me far worse then I have to him. I didn't even care what he had to say to me, his words meant nothing to me. Once I walked out of the apartment and away from Kendall, I felt relief. Something I haven't felt in a long long time.

**Kendall's POV**

I couldn't believe Logan and I were done. The one person that I loved and needed was gone, and it was all my fault. I never meant for our relationship to end up like this. We were supposed to be together forever, because we were meant for each other. How could I have been so fucking stupid to let the best thing that's ever happen to me, just walk away. But I knew if I tried to get him back, he wouldn't give me another chance. He has given me so many and I blew them all. I felt tears come to my eyes and I let them fall. I know I'm supposed to be the strong one of the group, but I cant when I just lost the most important thing in my life. I fell to the floor and curled up into a ball. I started crying harder when I realized I was laying on the spot where Logan's blood was. I couldn't believe I did this to him. I was a monster. No one could help me. Everyone was probably afraid to help or even get near me, because they were scared I would turn on them. But this wasn't me at all, the old me would never harm anyone. I needed to change for my friends and family. Even if Logan wasn't mine anymore, I was still going to change for him. I started sobbing harder, so much that it hurt.

"I'm sorry Logie. I don't deserve you"

**A/N:Okay i feel pretty bad for Kendall now, but things will change. oh and sorry that this chapter was so short, but i have other ideas that i didnt want in this chapter. anyway i still hope everyone liked it =D. i will try and update tomorrow =D**


	21. Chapter 21

**James POV**

Carlos and I left the pool and were making our way through the lobby. We were laughing about what Carlos said about Bitters, but that stopped when we saw Logan walking towards us. He seemed upset about something and was crying because of it. I quickly ran up to him and pulled him into a hug.

"Logan are you ok?" I asked.

"Yeah I'm ok" he said into my shoulder.

"But why are you crying?"

"Because I did it"

I pulled away and held him by his shoulders. "Did what?"

"I broke up with Kendall. We're over for good" he said.

I smiled and gave him another hug. "I'm so glad you did"`

He nodded. "Me too"

"But if you broke up with him, shouldn't you be happy?"

"Yeah"

"Then why are you crying?"

"Because….I still love him"

I sighed. "I know, but don't worry you will forget about him"

"But w-what if I cant" he said

"Then I guess we shouldn't be together"

"No! James I need you. I'm sorry"

"Logan its ok, I understand. But don't worry we will make it work" I said.

He smiled. "Thank you James."

"Now come on lets go upstairs"

The three of us went back up to the apartment. I opened the door and found Kendall sitting on the couch with his head in his lap. He looked up at us then quickly went into his room.

I rolled my eyes. "Its his own fault"

Logan sighed and sat down on the couch. I walked over and sat next to him.

"Logan everything will be ok" I said.

"But James I'm scared. What if he hurts me?" he said.

I put my arm around him. "Don't worry, I'll make sure he wont"

"But what if he does when your asleep or something?"

"Then switch rooms"

"What?"

"Move into my room. Carlos can go with Kendall" I said.

"I-I don't know James"

"Aw come on Logan, at least you'll be safe"

"Ok I'll do it"

I smiled and gave him a kiss on the lips. I heard Carlos huff and storm off to our room. I sighed and stood up from the couch.

"I'll fix this"

I walked into the bedroom to find Carlos sitting on his bed with his arms crossed.

"Carlos are you ok?" I asked.

"Why did you do that?" he asked.

"Do what?"

"Tell Logan he can switch rooms, this is mine and your room. Not yours and Logan's"

"Yeah but he needs to feel safe and this will help with that"

"Psh yeah right, it because your dating"

I frowned and sat next to him. "Are you jealous?"

"No its just that….that I don't want to leave" he said.

"Carlos its on the other side of the apartment, its not that far"

"Yeah but I'm not that close to Kendall like Logan is, and besides what if he hurts me too"

"Don't worry that wont happen"

"Please James don't make me leave"

"I'm sorry Carlos, but Logan needs me right now"

Carlos sighed. "I need you too"

I grabbed his hands and looked into his eyes. "I know, but please Carlos do this for me. Please"

"Fine I'll switch with Logan"

I smiled and gave him a hug. "Thanks man you're the best"

"Yeah I guess, but now you have to tell Kendall" he said.

I pulled away and sighed. "Lets see how he takes it"

I knocked a few times on Kendall's bedroom door, but didn't get an answer.

"Kendall open the door, we need to talk" I said.

"Go away I have nothing to say to you" he said.

"Please its about Logan"

A few seconds later the door opened.

"What about him?"

"Can I come in at least?"

He nodded and I went into his room. He closed the door and turned to face me.

"So what about Logan?"

"I asked him to switch rooms and he said yes" I said

"What do you mean?"

"He will stay with me and Carlos will move in here with you"

"No! No way!"

"Kendall he doesn't want to stay with you. Besides you guys broke up anyway" I said.

"Yeah but that doesn't mean we cant still be friends" he said.

"Your missing the point. He cant be around you"

"And why not?"

"Because you've changed and he doesn't want to get hurt"

"Hasn't he realized that he hurt me too"

"How the hell has he hurt you?" I asked.

"When he cheated on me and then dumped me"

"You cheated on him first with Jo. And I'm glad he broke up with you. At least now he can get the love and respect he deserves" I said.

"Get out James"

"Not until I get some of Logan's things"

"Get the fuck out!" he screamed.

"No"

"I swear if you don't leave I will fuck up your pretty little face"

"Go ahead, I'm not afraid of you"

"Then I will hurt the thing that means the most to you" he said.

I got right in his face that our noses were almost touching. "If you touch Logan I will hurt you"

He laughed. "I'd like to see you try"

"Really Kendall, you don't think I would. I've done it so many time before"

He didn't say anything, just glared at me. I walked over to Logan's side of the room and started gathering some of his things. Once I had a few of his things, I headed towards the door.

"You cant take Logan away from me" Kendall said.

"I already did" I said before leaving the room.

"How'd it go?" Logan asked as I entered the living room.

"I took care of it" I said.

"So does this mean I'm staying with you?"

I smiled. "Yup and he cant do anything about it"

He stood up from the couch and gave me a hug. "Thank you so much James"

"No problem, now here's some of your things" I said while handing him some of his stuff.

He took his things and went into his new bedroom. We spent the rest of the day helping Logan move out of his old room and helped Carlos move into his new one. Kendall got mad and left the apartment. I didn't care if he left, at least he wasnt in our way. That night I laid in my bed thinking about Logan. I didn't have to worry about him that much anymore. He was finally away from Kendall and was safe with me.

"James"

I turned to face Logan.

"Yeah"

"Can I sleep with you?" he asked.

"Of course you can"

He got out of his bed and climbed into bed with me. He snuggled under my arms and I couldn't help but smile.

"I love you" he whispered.

"I love you too" I said.

"James you wont hurt me, right?"

"I promise I wont"

"But what if…."

"Logan I swear I will never hurt you, I love you ok"

"Please James don't break this promise" he said.

I gave him a kiss on the head. "Don't worry, I wont do that to you"

"You promise"

"Yes everything is going to be ok"

"Ok" he said before falling asleep

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR****BTR***BTR

"Logan, babe are you ok?" I asked.

"Yeah I'm fine" he said from inside the kitchen-bathroom.

I frowned. He was lying to me. Something was wrong with him and he wasn't telling me. Its been two months since Logan and I have been going out, and I was surprised Kendall hasn't done anything about it. I wasn't that worried about Logan now that he was with me, but now since he was sick, I was scared. He has been throwing up everything he consumes and has even fainted a few times. I've tried convincing him to go to the hospital, but he claims he is fine. I opened door to the bathroom to see Logan sitting on the floor with his head resting on the toilet.

"Babe are you ok?" I asked.

"Yeah I'm ok, its just a little stomach bug" he said.

"You sure you don't want to go to the hospital?"

He shook his head. "James I'm fine, don't worry about me"

I kneeled down beside him. "I cant help it, if anything happened to you I don't know what I'd do"

He chuckled. "James its just the flu, its nothing serious"

"But I don't like seeing you like this"

"I know, but I'll be better soon"

I nodded and gave him a kiss on the lips. He quickly pulled away.

"I cant believe you just did that" he said.

"Did what?"

"Kissed me after I just puked."

I chuckled. "I don't care"

He smiled and gave me another kiss. I gently lowered him on his back. He ran his fingers through my hair as my tongue explored every inch of his mouth. I let myself get carried away and stuck my tongue down his throat.

"James stop" he said while pushing me away.

"Why?"

He quickly sat up and leaned over the toilet. He started puking again and I ran to get him a towel. I came back and started rubbing his back.

"Its ok"

After he was finished he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

"I guess you didn't need this" I said before tossing the towel to the side.

"I'm sorry" he said.

"No its not your fault, I shouldn't have stuck my tongue in your mouth"

"Yeah that's true"

I frowned. "Gee thanks"

He smiled. "I'm just kidding"

"But I didn't know I tasted that bad"

He chuckled. "You don't taste bad"

"Really?"

"Yeah, you taste delicious"

I smiled and gave him another kiss. "I wish I could say the same about you"

He punched me in the arm.

"Ow, Logan I was just Kidding" I said while rubbing my arm.

He gave me a little peck on the lips. "I know"

I smiled and helped him up. "Are you feeling better?"

"Eh kinda, I just need to lay down"

I nodded and carried him to the couch. I sat down and he rested his head in my lap. I started playing with his hair. Even tough Logan was sick, he still looked adorable. I couldn't help but smile. He was finally mine, and no one was going to take him away from me.

**Logan's POV**

My life was starting to get better. I stopped cutting myself and thinking about suicide. I guess it was because I was with someone that treated me right. I actually felt loved and cared for in my new relationship. I still had some feelings for Kendall, but then I remembered he never cared about me anyway, only James did. What I did notice was that Kendall was starting to change. He was becoming his normal self again, but only just a little. Mrs. Knight made sure Kendall went to therapy at least twice a week. And it seemed to be paying off. The only person mad about it was Gustavo, he had to pay for Kendall's sessions. But no matter how much improvement Kendall made, I still wasn't going back. I was with James now and really happy.

The only thing that was wrong was that I was sick. Its been a few months and I still wasn't getting better. I just thought my immune system was down because I jacked up my body when I was depressed. James was starting to get worried, but I told him I was fine. He tried taking me to the hospital, but I didn't need to go, I wasn't that bad. Or so I thought. James and Carlos were down at the pool and Mrs. Knight, Kendall and Katie were at another therapy session. So I was all by myself. I decided to catch up on my reading. I was curled up on the couch reading quietly, when I feel a sharp pain hit my lower abdomen. I clutched my stomach and waited for it to pass. After a few minutes it was gone. I shrugged it off and continued reading. The pain returned a few minutes later, I sighed in frustration and went into the kitchen for a glass of water. As I reached for a glass the pain hit again and I had to grab the counter for support. Once the pain subsided I decided to go to the hospital. I grabbed the car keys and left. I didn't call James because I didn't want him to worry.

I reached the hospital and signed myself in. There wasn't that many people, so the wait was that long. My name was called back and I was led into a familiar room. This was the room where I first found out I was pregnant. I felt tears come to my eyes, but I quickly wiped them. I sat on the bed and waited for the doctor. The door opened and I smiled. It was Courtney.

"Hello Logan, how are you?"

"I'm fine I guess, just not feeling to good"

"Well don't worry I will find out what's bothering you"

She first felt my abdomen, then ran a few tests. A few hours later she returned with a huge smile on her face.

"Why are you smiling?" I asked.

"Logan I need to feel your stomach again, ok" she said.

I nodded and lifted up my shirt. She gently pressed down on different areas of my stomach.

"So how are you and Kendall doing?" she asked.

I sighed. "We ended it"

"I'm sorry"

"Its fine. Things were just not working between us"

"Well maybe now things will"

"Why?"

"Because your pregnant" she said.

"P-pregnant"

She smiled. "I would say about two months"

"But how I never had…."

I stopped when I realized something. I may have had sex with James, but then I remembered that Kendall also raped me. I felt my eyes fill up with tears and I let them fall.

"Honey are you ok?" Courtney asked.

I nodded but continued to cry. She then pulled me into a hug.

"Its ok, don't cry"

"I-I cant help it"

"Oh honey everything is ok, there is no need to cry"

"But their tears of joy" I said.

"I will give you a few minutes alone" she said before leaving the room.

I nodded and tried to wipe the tears away, but they kept flowing. I lied to Courtney. I didn't know if I was crying because I was happy, or because I didn't know who the father was. Kendall was right about me, I was a little slut. I'm pregnant and I don't even know who the father is. I put my head in my lap and started sobbing. This was all my fault. If I just fought back, maybe Kendall wouldn't have raped me. But then it could also be James baby. I was so confused and scared. I stopped crying when I heard my phone ringing. I pulled out my phone and checked the caller id. It was James. I hesitated to pick it up. It kept ringing until it said I had a missed call. My phone started ringing again and this time I picked it up.

"H-hello"

"Logan are you ok? Where are you?" James asked.

"I'm in the hospital"

"Why? Logan what happened? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm sorry I didn't call, but I didn't want you to worry" I said.

"But you almost gave me a heart attack. Are you ok at least?" he said.

"I-I'm fine, but I need to tell you something"

"Ok what is it?"

"Can I just tell you when I get home?" I asked.

"Yeah that's fine"

"Ok I'll talk to you later, bye"

"Bye babe, I love you" he said.

"I love you too"

The call ended and I put my phone away. Courtney and I talked for a few minutes, then I left the hospital. The whole way back I was crying. I was terrified about the whole thing. What if James didn't want the baby? I mean he did help me with my last pregnancy, but this time its different. It might be his baby. I prayed that not only will James want the baby, but that it was actually his. I reached the Palm Woods and walked through the lobby. When I got to apartment 2J, I took a deep breath before entering. I slowly turned the doorknob and walked in. I was immediately pulled into a hug.

"Logan are you ok? I was worried something bad happened to you" James said.

"I'm fine James, I swear" I said.

"Then why were you at the hospital?"

"Because I didn't feel good and…"

"But why didn't you tell me? Babe I could've taken you in or something"

"James its ok, I'm fine now" I said.

"Ok. Um didn't you want to tell me something?" he asked.

I nodded and led him into our shared room. I closed the door and turned to face him.

"Can you sit down for this?"

He nodded and sat on the edge of his bed.

I took a deep breath. "James please don't hate me when I tell you this"

"Logan I could never hate you, please don't ever think that I will" he said.

"But you will, I just know it"

He stood up and gave me hug. "Babe I could never hate you, please tell me what's wrong"

"I-I'm….pregnant"

He pulled away and held me by my shoulders. "W-what?"

"Its true James, I'm pregnant. Please don't hate me" I said.

"No I don't hate you, I'm actually glad"

"Y-you are?"

"Of course I am. Sure I'll have to give up a few things, but it will be worth it" he said.

"Your not mad?" I asked.

"No this is great news, this is going to be very exciting"

"Really?"

"Yeah just think of all the great things we get to do. I hope it's a boy so he could have my great looks. I could teach him all there is about looking good."

"Um James there's one more thing" I said

"What is it?"

"Well um…."

I couldn't tell him that there was a slight chance that Kendall might be the father. He just looked so happy about having a baby, and I didn't want to ruin that.

"Um…try not to teach the baby too much swagger." I said

He chuckled. "Don't worry, I will only teach him a little bit"

I smiled and gave James a kiss on the lips. "Thanks for being ok with this"

"Your welcome and don't worry I will be here for you every step of the way"

I smiled and gave him another hug. He held me tightly. I never wanted to leave his warm embrace. If Kendall was the father, I don't think I would tell him. Besides James would be a much better dad anyway. I just hope James really is the father.


	22. Chapter 22

**Logan's POV**

Later that evening James and I were sitting on the couch watching TV. I guess Carlos was still at the pool and Kendall, Mrs. Knight and Katie weren't back yet. I placed my hand over my stomach and sighed.

"You ok babe?" James asked.

"Yeah I guess" I said.

He frowned. "What's wrong?"

"I guess I'm afraid to tell everyone"

"Don't worry they will be happy for us"

"Not everyone"

"You mean Kendall"

I nodded my head. James sighed and wrapped his arm around me.

"Logan you need to forget about him, please"

"I have James, its just that…"

"Your afraid of what he's gonna think"

I nodded. "Yeah"

"Don't worry about what he thinks"

"I know but I don't want him to start treating you bad or something" I said

He chuckled. "He already has"

I groaned. "Why does he have to do that? Why cant he just accept the fact that I'm with you now"

"Because he still has feelings for you"

"Yeah but I don't feel the same way anymore"

"I know but don't worry he will forget about it"

I sighed. "I hope your right"

"When have I ever been wrong"

I laughed. "Don't get me started"

He chuckled and gave me a kiss on the lips. He was about to pull away, but I wanted more. I pulled him back and kissed him passionately. This time I took control. I stuck my tongue in his mouth, and he moaned from the kiss. We finally pulled apart, and panting heavily.

"Wow Logan"

I blushed. "Sorry"

"No its fine, just didn't think you would be the one to take control"

"Neither did I"

He chuckled. "Maybe you should do it more often"

"Maybe right now. No one is home anyway" I said.

He smirked and I could see the lust in his hazel eyes. I leaned in and gave him another kiss. He pushed me gently on the couch and attacked my lips.

"I thought I was in control" I said.

"Oh yeah, sorry"

I smiled and pushed him back. I climbed on top of him and started sucking and nibbling his neck. He moaned as I sucked his pulse point. I lowered my hands to his crotch and could feel him getting hard. I unbuttoned his jeans and lowered them to his knees. He started moaning louder as I placed my mouth over his cock. Even through his boxers I could still taste his pre-cum. I was about to remove his boxers, but stopped when the doorknob started jiggling. I quickly sat up and James picked his pants back up. Mrs. Knight, Kendall and Katie walked in and gave us a puzzled look.

"Hello boys" Mrs. Knight said.

"Hi" James and I said.

"How was your day?" she asked.

"Uh fine I guess. Yours?" I said

"It was good. Kendall is making major improvement. Right Kendall?" Mrs. Knight said.

"Yeah sure" he said before walking to his room.

She frowned and turned back to us. "So did anything interesting happen today?"

"Uh yeah Logan's…" James started.

"James I'm not ready to tell them" I whispered.

"But they deserve to know, besides its great news"

"Yeah but what if…"

I was interrupted when Carlos walked into the apartment.

"Hey guys" he said smiling.

"Well someone's happy" Mrs. Knight said.

"Yeah kinda, just had a good time at the pool"

"Meet a girl?" Mrs. Knight asked.

He blushed. "Yeah and she is really nice"

"That's great honey, are you going to ask her out?"

"I don't know yet, maybe" he said.

I noticed when he said the last words he looked at James. I couldn't help but feel slightly jealous. If Carlos was trying to make James jealous with a girl, well it wasn't going to work. James is mine. But I was glad that the subject was changed and Mrs. Knight forgot about what James was going to say.

"So Logan what did you want to tell me?" she asked.

Crap I guess she didn't forget.

"Um nothing" I said.

"Logan" she said.

"Its nothing I swear"

She rolled her eyes and turned to James. "James what's going on ?"

James looked at me and I shook my head.

"Uh well…uh….um" he said while looking at me and then back at Mrs. Knight.

"James you better tell me right now" she said with her hands on her hips.

"Logan needs to tell you something!" he blurted out and then quickly cupping his mouth.

I glared at him and he smiled apologetically.

"What did you want to tell me?" Mrs. Knight asked.

I sighed. "Its for everyone actually"

"Kendall get in here" Mrs. Knight yelled.

A few minutes later Kendall walked into the living room.

"What?" he asked.

"Logan needs to tell us something" Mrs. Knight said.

Kendall rolled his eyes and sat down on the loveseat.

"Ok Logan go ahead" Mrs. Knight said.

I took a deep breath and grabbed James hand. "I'm….I'm pregnant."

Mrs. Knight gasped and cupped her mouth, she looked like she was going to cry. I looked over at Kendall and I could tell he wasn't happy. He just glared at me and James, but mostly James. Even Carlos didn't seem to thrilled about it. He looked more pissed at me then at James.

"Again?" Katie asked.

"Katie!" Mrs. Knight said.

"What I was just asking"

"But it was rude"

"No its fine, but yeah I'm pregnant again" I said.

"Are you sure?" Mrs. Knight asked.

"Yeah I went to see a doctor today and she said I was"

"Who's the father?" Katie asked.

I turned whiter then usual and froze.

"I am of course" James said.

"I know I just wanted to see what Logan would do" Katie said.

"Katie go to your room" Mrs. Knight said.

"Fine" Katie groaned before going to her room.

"I'm so happy for you two" Mrs. Knight said as she gave us a hug.

"Thanks mama Knight" I said.

"Just please be very careful with this one, I don't want to find out you lost it" she said

"Don't worry we will take good care of the baby" James said as he patted my stomach.

I smiled and placed my hand over his.

"Can I got now?" Kendall asked.

Mrs. Knight frowned. "Aren't you happy for them?"

"I don't know maybe, maybe not" he said

Mrs. Knight sighed. "You can go then"

Kendall stood up from the couch and went back into his room, slamming the door hard.

"What do you think Carlos?" James asked.

"I-its great" he said.

He didn't seem too happy about it though. It almost seemed like he was going to cry. I felt bad. Maybe I shouldn't have told them.

"Are you ok man?" James asked.

Carlos nodded and quickly went into his room. I sighed and covered my face with my hands.

"You alright?" James asked.

"They hate me" I said.

"No they don't, their just…"

"Pissed"

"No their happy for us"

"It didn't seem like it"

"What do you mean?"

"Didn't you see all the dirty looks Kendall was giving you?" I asked.

James chuckled. "He is just jealous that your having my child and that he fucked up"

"James! Language" Mrs. Knight said from the kitchen.

"Sorry" James said.

"I shouldn't have told them" I said.

"Logan babe, its fine"

"What if its not?"

He chuckled. "You worry to much"

"Well you worry to less"

"That's probably why I'm not as stressed as you are"

I frowned. "Well what's wrong with worrying about something?"

"Nothing, but you do it all the time"

"Not helping"

He gave me a kiss on the lips. "Sorry babe"

"Honey James is right, you cant worry about this. You could get stressed out and stress isn't good for the baby" Mrs. Knight said.

I sighed. "Yeah your right, but I don't want them to hate me or James"

"Their not going to hate you, you guys are best friends" she said.

"Yeah but Kendall already hates me because I'm with James and Carlos I don't even know what's wrong with him" I said.

"Don't worry honey, everything will be fine" Mrs. Knight said.

I smiled. "Thanks mama Knight"

She smiled back and continued making dinner.

"Ok question, why do you listen to her but not me?" James asked.

I rolled my eyes. "I do listen to you"

"But I had said the same exact thing and I didn't get a thank you"

"James please don't be a baby, I don't need two"

He huffed and crossed his arms. I smiled and he glared at me.

"What?" he asked.

"You look so cute when your mad" I said.

His expression softened and he smiled.

I gave him a kiss on the lips. "I love you"

"I love you too"

"Maybe later we can continue from where we left off" I whispered in his ear as I ran my fingers up his shoulder.

He shivered from my touch and nodded his head slowly.

"Boys dinner" Mrs. Knight called.

James and I went into the kitchen and took a seat at the table. A few minutes later we were joined by Kendall, Carlos and Katie. Dinner was sort of awkward. Kendall and Carlos didn't talk or even look at James and I. Mrs. Knight tried talking to us about baby stuff, but that only resulted in Katie making jokes about it. After dinner was finished, I helped Mrs. Knight clean up. Once the kitchen was cleaned I went straight to my room. I closed the door and collapsed on my bed, face down. I gasped when I felt someone jump on me and I realized who it was.

"James what are you doing?" I asked.

"Nothing" he said.

"Well can you not sit on me"

"Why not, your so comfy"

"Please"

"But you said we can finish what we started" he said in my ear.

"Yeah but I meant when everyone was asleep" I said.

He started bouncing on me. "Please Logan, pretty please with a cherry on top"

"You really are a baby you know that"

He chuckled. "I know and I should get what I want"

I sighed into my pillow. "Fine just get off me"

He climbed off me and smacked my ass. I yelped and he stared laughing.

"Do you want it or not?"

He stopped laughing. "Yeah I want it"

I pulled him into a kiss and he lowered me on my back. He started sucking my neck and I moaned. I quickly pushed him off me.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"I'm in control tonight" I said.

He smirked and let me have my way with him.

**A/N: Hope everyone liked this chapter. sorry it was short but its getting late and i have other ideas for the next chapter. i dont know why but i liked this chapter for some odd reason. anywho hope everyone likes it. bye for now =D**


	23. Chapter 23

**Kendall's POV**

I was pissed. No I was beyond pissed. How could he do this to me? We barley broke up a few months ago and already he was knocked up. I wanted to seriously beat James. Maybe even kill him. But I knew I couldn't. I was making improvement and my mom was really proud of me. I didn't want to disappoint her. But I was still angry about Logan and James being together. James should've known that you don't go after your best friends ex, but I guess that means James really isn't my best friend. But even Logan said he loved me and that I meant everything to him. But if I meant so much to him, why did he leave me for James and then get pregnant.

I was so angry I felt like crying, but I knew I was stronger then that. I couldn't show Logan and James that I was hurting, it would probably only make them feel good or something. That night I couldn't sleep. So many thoughts were going through my mind. Not only was I kept awake from thinking about Logan and James, but I could also hear what they were doing. Logan's soft moans could be heard all the way across the apartment. I was surprised my mom didn't get up to silence them. I groaned and covered my head with my pillow. I didn't want to hear them, it would only make me feel worse. I wasn't the only one who was upset about all this. Carlos seemed just as pissed, but at Logan. I guess Carlos and I were going through the same thing. We both couldn't have what our hearts desired. I may have had Logan at one point, but Carlos never had James once. Even though we wanted them, we couldn't have them. And I guess we were just going to have to accept that. No matter how hard it is. If I couldn't have Logan as my boyfriend, I at least wanted him as a friend. It was better then nothing I guess.

The next morning I awoke feeling extremely exhausted. I didn't get much sleep thanks to certain people. I laid in bed for ten minutes, then realized we had rehearsal today. I groaned and got out of bed. I took a quick shower then went into a kitchen. I wasn't surprised to find Logan up already. He was always the first to get up and make breakfast. But what did surprise me was the way he was holding the counter. He held onto the counter top for dear life and was breathing heavily. I didn't want to talk to him, but seeing him like this made me worried.

"Logan are you ok?" I asked.

He turned around and I could see how pale he looked. I don't remember ever seeing him this sick.

"Yeah I'm fine" he said.

I frowned. "But you don't look to good"

"Kendall I'm fine"

I sighed. "Do you need any help?"

"No I got it" he said as he turned away from me and back to cooking.

I frowned. He needed my help, but since he was stubborn sometimes, he wouldn't take it. I walked over and stood behind him. Getting this close to him made me shiver. I just wanted to pull him into my arms and kiss him. I wanted things back to the way they were before. Where Logan and I were together and happy. But that was never going to happen, because Logan didn't have those feelings anymore. And he probably never will. I placed my hand on his shoulder and gently squeezed it.

"I hope you feel better"

He nodded. "Thanks"

I let go of him and went to wake Carlos up. I went into the bedroom and shook Carlos gently.

"Hey get up"

He groaned. "But its too early"

"Carlos come on"

"Fine"

I walked out of the room and back into the kitchen. I rolled my eyes at the scene in front of me. James was already up and was kissing Logan.

"Ahem" I said.

They stopped and looked up at me. Logan quickly fixed his shirt and James was trying to fix his hair.

"Sorry" Logan said.

I rolled my eyes and grabbed a plate of food. Carlos walked into the kitchen and sat next to me. Logan and James joined us a few minutes later. I tired to eat but I wasn't really that hungry. After getting that close to Logan, all my feelings for him came back. I needed to have him back. He was mine. I couldn't live without him. I needed to get him back somehow.

"Kendall"

I looked up from my plate. "Huh? What?"

"What time do we have to be at the studio?" James asked.

"In about an hour" I said.

He nodded and turned to Logan. "Are you ok babe?"

"I'm fine James" Logan said.

"Maybe you should stay here and get some rest" James said.

Logan shook his head. "I cant, Gustavo will kill me"

"Babe your pregnant, you shouldn't be working so hard" James said.

"I'm only two months, I can still do some things" Logan said.

James sighed. "Please babe, I will tell Gustavo your really sick and everything will be ok"

"Fine I'll stay" Logan said.

James kissed him on the head then stood up to finish getting ready.

"I guess I will get ready then" Carlos said as he too stood up.

After Carlos and James left, it was just me and Logan. We didn't say anything, just sat there quietly. The silence was becoming too much, and I could tell he wasn't enjoying it either. He would fidget in his seat or look anywhere in the apartment but at me.

"Logan please say something, anything" I said.

He quickly looked down at his plate and played with his food with his fork.

"Please Logan talk to me, I hate that we don't talk anymore. I miss it"

He sighed and looked up at me. "I miss talking to you too"

"Then why cant we be friends?"

"I want to be your friend, but I'm afraid"

"Afraid of what?"

"That I'll get feelings for you again"

I sighed. "Logan you wont and I would….rather you be with James anyway"

"W-what?"

"I don't deserve you Logan and I want you to be happy. But all I'm asking in return is if we can still be friends."

He nodded. "I can do that. Kendall I don't want to lose you as a friend"

I stood up and gave him a hug. "I don't want to lose our friendship either"

"Do you think James will get mad?"

"I don't think so, besides I bet he wants everything back to normal too"

"Thank you Kendall for still wanting to be my friend, even after everything I've done to you"

"No Logan you didn't do anything, it was all my fault. Don't ever think it's your fault we broke up"

"I'm sorry" he said,

"No Logie I'm sorry"

He looked up at me and smiled. "I used to love it when you would call me that"

"I loved the way your face would light up from hearing it, like it did just now" I said.

He smiled and gave me another hug. "I hope we can be friends forever"

"We will Logie, we will"

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***

**Logan's POV**

_{Five months into pregnancy}_

Today was my first ultrasound, and I was really excited. James seemed happy about it too. The only thing I wasn't happy about was that I gained a lot of weight. My stomach was about the size of a basketball or pretty close anyway. And I hated it. Being pregnant makes you feel really self conscious.

"Logan come on babe" James called from the living room.

"Coming" I said as I quickly pulled my shirt down and left the bathroom.

He frowned when I entered the living room.

"What?" I asked.

"You were looking at yourself in the mirror again weren't you" he said.

"No"

He raised an eyebrow. "Logan I know when your lying"

I sighed. "Ok fine I was, but I cant help it. I just hate the way I look"

He sighed and pulled me into a hug. "Babe you are beautiful"

"You really think so?" I asked into his shoulder.

"I don't think, I know"

"Thanks James"

He pulled away and kissed me on the lips. "Now come on, we don't want to be late"

We reached the hospital and I couldn't help but feel nervous. Everyone was giving me weird and confused looks. Some people even looked disgusted. We sat down in the waiting room, and my stomach started doing flips. I guess it was because I was nervous, but the dirty looks weren't helping.

"James I want to go home" I whispered.

"But we just got here" he said.

"I know but I don't feel good and everyone is making me uncomfortable"

He looked up just as a women gave me a disgusted look.

"Babe don't worry about it, their just don't understand"

I looked down. "Yeah but I feel even more like a freak"

He lifted up my chin and gazed into my eyes. "Your not a freak, your perfect in everyway"

"Really?"

"Yes and I love you so much"

I smiled. "I love you too"

"Mr. Mitchell?"

We both turned our attention to the nurse who called me and followed her. We went into the same room I was in last time. I gently climbed up on the bed and waited for Courtney.

"Remember last time we were in here?" James asked.

"Yeah I remember"

"You were so scared that Kendall was gonna hate you because you were pregnant"

"Yup, but he didn't"

James sighed in annoyance. "Yeah"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that" I said.

"Logan its ok"

We were both silent for a moment and I didn't like it.

"So what do you think we're having?" I asked.

"Hmm I don't know, but like I said I want it to be a boy" James said.

"I don't really care what we're having"

"But don't you want to teach our baby how to play hockey?" he asked.

"Yeah I guess, but a girl can also play too you know"

"I guess but I still want a boy"

I chuckled. "Maybe we will find out"

He smiled. "I hope so"

The door to the room opened and Courtney walked in.

"Hello guys, how are you?"

"Good, and you?" I said

"I'm doing pretty good, thanks for asking. I see you brought James this time" she said.

"Yeah he needs to be here" I said.

"Yeah I'm the father" James said.

"Oh so you're the daddy" Courtney said.

"Yeah why wouldn't I be, I mean Logan and I have been going out for a while now" James said.

"Oh well I just thought Ke…."

She glanced at me and saw my worried expression. "Um anyway lets take a look shall we"

I nodded and was glad she didn't bring up Kendall. She turned on the machine and squeezed the cool gel onto my baby bump. I flinched and James grabbed my hand. I held onto it tightly and waited for Courtney to show us our baby. She gently pressed the transducer to my stomach and the screen lit up.

"There is your baby" she said pointing at the screen.

It was beautiful. You could clearly make out its little hands and feet. I felt tears come to my eyes and I looked at James. His hazel eyes were filled with tears too.

"Now I can determine the sex of the baby, would you like to know" Courtney said.

I looked at James. "Do you?"

He nodded. "Yeah I do"

"Ok well it looks like your having a…. girl" Courtney said.

"A girl" I squeaked.

"Mm hmm" Courtney said.

"I'm sorry James" I said.

"Its ok, but I will still teach her how to look good" he said

I chuckled and gave him a kiss on the lips. "Just don't teach her how to get boys"

"Hey I'm not a bad parent"

"I know babe" I said.

He smiled and gave me another kiss.

"Ok well that's all for today, but you can come back in about a few weeks" Courtney said as she wiped the gel off my stomach and switched the machine off.

"Thank you" I said sitting up slowly.

"Oh do you guys want a picture of the baby?" she asked.

"Yes please" I said.

On the way back to the Palm Woods I couldn't stop looking at the picture Courtney gave us. It was a little weird knowing that there was a little person living inside me. As much as it was exciting, it was also very scary. It was up to me make sure this baby was safe. It was a big responsibility.

"Are you ever going to set it down?" James asked.

I looked up at him. "What?"

He chuckled. "Your not even paying attention"

"Sorry"

"No its fine"

I nodded and continued looking at the photo. Even if I couldn't see much of her, she still looked adorable.

"I wonder if she will have my eyes" James said.

My smile faded. I hope she did come out with hazel eyes, and not green. I really needed to tell James that Kendall might be the father, but every time I tried, I couldn't. I didn't want to hurt James and I was scared he would leave me if Kendall was really the father. I don't think I could handle being alone and also a single parent.

"Logan are you ok?" he asked.

"Huh? Oh yeah I'm fine"

"Ok, we're almost there"

I nodded and gripped the picture in my hand tighter. We reached the Palm Woods and I had to cover up my stomach with my jacket, so no one could see. Of course I did get some weird looks because it was eighty five degrees and I had a jacket, but that didn't bother me as much. As soon as we walked into apartment 2J, I was asked a million questions by Mrs. Knight.

"How did it go? How's the baby? Is it a boy or girl? What's in your hand?"

I chuckled and handed her the picture. She squealed in delight.

"Is it a boy or girl?" she asked.

"It's a girl" I said with one hand over my stomach.

"Oh Logan she's beautiful"

I smiled. "Thanks"

"Its because she has my looks" James said proudly.

"Who has your looks?" Kendall asked as he entered the living room.

"Their baby" Mrs. Knight said as she handed Kendall the picture.

His face immediately fell and I felt bad for him. I know how much he wanted the last baby, and now that it was happening again, I could tell he wanted it to be his baby instead of James. If James really was the father that is.

"That's great" he said as he handed me the photo.

"Yeah it is" I said,

He gave me his fake smile and I could see the hurt in his eyes.

"Um I was gonna go down to the pool with Carlos, do you guys wanna come?" Kendall asked.

"Hell yeah! I mean if its ok with Logan" James said.

I chuckled. "You don't have to ask. Sorry Kendall I'm gonna have to pass, I'm really tired and I don't want to be wearing this jacket all day."

"Ok then I guess I'll see you later" he said before leaving with James.

I sighed and went into my room. I closed the door and sat on my bed. I felt so bad for Kendall and James. One of them was the father and I didn't know who it was. I started crying when I realized they are going to hate me forever. My crying soon turned into sobbing. The door to my room opened and Mrs. Knight walked in.

"Are you alright honey?"

"I-I'm fine" I said while trying to wipe my eyes.

"What's bothering you?" she asked as she sat next to me.

"Well I….I don't know….who the father is"

Her eyes widened. "I thought James was"

"So did I, but then I remembered Kendall ra….had sex with me as well" I said.

"Did you tell them that you don't know?"

I shook my head. "I'm scared to. They might hate me and I don't want James to leave me"

She pulled me into a hug. "I'm sure they will understand, but you need to tell them"

I nodded. "Can I wait till tomorrow?"

"Honey the longer you wait, the harder it will be"

I sighed. "I promise I will do it tomorrow, but right now I'm tired"

She nodded. "Ok get some rest"

I laid down and got comfy. She gave me a kiss on the forehead before leaving the room. My eyes closed and I fell into a deep sleep.

**Carlos's POV**

I was getting ready to go to the pool with Kendall, but was surprised he wasn't in the kitchen like he was a few minutes ago.

"Hey Kendall where are you?" I asked.

"_I bet Logan or James knows" _I thought.

I made my way to Logan and James room. But before I could knock, I heard him talking to Mrs. Knight. I wasn't going to listen in on their conversation, but my curiosity got the best of me. I gently placed my ear to the door and listened. I could barley hear what they were saying, but I did catch bits and pieces.

"Well I….I don't know….who the father is" I heard Logan say.

"I thought James was" Mrs. Knight said.

"So did I, but then I remembered that Kendall had sex with me as well" Logan said.

My eyes widened in shock. Logan didn't know who the father of his baby was. It could be either James or Kendall"s. I kinda wanted it to be Kendall's so James would leave Logan. But that wouldn't be fair to Logan, because he would be alone with the baby. I did love James at one point, but since he was with Logan I gave up on James. I would rather have my friends happiness come first before mine. But if Kendall was the father, James would be devastated. He loved that baby more then anything, and I didn't want him to get hurt. I needed to tell James if Logan didn't.

**A/N: yeah i know this chapter sucks and im really sorry. anyway i hope everyone still liked it and i will try and update tomorrow =D**


	24. Chapter 24

**James POV**

Kendall and I went down to the pool, but Carlos wasn't with us. We took our seats in the lounge chairs and waited for Carlos to show up.

"I thought Carlos was coming?" I asked.

"He is, but he's probably looking for his helmet or something" Kendall said.

I shrugged and continued to relax. It was nice to just sit back and enjoy myself. The past few months have been hard with Logan's pregnancy and work. Gustavo hasn't been giving us much of a break, ever since Logan could no longer participate. Even though it was hard now, I knew it was only going to get harder.

"So how did the appointment go?" Kendall asked.

"It was good, we got to see the baby for the first time" I said.

"Is it a boy or girl?"

"It's a girl, but I'm still happy"

"I'm glad your happy about this"

I smiled. "Thanks man"

He smiled back, but I knew it was fake. I guess I understood why he was upset about all of this. But he was the one who screwed up and lost everything. Even if he was getting better, he wasn't going to change Logan's mind. Logan was with me now and happy.

"Hey James" he said.

"Yeah"

"Um what if….by chance…um the baby is mine"

I turned to face him. "What?"

"I'm just saying what if it was"

"Why the fuck would you think that. The baby is mine Kendall." I snapped.

"Hey chill, it was just a question" he said.

"Well I don't care. You asked a very stupid question" I said as I stood up form the chair.

He quickly stood up. "James why are you making a big deal about it?"

"Me! You're the one saying its your kid. You don't know what your talking about."

"But James what if it was my kid?"

"Kendall just shut up. Your just jealous because I have everything you want. I guess you shouldn't have fucked up huh?" I said.

He glared at me and clutched his hands into fists. "Your such an asshole"

I laughed. "Me? Oh yeah I'm the asshole"

"You know what James I'm done with you" he said.

"Good, I don't want you in my life anyway"

"Fine" he said before walking away.

"And your not allowed near Logan!" I yelled.

He quickly turned around. "Yes I am. We are still friends"

"Not for long"

He turned back and left the pool. I didn't care if he was mad at me or even hated my guts. I hated him so much right now. How dare he say that he could be the father of my baby. Logan would've told me if he was, right? I sighed and sat back down in the chair. I hope Kendall is lying and that the baby was mine. The baby wasn't even here yet, but I still loved her so much.

"James are you ok?"

I looked up to see Carlos standing next to me with a worried look on his face.

"Oh hey" I said.

He sat down in the chair next to me. "Are you alright?"

"No Kendall and I had a fight. We're no longer friends"

"What was the fight about?" he asked.

"About Logan and the baby. He asked if there was a chance he was the father and not me" I said.

Carlos sighed. "James there's something I need to tell you"

"What is it?"

"Logan doesn't know who the father is"

"W-what?"

"I heard him talking with Mrs. Knight and he doesn't know"

"So I might not be the father?" I asked.

"I'm so sorry" he said.

"Your lying"

"What, no I swear that's what I heard"

"No your trying to ruin my relationship because your jealous. Your exactly like Kendall" I said standing up.

He stood up as well. "I'm not trying to ruin your relationship. I don't like you like that anymore. James I'm trying to help you"

"No your not Carlos. Just shut the fuck up and leave me alone" I said before walking away.

I was going to confront Logan about this. I needed to know the truth and I needed to know it now.

**Kendall's POV**

I hated James. I hated him so much. I just asked a simple question and he goes and chews my head off. Maybe he was the one who was jealous for the first time in his life. That baby could be mine and he probably wasn't happy about it. I admit I was a little jealous of James. He did have everything I wanted, but if the baby was mine I might have another chance with Logan. I knew I needed to ask Logan about it. Only he would know.

I went back to apartment 2J, and was a little shocked to find it empty. My mom and Katie must've left, but I doubt it Logan did. I went to his and James room and found him asleep. I didn't want to wake him, but this was very important.

"Logan, Logan wake up" I said as I shook him gently.

His eyes fluttered open. "Huh?"

"I need to ask you something."

"Now, cant this wait"

"No its important"

He sat up and rubbed his eyes. "Go ahead"

I took a deep breath. "Logan I need you to be honest with me ok"

He nodded and I continued.

"Is James really the father?"

His eyes widened but he didn't answer me, just looked down.

"Logan answer me, is he or not?"

"I-I don't know"

"What do you mean you don't know, you have to" I said.

But I honestly don't know. I thought it was James, but then I remembered the night you ra….raped me" he said.

"So it might be mine?"

He nodded and I could see the tears roll down his face. There was a chance the baby was mine and I was happy about it. But then again I wasn't. Logan wouldn't go back with me even if it was for our baby. He loved James so much. And that really hurt.

I sighed. "Is there a way we could find out for sure?"

"I-I think so"

"Ok how?"

"I could have a DNA test done"

"Ok"

"I just hope James doesn't get mad" he said.

"He already is"

"What? Why?"

"Because I asked him what if it was my baby" I said.

"Kendall why did you do that. Now he might think its true"

"Well it might"

"Yeah but I was going to tell you guys"

"Then why did you keep it a secret for five months?" I asked.

"I'm sorry, but I was scared you guys would hate me"

"Logan I could never hate you, I just hate that you kept something this big from me"

"I'm sorry"

I pulled him into a hug and rubbed his back soothingly. "Its ok Logie, we can figure this out"

"W-where's James?" he asked.

"He's at the pool still"

He sighed. "I guess I should tell him"

"Do you want me to be there when you tell him?"

He nodded. "Please, it concerns both of you anyway"

I nodded and we both went into the living room. Logan sat down on the couch and sighed. He seemed nervous and scared, and I didn't blame him. I was afraid of how James was going to react. If he yelled at me for asking about the baby, I was scared on how he was going to be when he finds out the truth. I sat next to Logan and wrapped my arm around him.

"Everything is going to be ok"

"But what if its not and then he leaves me" he said.

"He wont Logie, I promise"

"I hope your right"

The front door opened and James walked in looking pissed. Logan gulped and I held him tighter.

"Get away from him!" James yelled.

I quickly let go of Logan and stood up from the couch. "James relax, Logan needs to tell you something"

He turned to face Logan. "Tell me what?"

Logan sighed. "J-James you might not be the father"

"What are you talking about? You only had sex with me right?" James said.

Logan shook his head. "I also did it with Kendall"

"How could you Logan? I thought you loved me" James said.

"I do but…"

"I raped him" I said cutting Logan off.

James turned his attention to me. "You did what"

"After I found out about you guys, I raped him that night when we stayed late at the studio. I'm sorry" I said.

"I cant believe you would do that!" James yelled.

"James calm down" Logan said.

"And you, you didn't even tell me about this" James said as he turned to Logan.

"James I'm sorry" Logan said.

"I cant even talk to you right now." James before heading towards the door.

"No James I need you, I'm sorry" Logan said as he stood up from the couch.

James didn't say anything, just stood by the door with his hand around the doorknob. He almost looked like he was going to cry.

"Please James don't leave me, I cant do this on my own" Logan said with tears in his eyes.

James sighed and turned back to face Logan. "I'm not going to leave you. But I need to know which one of us is the father."

"I promise I will get a paternity test done" Logan said.

"Ok and don't worry I'm not going anywhere. I promised I would be here for you" James said.

Logan walked up to James and gave him a hug. I felt jealous and angry, I kinda wanted them to break up, so I could have Logan back. But I guess that wasn't going to happen. I just needed to get over Logan for good.

"I'll go call Courtney" Logan said before he went back in the bedroom.

After Logan left the living room, I felt like leaving too. I didn't like being in the same room with James now, it just felt weird and I didn't like it. James would glance at me and glare. He still hated me and I hated him. But we were going to have to put up with each other for Logan. No matter how hard it was going to be.

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR

**Logan's POV**

I sat on the bed in the hospital room while Kendall and James sat as far away from each other as possible. I was right they did hate me. I was so scared about getting this test done because not only will I find out who the baby's dad is, but Courtney also mentioned that its dangerous for the baby. The room was quiet and I felt awkward. I would glance at James, but he had his head buried in his lap. Kendall wasn't even paying attention, he was lost in space. The door to the room opened and Courtney walked in. Both Kendall and James looked up. She smiled, but it wasn't her usual happy smile. And that made me nervous.

"Hello" she said.

I gave her a small smile. "Hi"

"So you're here for a paternity test, is that correct?" she asked.

I nodded. "Yeah I need to know which one is the father"

"Ok Logan but you do know how dangerous this is for the baby, right?"

"Yeah but I need to do it"

"Ok can I please have you lay back and lift up your shirt" she said

I laid back on the bed and lifted up my shirt. She turned the ultrasound machine on and wiped my stomach with an antiseptic wipe. My eyes widened as she pulled out a big needle.

"What's that for?" James asked.

"This is will be inserted into Logan's abdomen and I can get a sample of the amniotic fluid" Courtney said.

"Will It hurt?" I asked.

"You may feel a little pain" she said.

I gulped and James grabbed my hand.

"Ok Logan you ready?" she asked.

I nodded and took a deep breath.

"Maybe you should close your eyes" James said.

"No its ok" I said

I took another deep breath as I saw the needle get closer to my stomach. Courtney gently inserted the needle, and I shut my eyes. The pain was awful. I had to bite my tongue to keep me from screaming. I was glad James was there to hold my hand. If this was painful I didn't want to know what labor pains was going to feel like. I squeezed James hand harder and Courtney pushed the needle in a little deeper. I opened my eyes and looked at the ultrasound machine screen. I could see my baby, but the needle was also visible. It was only a few inches away from the baby, and that scared me. I was to busy worrying about my baby that I forgot about the pain. In a matter of minutes the procedure was over.

"All done and you did very well Logan" Courtney said as she placed a bandage over the spot where the needle was.

"That's it right?" I asked.

"Well I need to get some samples from James and Kendall, then take it to the lab and you will be all set"

"Wait are you going to do that to us too?" James asked.

Courtney chuckled. "No I'm just going to swab the inside of your mouth"

James sighed in relief and Kendall nodded.

"Ok who's first" she said.

We have been at the hospital for about four hours, and I could tell Kendall and James wanted to go home. The testing was taken forever and Courtney hasn't came back once to check up on us. There was still some slight pain in my stomach from the needle, so I had to lay down the whole time. James was pacing the room and Kendall was still in his same spot. I kept feeling this slight fluttering in my stomach and I didn't know what it was. That is until I felt a little bit of pressure. I gasped and placed my hand over my stomach. James stopped pacing and ran to my side.

"Logan babe what's wrong?"

"I think the baby just kicked" I said.

"Really?"

"Here feel" I said grabbing his hand and placing it on my stomach.

"I don't feel anything"

I moved his hand a little to the right, and we both felt it.

"Wow" James whispered.

I smiled. "Its amazing"

He gave me a kiss on the lips. Then let go and placed his forehead against mine.

"Logan do you think the baby is mine?" he asked.

"I think so"

"Really?"

"Yeah don't worry I promise this baby is yours"

He smiled and gave me another kiss. We pulled apart when the door opened and Courtney walked in.

"Mr. Mitchell I have your test results" she said.

I sat up slowly and grabbed James hand. He gently squeezed it and we waited for the results. I was praying and hoping that the baby was James, it had to be.

She opened a yellow envelope and pulled out a piece of paper. "According to the results it turns out that… Kendall is the father"

I felt my heart sank. Kendall couldn't be the father, James was supposed to be. He was the one I was in love with.

"There has to be a mistake" I said.

"No there isn't, Kendall is the father"

James let go of my hand and ran his hand through his hair. I could tell he was upset and that he was trying to hide it. Kendall looked a little shocked, but when he caught me looking at him, he quickly looked down.

"I will leave you alone for a moment" Courtney said before leaving the room.

"James I'm so sorry" I said.

"Don't talk to me" he said before leaving the room.

"James wait" I called.

But the door already closed and he was gone. I started crying. This wasn't supposed to happen. James was supposed to be the father not Kendall. I covered my face with my hands and started sobbing.

"I'm sorry Logie" Kendall said as he put his arm around me.

"He should be the father not you" I said.

"I know, but I will be here for you and the baby. Its my responsibility too" he said.

"No I don't need you, I need James"

"Logie I can help you"

"No you cant"

"Yes I can"

"Fine if you want to help me then get out" I said.

"What?"

"Just leave me alone, I don't need you for anything"

"Logie please I can help y…."

"Get out!" I screamed.

"But…"

"I don't want you and I don't need you, I can do this on my own" I said.

"You do need me, Logan you cant do this on your own" he said.

"Yes I can, now get out"

He sighed and left the room. I was lying I did need him. He was the father of my baby. But I was in love with James and I needed him right now more then ever. I didn't know what to do. Do I go back with Kendall for our baby, or go with James and try to make it work. But what if James didn't want me anymore, then what. I started sobbing harder when I realized James probably doesn't love or even want me anymore. After this how could he. I screwed up and now I was pregnant with Kendall's baby instead of James, the guy I really loved. I needed to talk to him, maybe just maybe he would take me back. I needed him.

"Please James don't leave me"

**A/N:I feel bad for James =( he was all happy and now hes upset. but dont blame me blame Kendall. anyway hoped everyone enjoyed this chapter, even if it was a little messed up.**


	25. Chapter 25

**James's POV**

I stormed out of the room we were in. Even though Logan called after me I ignored him, I didn't want to hear it. He lied to me. He said the baby was mine, he promised. But I wasn't the father. Kendall was, and that made me angry. I walked out of the hospital and sat on the curb in the parking lot. I was furious with both Logan and Kendall. I loved that baby so much, and to have her taken way from me really hurt. I covered my face with my hands and started crying. People were staring at me, but I was hurting too much to care. I stopped crying when I felt someone place their hand on my shoulder.

"I'm so sorry James"

I looked up to see Kendall standing beside me. I shrugged him off and turned away.

"Look I know you hate me right now, but I'm sorry" he said.

"Your not sorry. This was your plan all along. You hated that Logan was with me, so you tried to ruin our relationship. I guess your happy now that you've won" I said.

He sighed and sat down next to me. "I never meant for this to happen"

"Your so full of shit Kendall. Why don't you do us all a favor and just leave."

"No I'm not leaving, especially now since Logan needs me"

"He doesn't need you, I bet he doesn't even want you"

"James I'm going to be here for him because I know you wont"

I shoved him and he fell back. I stood up and started walking away.

"See even you know its true. Your just going to walk away from everything, because that's what you do best" he said.

I stopped and tried my best not to hit him, even though he deserved it. I was so angry I could feel my blood starting to boil. But I couldn't show Kendall that his words affected me, I couldn't give him that satisfaction. I wasn't going to. I took a deep breath and went back into the hospital. I may have walked away from Kendall, but I wasn't going to walk away from Logan. I still loved him and I knew he loved me. And even if the baby wasn't mine, I was still going to treat her like she was my daughter.

I walked back up to the room Logan was in. I was about to knock on the door, but stopped when I heard him sobbing. This was all my fault, I shouldn't have walked out like I did. Now he probably thinks I hate him. But I don't, I love him so much. I just wasn't happy that he didn't tell me how Kendall raped him and how i wasnt the baby's dad. I sighed and walked away. He needed some time alone. I went back outside, but Kendall wasn't there. I sat back down on the curb and buried my face in my lap. I felt guilty for not only treating Logan bad, but also Carlos. Carlos tried to tell me about this, but I wouldn't listen. He wasn't trying to ruin my relationship, but was trying to help it. If that makes any sense. He was just trying to warn me before I found out the hard way. And that would've been worse. I needed to apologize to Logan and Carlos. I just hope they forgive me.

**Kendall's POV**

I decided to take a little walk around the hospital. I didn't want to bother Logan, he was already mad at me. While taking my walk, I couldn't help but smile. The baby was mine. I did feel a little bad for James because I knew he still loved Logan, but I loved and needed Logan more then James did. But now since I found out I was the father, I was going to get my shit together. I wasn't going to hurt Logan anymore. Even though I've said that so many times, I mean it this time. I was going to prove to Logan that I have changed and will be there for him and the baby. I just hope Logan does take me back, I need him and he needs me. He may have said that he doesn't need or want me, but he really does.

After a while of wandering around, I went back up to Logan's room. I opened the door and found him laying on the bed with his eyes closed. I sighed and walked over to his side.

"Logie are you ok?"

He opened his eyes and sat up. I could see that his eyes were red from crying.

"What do you want?" he asked.

"Please Logie I'm really sorry"

"Kendall I don't want to hear it"

"No I am really sor…."

"Look I just want to go home" he said cutting me off.

I nodded and we both left the room. He made sure to keep his distance from me all the way until we went outside. Then he finally said something to me.

"Where's James?" he asked.

"He was here before" I said.

He continued scanning the area for James. He finally found him sitting down on the curb. He sighed and walked towards him. I didn't follow because I hate James right now, and I didn't want to see them make up. Logan sat down next to him and they were talking. James would look at me a few times then back at Logan. After a few minutes of them talking, they stood up and came up to me.

"I need to talk to both of you when we get home" Logan said.

I gave him a puzzled look but nodded. James drove us back to the Palm Woods, but the ride was really uncomfortable. I sat in the back and glared at James the entire time. Logan was probably going to tell us that he was staying with James, and I would be kicked to the curb. I couldn't have that. I loved Logan so much it hurt and I sure as hell wasn't going to give up on getting him back. The baby was my only chance of winning him back from James. I just need to show Logan that I'm the only one for him and he's the only one for me. But he still seemed like he hates me. I never meant for any of this to happen. I was never supposed to have beaten Logan, but love and respect him. He deserved so much more, and I couldn't give it to him. But now since I was getting my life back on track, I can give him love, and our relationship would be back to the way it was before. He just needed to forgive me first.

We reached the Palm Woods and made our way through the lobby. It almost seemed that everyone was staring at us. But when I would look their way, they would quickly look down or pretend to be doing something. James opened the door to apartment 2J and we walked inside. We were immediately greeted by Carlos.

"Hey how was the appointment?" he asked.

James didn't say anything, just walked off to his room. Logan gave Carlos a sad look then followed James.

"Did it not go so well?" he asked.

I sighed and sat down on the couch. Carlos took the seat next to me.

"What happened?"

"It turns out that I'm the father of Logan's baby" I said.

"Oh, is that a bad thing?"

"No I don't think so. I mean I am glad about it, but then I'm not"

"What are you going to do?"

I sighed. "Try to be there for Logan, he really needs me"

"But what about James?" he asked.

"I don't know Carlos. I just hope Logan chooses me over him"

"Yeah me too"

I looked up at him. "You want me to get back with Logan"

"Yeah, you guys are meant for each other. I guess I understand why he went out with James, just so he could feel loved. But Kendall I've seen how much improvement that you've made, and I know Logan has seen it too. I think you guys have another chance" he said.

I smiled. "Your right Carlos. Logan and I are meant for each other and I'm going to prove it to him"

"Well then here's your chance"

I looked up to see Logan and James walk into the living room. James gave me a dirty look while Logan didn't even look in my direction. He still seemed upset, but that wasn't going to stop me from telling him I wanted him back, and that I would do anything to do so.

"Um Carlos, I need to talk to them alone" Logan said.

Carlos nodded and left the apartment. James took a seat on the other side of the couch. Once Carlos was gone, Logan turned to face us.

"Ok I know now that I have to choose between you guys" Logan said.

"Wait your not going to pick me?" James asked.

"I cant James, there is also Kendall"

"But why? He doesn't deserve any more chances" James said.

"You know what James its not up to you which one of us Logan picks. So just shut up and let him choose" I said.

"Hey don't tell me to shut up. Your just upset because he wont pick you ever" James said.

I could feel myself getting angry and wanting to hurt James. But if I did that, I wouldn't be showing Logan how much I've changed. I ignored James and waited for Logan to tell us.

"Look I'm not choosing Kendall" Logan said.

"See I told you" James said.

"I'm not picking you either"

"What?"

"I cant go out with either one of you" Logan said.

"No you have to. Please Logan don't leave me. I love you" James said.

Logan shook his head. "You both are causing me so much stress and I cant take it"

"Logan I promise I wont cause you anymore stress. Please pick me because I need you" I said.

"No don't listen to him. I need and love you Logan. I can treat you better then him anyway" James said.

"Hey I've changed ok. So stop bringing up the past. And I can show Logan that I'm the one for him" I said.

"Please you couldn't even show him love when you were with him, I doubt it you can show it now" James said.

"You know what shut up"

"Why don't you? Its obvious Logan isn't interested in what you have to say"

"God James why do you have to be so fucking stupid!" I yelled.

"I'm not the stupid one, you are. You're the one who has made so many fucking mistakes and doesn't even care. I doubt it you really changed, its all another lie"

"I've learned from my mistakes ok, I know what I did was wrong and I'm going to stop" I said.

"Yeah right, your not capable of doing that. I mean you weren't even capable of keeping your boyfriend." James said.

I stood up quickly. "Just shut the fuck up!"

James stood up as well and got in my face. "Why don't you shut up and leave. Logan doesn't want you around and neither do I"

"You don't know that, he could want me back. I don't know why he went with you, your just as bad as me" I said.

"Really, you think I'm worse then you. Well your wrong. Logan went with me because you treated him like shit, I was the one who treated him right" James said.

"Well if your so good to him, then why did you walk out on him today?" I said.

James didn't say anything. But I knew my words affected him. He seemed angry. Probably because what I said was true.

"I guess you really do walk away when you cant handle things" I said.

"Kendall just shut up" he said.

"Why because you know its true?"

"Just shut the fuck up!" he said as he shoved me.

"Make me" I said shoving him back.

"I really hate you Kendall"

"I don't care I hate you too"

"I don't even know why we were friends in the first place" he said.

"It was a mistake if you ask me" I said.

"G-guys…" Logan started.

But we ignored him and continued arguing.

"God Kendall why cant you just leave. Then maybe everything will be better without you"

"Please stop…." Logan said.

"Because I cant leave Logan. He needs me and I need him" I said.

"He doesn't need you. He needs someone that will always be there for him" James said.

"I will be there for him"

"Your only going to stay because you screwed up and you have no choice but to stay with him for the baby"

"That's not true. I love him and that baby more then you would ever know" I said.

"No you don't. You just don't want to look bad, so your going to stay" James said.

"You really are fucking stupid"

"No that would be you. Your just afraid to admit it so you blame other people"

"Your asking for it James" I said

He got in my face. "Then do it. I'm not afraid"

I clutched my hands into fists, but didn't raise them.

"See you cant do it because you're a coward."

I raised my fist and it almost connected to his face. But I stopped when I heard Logan scream.

"Stop!"

We both turned to face Logan. He was trembling and he looked upset.

"This is exactly what I'm talking about. You guys do this all the time and I'm fucking sick of it! I don't want to be with either one of you, I cant handle the stress" Logan said.

"No please Logie, I wont cause you any more pain" I said.

"I cant deal with you guys right now" he said before going to his bedroom.

"Wait Logan" I said.

He turned around to face us. "What?"

"Is it me or James?"

"Let me think about it. I'll get back to you in a week or a month. I need time to think things over" he said

And with that he walked into his room and slammed the door. I winced and then turned to face James. His face was a mixture of different emotions. He looked sad, confused and angry. I guess you could say we both screwed up. But now at least James and I were even. We both lost the thing we loved and cared about and would do anything to win him back. I just hope Logan picks me over James. I can show Logan how much I've changed and that I love him deeply. But this wasn't going to be easy. James was probably going to show Logan that he is better for him then me. Well all I can say is may the best man win.

**A/N:Sorry this chapter was short, but i will try and make the next one longer. so enjoy this one for now =D**


	26. Chapter 26

**Logan's POV**

I couldn't believe that they were arguing again, even after I just told them how much stress they cause me. I was so fed up with it that I went to my room. I was sick and tired of them fighting over me. Maybe some people like the idea of two people fighting for your love, but not me. It was really annoying and frustrating. I wasn't some prize to be won. I told James and Kendall that I would make a decision and get back to them in about a week or even a month. Hopefully during this time I would be able to think things through and not be as stressed out. But why didn't they understand that they cant be doing this to me. Cant they see that I'm stressed already, I didn't need anymore added on. I just wish I knew who I was going to choose. Was it going to be James, the guy who has been here for me the entire time and has expressed his love for me in so many ways. Or was it going to be Kendall, the father of my baby. Even though he has screwed up in the past, I could see he was trying his best to fix everything. I was really impressed with how much improvement he has made, and it gave me hope. But what if I pick Kendall and he ends up hurting me again, or worse the baby. I couldn't have that. I needed the baby to be safe, not in danger. Especially if it was the baby's own father that was abusing her, but I would take the abuse then my daughter. But if I stayed with James, the baby and I would be ok. While I have been with him we have not fought once, nor has he hit me. I knew James loved me and this baby so much that he would never hurt us. But what if sometime down the road, he changes and things end up like it did with me and Kendall.

I have seen the way Carlos acts or even looks at James, and he seems interested in James. And what if James falls in love with Carlos, then leaves me. Then I will be alone and no one to help me with the baby. But if any of that does happen, I will try my best to raise the baby on my own. I don't always need Kendall and James, I can do certain things on my own. I just hope raising a baby is one of them.

About a week has passed and I still didn't have an answer. I thought for sure I would by now, but I didn't. So many reasons on why or why not I should pick one of them kept popping into my head. They did seem to calm down a bit and weren't fighting that much anymore, but I could still feel the tension between them. James would get jealous when Kendall would ask about the baby or even ask to feel the baby kick. I didn't really think it was a problem, I mean it was Kendall's baby. But even Kendall would have his moments where he would envy James. When I talked to James about things, Kendall would glare at us and stomp off to his room. Even if I wasn't supposed to be getting stressed out, I still was. After a month I still hadn't made a decision, and I knew James and Kendall were anxiously waiting for an answer. But I didn't have one yet. After I thought more about it, I finally made my choice. I just hope they both accept it.

Kendall and Carlos were watching TV and James was combing his hair with his lucky comb. I decided this was the best time to tell them my decision.

"Hey guys can I talk to you?" I asked.

They all stopped what they were doing and looked up at me.

"Wait am I involved or do you just want to talk to James and Kendall?" Carlos asked.

"I just need to talk to them" I said.

Carlos nodded and went to his room.

I sighed and turned back to Kendall and James. "Ok I know I said I would have an answer for you guys in a week, and I'm sorry it took more then a week, but it wasn't as easy as I thought"

"But you did make a choice, right?" Kendall asked.

"Yeah I did, I just hope you both accept it" I said.

"We will don't worry" James said.

I took a deep breath. "I know that you both love me, but I can only have one of you guys"

They nodded in agreement and I continued.

"Kendall. I know that you're the father of this baby and I know you will be there for me but…"

"I will I…." he started

I put up my hands. "Let me finish"

He nodded and let me continue.

"But I don't want you to become abusive again, especially now with the baby. I cant have you hurting her"

He nodded and I turned to James.

"James. you've been here for me the entire time and I thank you for that. I appreciate all the love and support you've giving me. But I'm afraid that certain things will get in the way and that I wont be good enough for you anymore."

"So who is it going to be?" James asked.

I sighed. "Neither"

"What!" they both said.

"Sorry guys, but I can be with either one of you. Its just I cant do it anymore, I've dealt with you both long enough and I cant do it anymore" I said.

"Then who's going to help you with the baby?" Kendall asked.

"I can do it myself. I realized I don't need help from you guys, a lot of people raise their kids alone all the time"

"Are you sure? Because I will be there for you even if the baby isn't mine" James said.

"Thanks but no thanks. I can do this. But I also made this decision because I'm the one who has ruined your friendship"

"No Logie you didn't. James and I are fighting because of other reasons, you did nothing wrong" Kendall said.

"Yes I did. Because of me you guys are fighting, and I don't like it. I want you guys to be friends again" I said.

Kendall sighed and looked at James. They both locked eyes for the first time in months. And I hoped it was somewhat of an improvement.

"Ok well I hope you guys understand why I made that choice" I said.

Kendall nodded. "Yeah I guess I do, but I wish you could give me another chance"

"So do I"

Kendall bit his lip and looked down. I really did want to give him another chance, but I couldn't go down that road again. It wasn't worth it.

"I hope you guys aren't mad at me" I said.

"No I guess I'm ok with it" James said.

I smiled. "Thanks James"

I looked over at Kendall who still had his head down. I guess he wasn't happy with my choice, but it wasn't up to him to decide, it was me. I sighed and walked back into my room. I gently laid down on my bed. I sort of felt relieved but then I didn't. I was hoping that not being with either one of them would help me to relax. I just hope it works. I placed a hand over my stomach and felt the baby kick slightly. I only had three months left. But they were probably going to be the hardest three months of my life.

**James POV**

I sighed and turned to face Kendall. He looked really upset and I didn't blame him. I was also hurt that Logan decided not to pick either one of us. I guess it was better this way because at least I would know that he wasn't getting abused by Kendall. But I still loved Logan and I was willing to make it work, but he obviously didn't want to. I just hope he realizes that he made a mistake and will come back to me. Even though our relationship is over, I still wanted to please him. He wanted Kendall and I to fix our friendship, but it wasn't going to be easy. We hated each other, or that's what it seemed like.

"Kendall are you ok?" I asked.

He shook his head. "What do you think? I just lost Logan again"

"I know how you feel, I lost him too"

"Yeah but James you don't know how hard I've been trying to win him back. I cant forget about him" Kendall said.

"I know, but I also have feelings for him too." I said

"But at least you have someone else to love, Logan was the only one I got"

"What do you mean?"

"Its obvious Carlos likes you maybe even loves you"

"He does?"

"Yeah were you that oblivious?"

"I guess. Now I feel awful. Carlos liked me and I ignored him and went out with Logan" I said.

"Yeah you had someone, but you decided to steal the love of my life" he said.

"I'm sorry Kendall. If I wouldve known Carlos liked me that way I would've given him a chance"

"Well maybe you can"

"I doubt it. He said he liked some girl at the pool. And why would he go out with me now, I screwed up everything" I said.

Kendall placed his hand on my shoulder. "We both screwed up ok. It wasn't just you"

I sighed. "Do you think we can fix it?"

"I hope so. I don't want to lose Logan, I need him" Kendall said.

"Maybe you can prove to him that you will never hurt him again"

"That's what I've been trying to do, but he still thinks I'm going to hurt him"

"I don't know, just try harder I guess" I said

He sighed. "I'm such an idiot. Why did I ever have to hurt him in the first place. He never deserved that. I'm such a horrible person. I bet I wont even be a good father"

"No Kendall you will be a good father. you've made really good progress and I know that you've changed. You just have to show Logan that your worthy enough to be his boyfriend again"

"Your actually going to let me have him. Your not going to fight for him?" he said.

I sighed. "I want to, but I think maybe you should have him back. Its really obvious that you still have feelings for him. And I don't want to risk our friendship"

He smiled. "Thanks James, you're the greatest"

I gave him a hug. "Yeah I know"

"Now all I have to do is win Logan back and you get Carlos" he said.

"Lets hope it works"

***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR***BTR

**Logan's POV**

_{Eight months into pregnancy}_

I thought I could do this all on my own, but I couldn't. It was hard not having James or Kendall with me. I guess James moved on because he was spending a lot of time with Carlos, and that made me a little sad. I just didn't want Kendall to move on and forget about what we had. Even though we went through some bad times, we also had some good ones. And I could never forget those. I was afraid since I told Kendall I didn't need him, that he would go find someone that did. And I knew who that person would be. Jo was always trying to get Kendall's attention because she wanted him back. But since he is no longer with me, he might go back with her. I needed him more then ever now and I didn't want to lose him. I still loved him and I hope he still loves me. I wanted him back. I wanted him to tell me he loves me and for us to start over. But I don't think he feels the same way anymore.

I hated being pregnant. It caused so many things to go wrong. I lost Kendall, the love of my life. And I probably ruined my friendship with James. Why couldn't the baby just arrive already. But when she did, it was only going to get harder and worse. I was going to be all alone, and I didn't want to be. My life was ruined because of all this. Big Time Rush was forced to go on hold because I wasn't around to practice, and having only three guys didn't work. I was afraid that we would have to go back to Minnesota if we didn't start rehearsing soon. But of course even after the baby is born, I still couldn't work because I would have to take care of her. Why did everything have to be so difficult. But I promise myself that I will take care of my baby alone, I know I can do it. No matter how hard its going to be. The only thing I could do is my homework. I didn't go to school, but Carlos would bring me my homework. I would always stay up late trying to finish it, which is what I'm doing now. I yawned and looked at the clock. It was eleven thirty. I knew I had to get some sleep because I had another ultrasound tomorrow. I started crying when I realized I would be going alone. I did really need Kendall. I needed him throughout this whole thing. Why did I have to push him away? Why did I have pretend that I didn't love or need him? I needed him so bad.

I wiped my tears and left the room I shared with James. I really missed my old room. I missed being able to see Kendall before I went to sleep and when I opened my eyes. I missed cuddling in his warm arms and kissing his sweet moist lips. I missed everything about him. I quietly made my way across the apartment and to Kendall and Carlos's room. I didn't have to be quiet for Mrs. Knight and Katie because they went to Minnesota to visit Kendall's grandparents for a few days. So I only had to make sure I didn't wake the guys. I reached the door and was about to knock. Just as I was about to, I stopped. I was wasting my time. Kendall doesn't love me anymore, and he probably never will. How could he when all I've done is push him away. I sighed and sat down on the couch. I buried my head in my lap and started crying. I tried my best to keep little sobs from escaping my mouth, but I didn't try hard enough. I stopped when I heard Kendall's voice.

"Logie?"

I looked up and saw Kendall standing in front of me, with a worried expression on his face.

"Logie what's wrong?" he asked as he sat next to me.

"I c-cant…do i-it" I said

"Do what?"

"I cant take care of this baby by myself"

He pulled me into a hug and rubbed my back. "Shh its ok, I'm going to help you"

"Y-you are?" I asked.

He pulled away and held me by my shoulders. "Of course I am. I'm not going to let you do this on your own"

"Thank y-you Kendall"

"Logie I know you may not love me anymore, but I still love you and…"

"Kendall…."

"Even if you don't feel the same way. Just know that I love you and never stopped loving you. You mean so much to me and always will. Please promise me that you will never forget about me or what he had, because I will never forget about you. I…"

I didn't let him finish because I pressed my lips to his. He kissed me back gently then passionately. I ran my fingers through his hair. God I missed this so much . We pulled apart and he placed his forehead on mine.

"I love you Logan so much"

"I love you too" I said.

He smiled and attached his lips to mine. I opened my mouth and allowed his tongue access. He moaned into the kiss and I tugged on his hair. I loved this feeling and I never wanted it to end. But the moment was killed when I felt a sharp pain shoot across my abdomen. I tried to ignore it and continue with Kendall. But then I felt something pop and then a liquid seep through my boxers. I gasped and Kendall stopped.

"Uh Logie, why are you wet?" he asked.

Another pain shot through my stomach and I let out a scream.

"Logan what's wrong?" he asked worriedly.

"K-Kendall…I think my water just broke" I said.


	27. Chapter 27

**Logan's POV**

"Wait Logie are you sure?" Kendall asked.

I grabbed my stomach and growled. "Of course I'm sure"

"Ok what do I do?" he asked.

"Get my stuff"

"What stuff?"

"Last week I packed a bag of things that I will need. Its under my bed"

Kendall quickly ran into the bedroom to get the bag. The pain in my abdomen subsided, but I knew it would return soon. About five minutes passed and Kendall still wasn't back. Another contraction hit and I doubled over in pain.

"Kendall hurry" I said.

He ran back into the living room carrying my duffle bag. A sleepy James right behind him.

James rubbed his eyes. "What's going on?"

"Logan's gone into labor!" Kendall said.

"What!'

"James you need to help me" Kendall said

"Ok I'll go get the car and you wake Carlos up" James said.

Kendall nodded and went to get Carlos.

"Logan how are you doing?" James asked.

"Not good. The contractions are getting closer together" I said.

"Its ok just relax and take deep breaths"

I nodded and did what he said. But it wasn't really helping at all. I clutched my stomach and hissed in pain.

"Here just sit down and I'll be right back" James said before leaving the apartment.

I gently sat down on the couch and waited for the contraction to pass.

"Kendall!" I screamed.

He ran back into the living room with Carlos.

"I'm here Logie" he said grabbing my hand.

I squeezed his hand and he yelped.

"Sorry" I said.

"Its fine"

"Tell James to hurry…ah!…up"

Kendall nodded and pulled out his cell phone.

"James where are you? Ok we'll be right there" Kendall said before hanging up.

"Well"

"He's waiting for us downstairs"

Kendall gave Carlos the bag and helped me up from the couch. Once in the lobby I tried my best to keep quiet, so I wouldn't wake Bitters up. I didn't want him to know that I was pregnant and about to give birth. I doubled over as another contraction washed over my body.

"Its ok Logie, we're almost to the car" Kendall said.

I nodded and we made our way outside. James was already in the car and waiting for us. Kendall helped me into the backseat, while Carlos sat up front with James. I laid down and rested my head in Kendall's lap.

"Kendall its h-hurts" I said.

"Shh I know, but everything will be ok" he said while rubbing my forehead.

I nodded and shut my eyes. We finally arrived at the hospital and Kendall led me inside. I sat in the waiting room with Kendall and Carlos, while James went to get a doctor. A few minutes later, James returned with Courtney at his side.

"Logan how far apart are your contractions?" she asked.

"I don't know, three minutes I guess" I said.

"Ok well we don't have a c-section set up for you, so your going to have to wait" she said.

"I cant wait any longer" I said with tears in my eyes.

"I'm sorry dear but your going to have to. If you follow me I have a empty room for you to wait in"

I nodded and we followed her. She opened the door to the room and we went inside. I climbed up on the bed and laid down.

"I'll let you know when we're ready for you" Courtney said before leaving the room.

"I should've called them before we got here. I'm sorry Logie" Kendall said.

"No its fine" I said.

He sat in the chair next to the bed and took my hand. He started rubbing my knuckles with his thumb. I squeezed his hand when another contraction hit.

"Logie just breath ok"

I nodded and tried to concentrate on my breathing and not the pain.

"God it hurts so much" I said.

"I know, but just think our baby will be here soon" Kendall said.

"But I'm not due for another three weeks"

"I guess she wanted to come early"

I let out another scream and squeezed Kendall's hand harder.

"Why cant you just push?" Carlos asked.

"I cant you idiot" I growled.

"Why not?"

Kendall rolled his eyes. "Really Carlos?"

"What I'm just wondering why he wont do that instead" he said.

"Carlos think about what your saying" James said.

"Oh yeah" Carlos said sheepishly.

I couldn't help but chuckle, even in all the pain I was in.

"What's so funny?" Kendall asked.

"Nothing" I said.

He smiled and gave me a kiss on the lips.

"I love you Logie"

"I love you too"

The door to the room opened and Courtney walked in.

"Ok we're ready for you" she said.

I nodded and was immediately placed on a gurney.

"Can Kendall come with me?" I asked.

"We don't usually want people in the operating room, but in this case its acceptable" she said.

James walked over to me and placed his hand on my shoulder. "We'll see you later ok"

"Aw I wanted to see the baby" Carlos said.

"Don't worry Carlitos you will" James said while placing his arm around him.

Carlos smiled and left the room with James. I was rushed into a different room and changed into a hospital gown. The new room made me nervous. My eyes widened when I noticed the cart with surgical tools on it.

Kendall squeezed my hand gently. "Its ok Logie"

"Logan I need you to sit up ok" Courtney said.

I groaned and carefully sat up. My eyes widened when I saw her pull out a big needle. I gulped and Kendall squeezed my hand again.

"What's that for?" Kendall asked.

"This will numb the pain so Logan cant feel anything" she said.

"Will it hurt?" I asked.

"You will only feel a little pinch"

She opened up my hospital gown and positioned the needle to my back. I took a deep breath.

"Do you want me to count it down?" she asked.

"No just do it" I said.

She nodded and I could feel the needle enter me. I hissed in pain and held on to Kendall's hand, which caused him to yelp. I probably broke his hand or something because of how hard I have been squeezing it.

"Ok all done" she said putting the needle away and closing up my hospital gown.

I laid back down and was glad that was over with.

"Ok Logan you ready to have a baby" she said.

I nodded. A nurse placed a blue curtain over my chest. The medication was already kicking in and I could barely feel the pain. I noticed Kendall's eyes go wide.

"What's wrong?" I asked

"Just some of the tools she's using" he said.

"Its ok Kendall"

He looked at my stomach, then quickly turned away.

"You don't feel that?" he asked.

I shook my head. "Nope"

His face turned pale and he looked like was going to pass out. But he better not because I need him.

"Please Kendall stay with me, I need you" I said.

He took a few deep breaths to relax himself.

"Just look at me ok"

He nodded and kept his eyes on mine.

"Ok Logan your going to feel a little bit of pressure" Courtney said.

I nodded and I did feel it. I squeezed Kendall's hand and shut my eyes. I opened my eyes again when I heard the first cries of my daughter. She was pretty loud, but her cry was beautiful. I caught a little glimpse of her before she was taken away.

"She's beautiful" Kendall said as he gave me a kiss on the forehead.

I smiled. "I love you Kendall"

"I love you too Logie"

I could feel my eyes start to droop. My eyes finally closed and I fell into a deep sleep.

**Kendall's POV**

Its been about three hours and Logan was still asleep. He seemed really exhausted and I didn't blame him. I mean he just had a baby, and a beautiful one at that. Our daughter had a fair skin tone and Logan's black hair. I was happy that she had my eyes. I couldn't help but smile at the sight of her. She was the most beautiful thing my eyes have ever seen, well besides Logan that is. While Logan was sleeping, I held our daughter in my arms and spoke to her softly.

"Daddy loves you very much" I said.

I gave her a kiss on the head and started humming to her. Her eyes fluttered, then closed. I gently rocked her while she slept. I felt so blessed to have her and Logan in my life. Without them I would be nothing. Now that I had both of them, my life was complete.

"I promise I will never hurt you" I said before giving her another kiss on the head.

I heard Logan whimper and I looked up at him. He carefully sat up and rubbed his eyes. Our eyes met and he smiled.

"Hey Logie, how are you feeling?" I asked.

"I'm still a little sore" he said.

"Yeah but you will feel better soon"

"Is that…" he said pointing at the baby.

"Yeah its our daughter. Would you like to meet her?" I asked.

He nodded his head and I walked over to him. I carefully handed her over to him and he smiled. She opened her eyes and looked at Logan. His eyes immediately filled up with tears.

"She so beautiful" he said.

I smiled. "Yeah she is"

"Kendall we don't have a name for her"

"Hmm what bout Naomi?"

"Naomi. I like it" he said.

I sat on the bed next to him and pulled him close.

"She has your hair" I said.

"And your eyes" he said.

"Do you want me to bring James and Carlos in here?"

He nodded. "Yeah"

I gave him a kiss on the forehead and went to meet Carlos and James. I should've told them about Naomi before, but I didn't want to leave her or Logan's side. I walked into the waiting room and was asked a whole bunch of questions. Mostly from Carlos.

"Is Logan ok?" James asked.

How's the baby? Is she cute? What does she look like? Was there a lot of blood?" Carlos asked.

"Guys relax. Logan and the baby are ok" I said.

James and Carlos sighed in relief.

"Would you guys like to meet your niece?" I asked.

They nodded their heads and followed me back to the room. I opened the door and Logan looked up. He smiled and waved Carlos and James over.

"Aw Logan she's so cute" Carlos said.

"Do you want to hold her?" Logan asked.

Carlos nodded and Logan gently placed Naomi in his arms. Carlos held her perfectly. He looked up and smiled.

"She's beautiful"

"Hey James, do you wanna hold her?" I asked.

"Huh? Oh I don't know" he said.

"Aw come on James, hold your niece" Carlos said.

James nodded and walked over to Carlos. Naomi was handed to him and he smiled.

"She looks just like you guys" he said.

"I hope she likes corndogs" Carlos said.

I chuckled. "She might"

"And hockey and swirly slides and…"

"Ok Carlos calm down" James said.

"Sorry" he said.

"So what did you name her?" James asked.

"Naomi" Logan said.

"That's pretty" James said.

"I would have named her little Carlos" Carlos said.

"But she's a girl" James said.

"Then Carlota" he said.

I chuckled. "I think she looks more like a Naomi"

"Oh Kendall, does your mom and Katie know?" Logan asked.

"Yeah I told her" I said

"What did she say?"

"She said she will try and get here as soon as she can"

Logan yawned. "Ok"

"Why don't you go back to sleep and I'll wake you when they arrive"

He nodded and closed his eyes. In a matter of minutes he was out and snoring softly. I smiled and gave him a kiss on the forehead. James handed me Naomi and I sat down again.

"How did I get so lucky" I said.

"Yeah…. um Kendall" James said.

"Yeah"

"Please don't screw up because I know you don't want to lose them. Just don't do anything to lose them forever" he said.

I looked up at him. "James I promise I wont. I'm not like that anymore"

"Ok please don't break this promise"

"I wont"

He nodded and stood up. "Is it alright if Carlos and I go home"

I looked over at the other chair to find a sleeping Carlos.

"Yeah that's fine" I said.

James walked over and woke Carlos up.

"Night" Carlos said sleepily before walking out of the room.

"Good night Kendall" James said before following Carlos.

Once they left I turned back to Naomi. She looked exactly like Logan when she slept. I just hope she has his crooked grin. My phone started ringing and I quickly answered it.

"Hello"

"_Hi honey is everything alright?"_

"Oh hi mom, yeah everything's fine"

"_Ok I just wanted to let you know I will be there in about an hour"_

"Yeah ok I'll see you soon"

"_Ok love you"_

"Love you too"

The call ended and I put my phone away. I turned back to Naomi and smiled. I never wanted to let her go. About an hour and half later the door to the room opened. My mom and Katie walked in, holding a balloon that said **it's a girl. **My mom squealed when she saw the baby.

"Oh honey she is so precious" she said.

I smiled. "Thanks. Do you want to hold her?"

My mom nodded her head and smiled once Naomi was in her arms.

"What's her name?" Kate asked walking up to our mom and touching Naomi on the foot.

"We named her Naomi" I said.

"Cute" Katie said.

"Its adorable" my mom said.

Katie looked over at Logan and chuckled. "He's out cold"

I smiled. "Yeah but he needs the rest"

"Can I hold her?" Katie asked.

"Yeah but please be careful with her" I said.

"I will" she said

My mom handed Naomi to Katie.

"Watch her head" I said.

"I know calm down" she said.

Katie walked over to one of the empty chairs and sat down. She cuddled Naomi in her arms.

"Are you sure you can do this?" my mom asked.

"Yeah I think we can do it" I said.

"Ok but just remember having a baby is a big responsibility"

"I know mom, but I think we're ready for one"

She smiled and gave me a hug. "Just know that I will help out ok"

"Thanks mom"

She pulled away and gave me a kiss on the head. "I love you honey"

"I love you too"

"Ok I'm going to take Katie home, I will pick you boys up tomorrow" she said

"Yeah ok"

Katie gave me Naomi back then left with my mom. I was so happy that my friends and family believed that I was capable of taking care of a baby. I knew I could do it, but if Logan was with me. Together we can get though anything.

**Logan's POV**

I was so happy that I was back at the Palm Woods and in apartment 2J. I had to sneak in through the back so no one could see the baby. I invited Kelly and Gustavo over to see Naomi. Kelly loved her and Naomi seemed very fond of Kelly as well. Kelly would make Naomi giggle by playing peek a boo with her, and it was really adorable. I was afraid to give Naomi to Gustavo, in a fear that he might eat her or something. But Mrs. Knight told me too. I handed Gustavo the baby and everything seemed to be going fine, until Naomi spit up on him. I tried not to laugh, but it was so funny I couldn't hold in the laughter. Gustavo vowed never to hold my baby again.

About a few weeks passed and Kendall and I were doing good. He had defiantly changed and I couldn't be happier. He and Naomi made a bond that could never be broken. He loved that little girl more then anything. I have to admit raising a baby at seventeen wasn't easy. Especially when you were also a pop star. But Kendall and I were doing just fine. No matter how hard a situation would get, we could get through it. We could get through just about anything, and we've proved it.

I sighed and sat down on the couch. Kendall was holding Naomi and singing to her. I couldn't help but smile. The scene was absolutely adorable. I never wanted to lose them. I loved Kendall and Naomi so much. They meant the world to me. It seemed that everything was back to the way it was. My relationship with Kendall was strong and only getting stronger. He did prove that he has changed and that he loves me.

I looked away from Kendall and Naomi to face James and Carlos. They decided to try going out, and it seemed to be working. They would spend every minute of every day together. I smiled at them. They were really cute together. There was no more drama or tension between us, and that's what I wanted. Everything was back to normal and I couldn't be happier. My life was great. I had the love of my life and daughter, what could get any better. I guess you could say this is the end. But its only the beginning.

**THE END**

**A/N: so thats the end to this story. im sad i have to end it but all good things must come to an you to everyone that has helped out and also reviewed this story. it means alot. if i never wouldve gotten reviews i probably wouldnt have finsished this story. so thanks again. i will probably write more kogan fics so yeah. anyway i hoped everyone enjoyed this chpater and the story. =D love you guys 3**


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